fitnessfan365 Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 (edited) I'll be the first to say that I am a realist and that I've become kind of a dating cynic. However, the intense, instant chemistry that Leigh is always preaching about, happened to me today. Met her this morning. Three emails a piece within 30 minutes. We just instantly got each other in terms of dating dynamics. Get her number and shoot her a text (she's on the work shuttle). We exchange five a piece and continue to just click. I ask if she's free tonight and she accepts. Asks what I want her to wear - throw back to the old thread. Haha I let her know that I'd like to see her in a dress and heels. She happily complies. In person - instant sparks with first eye contact. I walked up, softly kissed her, and she said "I was hoping you'd do that". A few minutes later, she says "I'd like another kiss please". So I kiss her, she softly begins to moan, and I can feel my heart pounding. After that, the majority of the date was conversation based. We had so much in common and felt genuinely comfortable. Walked her to her car where it got very intense. But I remained controlled and wished her good night. Then just for the hell of it, I called her on the drive home. She loved that I did and we talked for a bit. She stressed she's never done a day of first date before, and that she never kisses on a first date either. But she felt immediately drawn to me since we met and I agreed how rare it was for me as well. Finally to break with tradition, I not only planned the next date at the end of the first one, but am seeing her this weekend which I never do early on. HOLY CRAP.. I guess when you click with someone, nothing goes according to rules or plans does it? Edited May 12, 2015 by fitnessfan365 6
regine_phalange Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Uh oh, we're going to have a second nagasaki soon. I think this kind of "broken rules" is the salt and pepper! These are the things you remember 10 years after, not the fact that you waited for 5 days to call...
Author fitnessfan365 Posted May 12, 2015 Author Posted May 12, 2015 Haha.. Well if I have a good date, I always send a follow up text the next day. Then if she responds, I make plans for the next date via phone call a few days later. But I have never in my life, ever called a woman on the same night after a date ended. Nor have I ever planned the second date at the end of the first one. However, calling her and planning tonight felt like the thing to do. Especially since I could tell how surprised she was that it got intense at the car and then she re-confirmed that on the phone. So I made the right call (love bad puns) and she appreciated it. However, just wow. Not only is she very feminine, traditional, and likes the fact that I am a dominant gentleman, but we have so much in common and just clicked. I left feeling like I'd known her awhile. Crazy... 1
Gaeta Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 That's wonderful FF :-) Like I say often one day we meet someone that grabs our full attention and dating rules - and check list go out the window! I'm glad you get to experience that! 2
neowulf Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 *fist bump* Nicely done man. Nicely done. It's a rare and beautiful thing when it happens.
katiegrl Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Ha! I am SO glad you've finally experienced what many of us having been talking about all these months! NOW you understand... This type of immediate connection is how all three of my LTRs started, including current. And I would never settle for anything less now. It's also why multi dating (juggling) is so impossible for some of us. I mean, now that you've met her and *clicked* so well the way you did, and given the way you feel, do you really think you'll be happy continuing to date/pursue other chicks? All you will be thinking about is "this" girl! So much for your old stance "a woman shouldn't even be on your radar after one date." :) :) I am SO happy for you... I hope it works out. Keep us posted! Since this feeling/immediate connection is new for you, your emotions may be in a bit of a whirlwind for awhile. Yay! 1
Thermals Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 This sounds exactly like a first date/ second date experience I recently had. I was on cloud nine and then -- so it seems -- my performance in bed destroyed everything. I'd like to think that wasn't the culprit but who the ##### knows. I'm happy for you. Remember to tread carefully. You don't the disappointment should this end up being a short-lived fling.
Omei Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 I found it weird she asked you what she should wear but I liked your reply. Good luck hopefully all gos well tell us about second date soon
katiegrl Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 (edited) I found it weird she asked you what she should wear but I liked your reply. Good luck hopefully all gos well tell us about second date soon I found that weird too... but given his previous thread discussing how much he loves women in sexy dresses, maybe she read his mind? Or sensed his vibe/energy. It happens that way sometimes when two people really *click*....:bunny: Edited May 12, 2015 by katiegrl
Author fitnessfan365 Posted May 12, 2015 Author Posted May 12, 2015 I found it weird she asked you what she should wear but I liked your reply. Good luck hopefully all gos well tell us about second date soon Based on how instantly we clicked, I playfully told her to wear a good Chapstick because I had a feeling I'd want to kiss her. She said she definitely would and then asked what else I'd like her to wear. As Gaeta was saying in the other thread, women in positions of power professionally (she's an executive) like to be submissive in their dating/romantic life. So one aspect of that is taking pleasure in dressing to visually please the guy. She does online dating because she's very busy with work. So according to her, all the guys she's been meeting online were "super nice" but didn't inspire her to be herself. But she could tell I was different the second she started talking to me, and I got what dating preferences she liked as well. This type of dynamic has actually been somewhat common with women that I date. 1
jen1447 Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 Bah, toss out spontaneity and get back to the 'rules!' 1
Author fitnessfan365 Posted May 12, 2015 Author Posted May 12, 2015 Bah, toss out spontaneity and get back to the 'rules!' Haha.. It's funny because I actually like being spontaneous in general. But on a first date, I've always had more of a planning mentality. Stranger you just met, respecting their schedule, etc.. But wow. Flowed so well from the very beginning I just said "Fck it". But regine_phalange is right. The fact that I handled it so differently and that it worked out so well because of it, is what will always make the date stick with me.
whirl3daway Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 oooh, this story is sexy! *fans self* keep us updated! 1
Vintage79 Posted May 12, 2015 Posted May 12, 2015 The rules are only necessary if things aren't great - if you have to play by the rules, you might as well move onto the next person, as something's missing. It sounds like you found something potentially very interesting - hopefully it continues to go well...
Author fitnessfan365 Posted May 16, 2015 Author Posted May 16, 2015 Had date # 2 last night. My folks live in a gated community that has a public entertainment building. Holiday parties and monthly social events get hosted in there. There is also an upstairs area with couches to sit on, bookshelves with tons of free books to borrow, a pool table, etc.. The cool thing though is that most nights the place is absolutely deserted. So you have a nice quiet place to shoot pool and to relax. Lots of laughter, good conversation, and we had a lot of fun playing pool. Things also heated up physically. But out of respect for where my folks live, I'd never let it get out of hand up there. Just imagine some elderly couple walking upstairs to grab a book together, and one of them has a heart attack seeing me taking a woman over the pool table. However, will definitely be seeing her again!
Gary S Posted May 16, 2015 Posted May 16, 2015 So when you first set eyes on her on the first meet you kissed on the lips? was it just a peck or more? Give it a grade from 1-10. That's pretty good! Have you ever picked one up from home on a first meet (not recommended ladies, but sometimes the chemistry is just sky high)
katiegrl Posted May 16, 2015 Posted May 16, 2015 Had date # 2 last night. My folks live in a gated community that has a public entertainment building. Holiday parties and monthly social events get hosted in there. There is also an upstairs area with couches to sit on, bookshelves with tons of free books to borrow, a pool table, etc.. The cool thing though is that most nights the place is absolutely deserted. So you have a nice quiet place to shoot pool and to relax. Lots of laughter, good conversation, and we had a lot of fun playing pool. Things also heated up physically. But out of respect for where my folks live, I'd never let it get out of hand up there. ***Just imagine some elderly couple walking upstairs to grab a book together, and one of them has a heart attack seeing me taking a woman over the pool table. *** However, will definitely be seeing her again! Just imagine if your PARENTS walked upstairs and saw their son humped over some strange (to them) chick on the pool table! Lol Glad it went well.....
Author fitnessfan365 Posted May 16, 2015 Author Posted May 16, 2015 So when you first set eyes on her on the first meet you kissed on the lips? was it just a peck or more? Give it a grade from 1-10. That's pretty good! Have you ever picked one up from home on a first meet (not recommended ladies, but sometimes the chemistry is just sky high) I've done it sparingly in the past with OLD "meets". Sometimes there is a lot of romantic tension on the phone call and in the texts we've exchanged. So I'll playfully say "You're daring me to kiss you on sight aren't you?". Since I read it right in each case, the woman responded positively. Then I close it out by telling her to wear good Chapstick. When she walks up in person, I greet her with a kiss. Nothing over the top. Just soft, closed mouth, and lingering for a few seconds. It sets a romantic tone, and gets rid of the "will we kiss" anxiety. But I do want to stress that I've only done this a handful of times with all the OLD first dates I've had. You just have to read the situation right and act with confidence when there is a ton of initial chemistry going in.
Author fitnessfan365 Posted May 16, 2015 Author Posted May 16, 2015 That's just a peck. Still, pretty good! Haha.. In my mind, a "peck" is a stiff lipped hit and run that ends quickly with no sense of romance at all. A soft kiss, that lingers isn't a peck on the lips. I mean remember Gary, this is a woman I am meeting for the first time. So I am not going to get into an extended kissing session or make out with her. But look at it this way. She wouldn't have said 'Please kiss me again" off a peck on the lips.
Gaeta Posted May 16, 2015 Posted May 16, 2015 Had date # 2 last night. My folks live in a gated community that has a public entertainment building. Holiday parties and monthly social events get hosted in there. There is also an upstairs area with couches to sit on, bookshelves with tons of free books to borrow, a pool table, etc.. The cool thing though is that most nights the place is absolutely deserted. So you have a nice quiet place to shoot pool and to relax. Lots of laughter, good conversation, and we had a lot of fun playing pool. Things also heated up physically. But out of respect for where my folks live, I'd never let it get out of hand up there. Just imagine some elderly couple walking upstairs to grab a book together, and one of them has a heart attack seeing me taking a woman over the pool table. However, will definitely be seeing her again! That sounds like a great date! Out of curiosity, did you approach this one differently than the book store woman?
Gary S Posted May 16, 2015 Posted May 16, 2015 Oh don't get me wrong, a peck the first time you lay eyes on a stranger is exceptional. You da man!
Author fitnessfan365 Posted May 16, 2015 Author Posted May 16, 2015 That sounds like a great date! Out of curiosity, did you approach this one differently than the book store woman? How I acted as a whole was basically the same. My goal for better or worse it to always be myself. But there were subtle differences. With Ms T-Shirt, I knew that I enjoyed her personality on a basic level. But didn't have any sort of read on basic chemistry. That's why I shook her hand, and then held on a bit longer to playfully twirl her around. This communicated that I liked what I saw and created some basic tension on the spot. She really liked it and it got her to loosen up right away. Then over the course of the date, I continued to bring her out of her shell and we had a very nice kiss close. With "J", the chemistry was INTENSE going in. I mean we could both tell even from the first few emails we were on the same page. The texts only increased it. So that's why I felt confident to ask her out for that same night and why I kiss greeted her. From there the whole first date was very romantic in tone. So that energy carried over into the second date.
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