Biscous Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 I will tell you the highlights: -was at friend's house warming party -friend and fiance (coworker) own the house -things were COOL all night -fiance, her cousin, and my gf were talking outside -I guess things got heated -I walk outside and see this girl land two hits on my gf -Cursing, swearing ensured. -I break it up of course. -My friend apologizes. -Mexican girls and alcohol. My girlfriend was sober. I think that there was a bit of animosity from these girls to my girl in the past is why it escalated. We were there for 4-5 hours. My girlfriend felt ganged up on verbally, and I know she has a sharp tongue (which I asked her why she would say certain things) and I'm sure it got heated. Regardless, the attack was unwarranted. Pissed at the whole situation. The fiance (girl who attacked my gf) said she failed me as a friend (woman has kinda backstabbed me in the past but thought she was 'protecting' me)....I have kept my distance from her maybe seeing them every 4-5 months. Girlfriend mad at me for allowing that to happen and she keeps saying they are my friends. My girlfriend wants me to handle the situation. The thing is that I believe my girlfriend was asked to leave and she didn't which make things look bad. Neither party is innocent, but the attack makes it even worse. We all work in the same company and I'm wondering if any recourse will happen if I tell her boss. Regardless if it happened inside the workplace or not, it's still creates a hostile environment as they work on certain projects together. Situation is ****ed because my friendship with my guy friend is severed on account of his fiance's actions.... Also my girlfriend is mad at me because I told her she could have exercised better judgement and probably defused it or got away. It's just unfortunate because last year she got assaulted by one of her friends and there was alcohol involved again so it's hard to believe that she is completely innocent here.
beach Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 She's not innocent, as she did participate. You are right she could have defused it all, but she didn't. And she's done this before... Time to rethink why you want to continue with her... You want this long term?
Author Biscous Posted May 11, 2015 Author Posted May 11, 2015 She's not innocent, as she did participate. You are right she could have defused it all, but she didn't. And she's done this before... Time to rethink why you want to continue with her... You want this long term? Ouch. Straight to the point. I think the people that did this to her were trash and sloppy drunks. I guess she has a reputation for that looking back. My girlfriend talks back, is "sassy" so me thinking she is innocent is not possible. The time she was assaulted by her friend she didn't have a way to get back home and the other girl did antagonize her. I wasn't there but I know it was a bad situation. Still, putting herself in these situations and not exercising good judgement is my issue. I also asked her lets go home an hour earlier before this happened.
Dork Vader Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 Fairly confident all of you have some amount of blame in this situation. You seem to have clearly known there was an issue between your girl friend and your home boys woman. Thus you should have never brought her into the mix or at the very least kept an eye on her. As soon as she started to get irritated or up set she should have found you and said let's go. At that point you should have left and asked your woman what was up. You then have a chat with your home boy about the issue. Your friends fiance should have asked the two of you to leave when she was offended or just said we are going to bed. it appears your friend was there when the fight happened? He should not have let things get to a point in which they would get physical. The bottom line it does not matter what your girl friend said, who ever threw the first punch, slap or shove is in the wrong. No excuse to punch or hit someone out of anger. I can give a rather long list.. No offense this is ghetto, redneck or what ever the heck you want to call it.. Civilized adults do not do these kind of things. Fighting is only a means of defense. 1
beach Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 It's a long and miserable life if you settle for this brand of "sassy".
Dork Vader Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 Ouch. Straight to the point. I think the people that did this to her were trash and sloppy drunks. I guess she has a reputation for that looking back. My girlfriend talks back, is "sassy" so me thinking she is innocent is not possible. The time she was assaulted by her friend she didn't have a way to get back home and the other girl did antagonize her. I wasn't there but I know it was a bad situation. Still, putting herself in these situations and not exercising good judgement is my issue. I also asked her lets go home an hour earlier before this happened. And this is where intelligence comes into the mix. Why hang out with people who would get into physical altercations to begin with? I always leave my self a way out.. I've been in a handful of fights. but it is the last thing I want to do. I try to find an exit and get out of the situation. The few fights I've been in I had no way out or was trying to leave and got hit. Fighting just is not worth it.. Why risk seriously harming yourself over something stupid and petty? If you're a guy there is a bit more risk involved in fighting.. Especially if you're a big guy.. You punch someone hard enough and there is a good chance you can cause serious harm to the person you hit. Kill the person and you're going to jail no matter how justified the punch was. Seriously injure them you're going to jail.. Fighting just aint worth it man.. You're not getting paid, your not winning titles, you're not proving anything.. You're just making yourself look like a fool. 1
Author Biscous Posted May 11, 2015 Author Posted May 11, 2015 And this is where intelligence comes into the mix. Why hang out with people who would get into physical altercations to begin with? I always leave my self a way out.. I've been in a handful of fights. but it is the last thing I want to do. I try to find an exit and get out of the situation. The few fights I've been in I had no way out or was trying to leave and got hit. Fighting just is not worth it.. Why risk seriously harming yourself over something stupid and petty? If you're a guy there is a bit more risk involved in fighting.. Especially if you're a big guy.. You punch someone hard enough and there is a good chance you can cause serious harm to the person you hit. Kill the person and you're going to jail no matter how justified the punch was. Seriously injure them you're going to jail.. Fighting just aint worth it man.. You're not getting paid, your not winning titles, you're not proving anything.. You're just making yourself look like a fool. My girl didn't fight back. The fiancee I've known for 4 years and I have NEVER seen her attack someone. The fiancee has even been in an abusive relationship so she should know how traumatic that sort of stuff is. I train MMA, have done Muay Thai, Boxing, Wrestling and I try and defuse stuff personally because I know what could happen. I'm also 6'1'' 195 too and in good shape but still gotta be careful you don't know what will happen.
d0nnivain Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 So your sassy GF said something to a woman in that woman's home which caused that woman to physically attack your GF. You say the other woman had been drinking but your GF was sober. Does that mean your GF did not have any drinks or that she had fewer drinks then the homeowner? On top of this, you all work together. I do not think you should go crying to anybody's boss. This was a social thing not a work thing. You don't need to involve your employer. The night it happened, calling the police may have been an option but now after the fact unless your GF required significant medical care (more than a band-aid, aspirin or ice pack) it's a little late. Can't you just not socialize with these people outside of work?
Methodical Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 This didn't happen at work and it wasn't a work related function so your employer shouldn't be involved. You've known the fiancee 4 years and have never witnessed an altercation and yet your gf has been involved in at least two incidents within a few months, plus by your own admission she is sassy. Involving your employer might not bode so well for your girlfriend because management may pay closer attention to the people involved and her attitude and unbridled tongue could be taken as being confrontational, resulting in her termination.
Author Biscous Posted May 11, 2015 Author Posted May 11, 2015 So your sassy GF said something to a woman in that woman's home which caused that woman to physically attack your GF. You say the other woman had been drinking but your GF was sober. Does that mean your GF did not have any drinks or that she had fewer drinks then the homeowner? On top of this, you all work together. I do not think you should go crying to anybody's boss. This was a social thing not a work thing. You don't need to involve your employer. The night it happened, calling the police may have been an option but now after the fact unless your GF required significant medical care (more than a band-aid, aspirin or ice pack) it's a little late. Can't you just not socialize with these people outside of work? I don't socialize with them too much in general. It was supposed to just be a nice housewarming party. Luckily I work in a different department than both of them. No problem with me not socializing with them. My GF had fewer drinks that's what I'm saying. Yes talking to the boss may be a dicey situation and I agree. And it wasn't severe. She just had a headache and all but she is OK.
Diezel Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 Your girlfriend is going to be the kind of girl that will get you into trouble in the future. I hate situations like that, where you have to clean someone else's mess up.
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