paradox Posted April 22, 2005 Posted April 22, 2005 A guy buys his gf presents (not that often, but does),calls her every day, takes her to fancy restaurants, has wild sex with her..for one year. In that year he never (and I mean never) says anything which would indicate his feelings for her (i.e "miss you", "can't wait to see you".,etc). What would you make out of that? I did try to inititiate it myself. Like few days ago I told him (in person) I missed him (we haven't seen each other for a week+few days) but he didn't say anything back.
HotCaliGirl Posted April 22, 2005 Posted April 22, 2005 Tell him that you miss hiim again, and then add "do you miss me too?!" or "are you looking forward to see me as much as I'm looking forward to see you?" He's got to answer something and that might break the ice for him to become more expressive verbally towards you. You can provide feedback by responding to him that it means a lot to hear him say that so it can reinforce him to say those things to you without your initation.
Merin Posted April 22, 2005 Posted April 22, 2005 Well while I can understand wanting to hear those words... I also believe that what people say means less than what people do... IF your BF is good to you (and it sounds like he is) and you FEEL cared for when you're with him then IMO those are good indicators of how he FEELS about you. He may be one of those guys who has a hard time saying how he feels.. but sometimes what words do not tell you actions do... Good Luck
Author paradox Posted April 22, 2005 Author Posted April 22, 2005 Thanks a lot for your advices!Merin I been thinking that as well. Just that sometimes it almost feels strange he's not saying anything nice, but as the hotgirl said I'll just try again and maybe gradually he'l learn how to do it In any way it will be good to see his reaction as well.
roxy_silver16 Posted April 23, 2005 Posted April 23, 2005 Sometimes I feel like my boyfriend is lacking in this respect too. I am a shy person in relationships and I have a hard time initiating cuddling, saying nice things, romantic gestures ect. Occasionally my boyfriend would say something in that direction but not much. But he is very good to me. I also learned that I need to put aside my inhibitions and TELL HIM flat out what I need. I need you to tell me you love me, that you miss me, because it makes me feel wanted, loved, cared for. If this is what you want and need, then he should provide this for you if he really wants to be with you. Otherwise, if your not satisfied and not getting the attention (as well as giving) then maybe you guys have two different views of how the relationship is. After I had a blunt, straight out talk with my boyfriend. Told him I loved him, cared for him, that I was happy but I would be happier if he would compliment me more, do more romantic things, and verbalize his feelings more, things gradually are looking up. I definieltey see an improvement. Hope my advice was helpful....
BigB Posted April 23, 2005 Posted April 23, 2005 Some of us guys just have a hard time talking about our feelings. Though I'd have no problem saying "I miss you too" If he show you that he loves you though his actions I wouldn't be too worried about it. But it's ok to tell him you want to hear about it once in a while. Is he shy?
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