How Do You Know Your Being Cheated On and Why Does Cheating Happen?

[sunshinesunshine]

How do you know that you're being cheated on, what are the signs? And why do people cheat in the first place?

[regine_phalange]

In two occasions (at least) I was cheated on.

 

Both times I felt that something was off the day it happened. You know, a strange gut feeling? A small different detail on your boyfriend's behaviour.

 

In the first case I could feel it even in a 2.800 km distance. I knew that something was stinking when my then-boyfriend said he'll be out of reach for the rest of the day. I confirmed after we broke up (soon after). A mutual friend told me this, and all the creepy details. I pitied the other woman, as much as I pitied myself, because she wasn't aware of my existence either. Plus he slept with her so he could use her professional connections. Then he dumped her. A sociopath in all his glory.

 

In the second case, my boyfriend was also out of reach for some hours. Some weeks later I bluffed, and he fell in the trap like a fool. He wasn't a sociopath, he was otherwise a good guy. But he had some serious insecurities and control issues.

[cessna]

The one time I was cheated on that I know of I didn't have a clue. I was young and inexperienced though and looking back now I can't believe I didn't see the signs at the time. They were so blatant!

 

She ended up breaking up with me for whatever reason and I found out a month later from a mutual workmate that she was cheating all along.

[empresario]

Finding deceit is in the details. If you're never been cheated on before...you don't recognize it, you just think things are off or that something changed for a bit.

 

 

My last 2 'girlfriends' cheated. I found out about both after they had both happened (so I wasn't able to let one experience build on the other).

 

 

In hindsight, both had obvious warning signs. You can read it all over them if you pay attention to what they do normally. If it ever happens again, I'll be able to see it five miles away. It's like bluffing in poker. No matter how subtle it is...everyone has a tell.