Gaeta Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 This morning I left my car at the dealership and asked for the shuttle service to get to work. As I exit the building I come face to face with a man I briefly dated 10 YRS AGO. We both went 'HOLY COW' - WOW! It was mind blowing! The eye contact was instant and we did not unlock it for a second! We updated each other on the job, kids, stuff. People would come in and out the door and we stood there like 2 idiots unaware of the surrounding world. I heard a few times in the background 'madame please embark the shuttle is leaving' I had to break away from him. We did not know what to say for good byes, he said 'I guess - see you next time' and as I walked away I 'ya, see you next time.....'. I sat in the shuttle in disbelief. It was like being thrown back 10 years and I felt the same I used to feel when I looked in his babyblue eyes. I don't know what to do with this. Do I just look at it like a nice moment and nothing more? Do I wait for him to look me up again?
katiegrl Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Is he single? Available? Married? Did you get a chance to find out?
fitnessfan365 Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 I'm personally a big fan of women that put themselves out there. At the same time though, you want to let him be the guy and take the lead. So if you know how to get in touch with him, send this - "It was great running into you at the dealership the other day! Hopefully it doesn't take another ten years for us to see each other again. ;-) " If he was feeling the same vibe as you, he'll run with it and ask you out.
Gary S Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 CAN YOU GET TOGETHER AGAIN WITH A LOVER FROM THE PAST?
katiegrl Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 I'm personally a big fan of women that put themselves out there. At the same time though, you want to let him be the guy and take the lead. So if you know how to get in touch with him, send this - "It was great running into you at the dealership the other day! Hopefully it doesn't take another ten years for us to see each other again. ;-) " If he was feeling the same vibe as you, he'll run with it and ask you out. ^^This, but find out if he is available first. Google him, find out his status. If he is married/divorced, it's public record...
Toodaloo Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Sod it - look him up and ask if he wants to go out for a beer xx 2
katiegrl Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Gaeta, it is fairly easy to find out his status.. if he is married, DON'T go there... 1
Author Gaeta Posted May 12, 2015 Author Posted May 12, 2015 We both recently had come out of long term relationships, no more than 1-2 months for both of us. He was the first man I ever met from online dating, I was his first one as well. We dated 2-3 months, it was very physical, actually it was mainly physical. We never involved children, friend or family. After 2-3 months I wanted more and he bailed. Something I cannot hold against him, we were both at the bottom of the barrel at the time.
Author Gaeta Posted May 12, 2015 Author Posted May 12, 2015 Gaeta, it is fairly easy to find out his status.. if he is married, DON'T go there... Easy how? Couples don't marry here so looking for a ring or marriage records is useless. I can only find his business FB page, no personal page to verify his status. But if he were with someone wouldn't it be part of the update?
Diezel Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 After 2-3 months I wanted more and he bailed. Something I cannot hold against him, we were both at the bottom of the barrel at the time. Don't pursue this as anything more than just a moment. If not, he'd mention calling you or getting coffee or a drink sometime soon. 1
katiegrl Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Easy how? Couples don't marry here so looking for a ring or marriage records is useless. I can only find his business FB page, no personal page to verify his status. But if he were with someone wouldn't it be part of the update? I forgot you are in Canada. In the U.S. virtually everything is public record... Couples don't marry in Canada? Well the odds are in your favor then...but he could still be in a relationship. By update, do you mean he would have mentioned it while you were chatting? I dunno, did you ask? If not, then no not necessarily. If I ran into an old boyfriend, and we were catching up, no I wouldn't just volunteer that I am in a relationship. Why would I, unless he asked. I would just treat it like he was an old friend/lover and we we catching up. If he asked, then of course I would tell him. But to suddenly announce I have a boyfriend would be rather presumptuous IMO. Why would I presume he would even be interested to know that unless he wanted to date me again, right? And if he did, he would ask, and if I were single, he would ask for my number. Since neither one of you did that...I dunno if it were me, I would just chalk it up to two old friends/lovers running into each other, and catching up briefly. It's always exciting to get a blast from the past like that...it's usually nothing more than that. Just me....
Mrlonelyone Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Two options. The emotionally safe route is to take it as a nice moment and nothing more. The risky but more rewarding option is to find and contact him by any non-creepy means necessary. Do you want to be safe or do you want to have a LTR? You can never really be both.
katiegrl Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 We both recently had come out of long term relationships, no more than 1-2 months for both of us. He was the first man I ever met from online dating, I was his first one as well. We dated 2-3 months, it was very physical, actually it was mainly physical. We never involved children, friend or family. ***After 2-3 months I wanted more and he bailed. **** Something I cannot hold against him, we were both at the bottom of the barrel at the time. Gaeta, don't go back there, come on. He bailed then, what makes you think it would be any different now. Don't go chasing after him....move forward. Always move toward. Let the past go. It was a nice moment... 2
Author Gaeta Posted May 12, 2015 Author Posted May 12, 2015 Couples don't marry in Canada? Well the odds are in your favor then...but he could still be in a relationship. My Province is different than the rest of Canada because of our French heritage and way of life. Here we almost don't marry anymore, we live common-law, so no records.
Author Gaeta Posted May 12, 2015 Author Posted May 12, 2015 I am not going to look him up and it has nothing to do with the fact he bailed 10 years ago. Like I've explained we were both at the bottom of the barrel, we both were emotional wrecks and both had lost everything, he also had just learn the mother of his children had a chronic illness shortening her life a great deal. He did what he did at the time because it was how he could handle it then. 1
Recommended Posts