ostheer Posted May 13, 2015 Posted May 13, 2015 (edited) me and my ex-girlfriend broke up 5 years ago after dating for 3 years. Long story short, I caught her cheating on me with an other men. At the time the break up almost killed me when I found out she was having sex with the other men behind my back. When she asked me if we still can be friends, I told her I hate her and I would never forgive her. When we broke up I was in 3rd year studying engineering in a local university, and I found myself couldn't focus on my school work, so I took a year off and joined the army reserve. We broke every connection and I haven't seen her or talked to her ever since. Fast forward 5 years later, I graduated from engineering and found a great job as a system engineering working in a different province. I work during the weekdays and I go to the army reserve on the weekends. As there are not much girls at my work and I don't have much free time I never had a serious relation ever since. But just last week when I went back visiting my parents I saw her again. We sat down at a coffee shop and she told me her current relationship is horrible as her boyfriend frequently abuses her. I told her to leave him, but she said she doesn't have a job and is dependent on him financially. She begged me to take her back and she will do anything to make me happy, but when I left I told her I need some time to think it over. I still misses the time we had together and still care about her. But I don't want to repeat the same mistake and I don't think I can ever trust her again. What should I do? Thank you in advance. Regards from Canada. Edited May 13, 2015 by ostheer
I_Give_Up67 Posted May 13, 2015 Posted May 13, 2015 but she said she doesn't have a job and is dependent on him financially. She begged me to take her back and she will do anything to make me happy. Don't do it! See the bolded above. This is the true reason she wants to get back with you. She needs a fresh "doormat" to wipe her feet on, and that will be you if you get back with her. No, you will not ever be able to trust her again either. She chose to be a wh**e when you two were in a relationship, and I promise you that she has not changed. Find yourself a decent woman without the history and baggage that she has. 3
Ruby65 Posted May 13, 2015 Posted May 13, 2015 You miss the time you spent together... ... but she was cheating on you during that time. You miss the days BEFORE you knew she was a cheater, the fantasy you had of her being a faithful girlfriend, but that was never the truth. I agree with the above post that you deserve to be with someone who won't be using you financially to survive, it's disgraceful she's financially dependent on her boyfriend at her age. What's wrong with her? Can't she get a job? Walk away and keep walking! You deserve an equal partner -- not someone who's going to live off you and probably go right back to cheating on you as well. 2
No Limit Posted May 13, 2015 Posted May 13, 2015 Oh my God don't take her back, please don't. She's the pathetic type that runs from one abusive guy to the next and when there's a "save one" like you, she'll use him financially and cheat on him nonstop. The latter she already did to you, please don't add the former as well. I'm sure she'd love to get back with you now since she knows due to your career she can entertain other guys in your apartment for hours at a time. Just because you haven't had any for a while now doesn't mean you have to throw away the rest. Run run run, cut ties to her again and make it stay this way for good this time!
Author ostheer Posted May 13, 2015 Author Posted May 13, 2015 thanks for all the advice. I have made up my mind now 2
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