brokengirl85 Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 Hi everyone, I broke with my ex almost 2 months ago. I've been dating (some good and some horrible experiences) but today I feel the urge to check on ex. I feel sad, thinking I may not find anyone else. We had a great connection. He left me (he said he was not in love with me) My specific question is this one: I don't know if he's dating someone else. I'm no contact, so I have no idea. I haven't checked his facebook account, I blocked him on phone and defriended him on Facebook, so I'm clueless. What I can't change is the hope he'll contact me again one day. If I check on him and discover he's dating someone else, I'll give up on hope, so I think it's a good idea. Should I or should I not? Please, I need your opinions. Thank you. I'm feeling awful today
ravfour4 Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 You need to think: "why do I want to contact him?" If the answer is because you're having a bad/lonely day, what type of response do you expect back? If he ignores you, won't it make your day worse? If he has some bland "ok, cool" response, would it do the same? If he responds nicely, will you hope he wants you back? If you're 100% prepared for no response, go for it. If not, and you're likely not given the fact you're having a bad day, I would resist. What would you say to him? I've felt this way before with my ex-gf and their response only gives you temporary relief, followed by greater sadness/loneliness.
Jimmyjackson Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 sleep on it, this urge will pass. You'll realise in a few hours it's not worth it and be glad you didn't check in. You know he doesn't love you anymore so it's pointless isn't it? Why seek validation from someone who no longer values you as a person?
Author brokengirl85 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Posted May 11, 2015 My question was whether I should check his status on facebook...I wasn't planning on contacting him. I just wanted to know if he is seeing someone else. I guess I will not check. Not worth it! Who cares, anyway, what he's doing with his life. He dumped me, so he can go f### himself thank you
Jimmyjackson Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 My question was whether I should check his status on facebook...I wasn't planning on contacting him. I just wanted to know if he is seeing someone else. I guess I will not check. Not worth it! Who cares, anyway, what he's doing with his life. He dumped me, so he can go f### himself thank you There might not be any trace of him seeing anyone on Facebook, even if he is? I seldom post on Facebook and plenty of others also keep their private lives to themselves. Even if you looked and he was seeing someone, so what? he dumped you, it doesn't change anything does it? The situation remains the same and you'll probably feel sad and want to contact him
na49 Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 Even if you looked and he was seeing someone, so what? he dumped you, it doesn't change anything does it? The situation remains the same and you'll probably feel sad and want to contact him If she looked, and ended up seeing him with his arm wrapped around another girl, she probably wouldn't want to contact him. She'd also have to accept the reality that he's gone because he's someone else's now. A lot of people have a hard time accepting that their ex is moving on (myself included) but seeing that they have actually moved on can help. 1
Author brokengirl85 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Posted May 11, 2015 If she looked, and ended up seeing him with his arm wrapped around another girl, she probably wouldn't want to contact him. She'd also have to accept the reality that he's gone because he's someone else's now. A lot of people have a hard time accepting that their ex is moving on (myself included) but seeing that they have actually moved on can help. correct. I need to give up hope, because my brain doesn't understand even though 6 weeks had passed. At this point, what should I do??? Check or not????
na49 Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 correct. I need to give up hope, because my brain doesn't understand even though 6 weeks had passed. At this point, what should I do??? Check or not???? Speaking from my own experience, when I confirmed that my ex DID leave me to be with her friend's brother (who was supposedly just a "friend") it really put more nails in the coffin. I saw all of our pictures (600+) were deleted from her Facebook, and she was writing all of the things she'd write about me, bragging about how "perfect" her boyfriend is, and how happy she is to have found the one she deserved. ... that guy ended up dumping her after a month, but that's a different story. Only you know what's best for you, and if you find out that he's single, it might just make you more curious. I think you should give yourself a few days, and see if your urge goes away. You might just be having a bad night.
Author brokengirl85 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Posted May 11, 2015 Speaking from my own experience, when I confirmed that my ex DID leave me to be with her friend's brother (who was supposedly just a "friend") it really put more nails in the coffin. I saw all of our pictures (600+) were deleted from her Facebook, and she was writing all of the things she'd write about me, bragging about how "perfect" her boyfriend is, and how happy she is to have found the one she deserved. ... that guy ended up dumping her after a month, but that's a different story. Only you know what's best for you, and if you find out that he's single, it might just make you more curious. I think you should give yourself a few days, and see if your urge goes away. You might just be having a bad night. wow, what a story. I'm glad the guy dumped her after a month. that should have felt awesome I'm giving myself a week. not ding anything tonight.
Recommended Posts