Omg! I ran away from the first date today!!

May 9, 2015

Hello, I had a date tonight. I'm feeling terrible right now.

This guys pictures were good, he was attractive supposedly. We were going to a wine bar but I changed plans and told him to go to a restaurant because I was hungry, 15 min before we met.

Ok, we met and we walked to the restaurant. This guy was weird. He looked so insecure. We got to the restaurant and he waited for me to ask for a table (??) he was just standing smiling omg.

Ok we sat and he just stared at me without talking!! I was trying to decide what to eat and drink, he said nothing.

It was me asking him questions and he laughed at the most inappropriate moments plus he had one eye that twitched involuntary, he remembered of Hannibal lecter omg!!!!

We ordered and I was starting to look for an exit. The waitress brought the drinks, I sipped my mojito two times, looked at him, grabbed my purse, said I'm sorry and run away like crazy!!!

I felt bad for the guy but I blocked him. He was so creepy that scared me, he was handsome but something was completely wrong with him...

I felt sad right now. Can you share your worst dates too?

May 9, 2015

Wow what a horrible thing to do to another person. I mean, from what I can tell the only thing this guy did wrong was be really socially awkward but not have disclosed it on his profile. And instead of calling the date off or addressing it like an adult, you fled from his in his face and stiffed him with the tab. I'm sure that made him feel great and did wonders for his social awkwardness. Good job being a decent human being! Not.

May 9, 2015

I had a bad one a few months ago. There was a break in just around the corner where I lived, and as I live in a nice neighborhood and crimes are a rarity, a ton of people went out to watch the police do their thing. Some women with her two young kids starts talking to me and blatantly starts flirting. She wasn't even close to my normal type, but I'm 25 and just thought "huh cool this milf is totally hitting on me". She even asked me to walk her and her kids home then offered her number to me afterwards. We end up going to get dinner the next day. The dinner was horrible, like she barely talked the entire time, didn't ask me anything. I just spent the 45 minutes rambling about stupid ****. I'm thinking to myself, ok maybe she just wanted to skip dinner and get to the fun part. As the bill was coming I ask her "hey want to come watch a movie at my place" which she said sure to. I get up to go to the bathroom and come back to find her missing and the bill left fully to me. I send her a text saying its rude to not even say thanks when someone just bought you dinner. She replies "you're a total weirdo! Don't ever call me again!".

I just laughed my ass off and texted the story to my friends. I mean she was 15 years older than me and asked me out on a date! What did she seriously expect if not a hook up? lol

May 9, 2015

Edited. Was going to add that speaking about rude... Comment by mrin.

May 9, 2015

You felt primal danger and ran as opposed to fighting or being deer in headlights.

May 9, 2015

Wow what a horrible thing to do to another person. I mean, from what I can tell the only thing this guy did wrong was be really socially awkward but not have disclosed it on his profile. And instead of calling the date off or addressing it like an adult, you fled from his in his face and stiffed him with the tab. I'm sure that made him feel great and did wonders for his social awkwardness. Good job being a decent human being! Not.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention OP's post. Seriously, that guy will probably remember this night for the rest of his life. People who are socially awkward and have low self esteem like this guy sounds like, are incredibly sensitive to anything that can effect their all ready fragile ego's. No joke, he's probably curled up in his bed right now hating himself for being such a weird freak. The sad part is he probably isn't even mad at OP. He probably feels like such a loser that he only hates and blames himself right now.

May 9, 2015

Edited. Was going to add that speaking about rude... Comment by mrin.

Rude comment? OP I was calling you on the deplorable thing you did. You didn't ask how to make it right. You asked for us to share our bad date stories. I'm not interested in making you feel better by sharing a war story or two with you. If you would rather be interested in cleaning things up with yourself and the guy you just jacked over, then I'd be happy to chat.

May 9, 2015

Shame on you for running from him. That wasn't cool, and he prob was a nice guy even though he was "weird" by your standards. THAT BEING SAID, I've done the same thing with a girl a long time ago, and even though it was years ago, I still feel like a piece of crap for acting like that, and think about it time to time. I'm ashamed of myself, embarrassed, and you should be also. It really is heartless.

Next time, politely tell him either you aren't feeling it, or make an excuse and leave...running out like that prob really depressed him and killed any self esteem. People are who they are...they can't help it even when they want to.

I've been on the other side of the spectrum too, I'll tell you, the pain from someone disrespecting you like that takes a long time to recover from.

Don't let that happen again..again I've been on both sides, learn from it, and think about what you have done.

May 9, 2015

OP, I've had some awkward dates, but have never just run out like that. You should have made an excuse or something.

I think you should text the poor guy NOW and apologize, even lie if you have to. Anything to help bring him back up, as I'm sure he's at his lowest right now. Seriously. This is bad. I totally understand how uncomfortable you felt (I've been there), but to just leave? This definitely calls for damage control.

May 9, 2015

OP, one thing I didn't say, is you owe the guy a big apology. It's something you really need to do. He deserves at least that much. I promise you that you will look back someday and feel horrible about this, and even worse if you don't apologize. Just a simple, I'm sorry for the way I acted text or call. If I was him, I would feel really bad especially when he did nothing wrong besides him being himself. Good luck and sorry for how the date went.....

May 9, 2015

OP, I've had some awkward dates, but have never just run out like that. You should have made an excuse or something.

I think you should text the poor guy NOW and apologize, even lie if you have to. Anything to help bring him back up, as I'm sure he's at his lowest right now. Seriously. This is bad. I totally understand how uncomfortable you felt (I've been there), but to just leave? This definitely calls for damage control.

This can be completely cleaned up with a single text. The text is a lie about a horrible subject but it would work all around. OP wouldn't be thought of as a cruel person and the guy wouldn't feel like a freak...

Hey [guy's name]. I wanted to appologize and explain my behavior last night. Many years ago a really bad thing happened to me by someone I knew. I've spent years dealing with it. When I met your in person, I realized you have some mannerism that reminds me of him. It triggered me and I panicked. I am so sorry. You seem like a great guy and I wish you the best.

And then reblock him.

May 9, 2015

Well he told me he was in an open relationship and that his girlfriend asked him to sleep with other men and he could do the same with other girls. I just felt awkward.

He texted me and I said sorry to him.

I just run, I didn't feel safe. Something was clearly not fine with him. At all.

May 9, 2015

I've been on bad dates, really bad ones, but never felt I needed to run so desperately like in this one. His eyes were weird, honestly. I'm sorry for the guy, but at this point I think I runned for my life.

May 9, 2015

Wow. I did not see it being so extreme. No girls ever gave me training wheels, trial and error by fire. Thought if someone was as aquward to perhaps the point of frightening as OP date seemed to be...a graceful dinner would not magically give them social skills. Hell even a graceful exit could be misunderstood. Was the OP supposed to sleep with him as well to boost his self esteem? A sorry I ran out but don't want to be with you sorry text gonna help?

I can see where it's rude. Only I've also seen girls avoid guys that ended up having major mental issues. Committed and escape and stalking issues. So a bit of projection on my part there. Just worse things then walking out on a date have happened, such as flirting and walking out with someone else.

Walking out might be kick in balls guy needs. So did not talk, gave odd looks, laughed for no reason, couldn't order food even. The only thing I wonder is how old.

May 9, 2015

Now he's sending me emails. I forgot to block him there. Gezz it was not enough I blocked him from texting, now he wants to email too what a creep

May 9, 2015

Wow. I did not see it being so extreme. No girls ever gave me training wheels, trial and error by fire. Thought if someone was as aquward to perhaps the point of frightening as OP date seemed to be...a graceful dinner would not magically give them social skills. Hell even a graceful exit could be misunderstood. Was the OP supposed to sleep with him as well to boost his self esteem? A sorry I ran out but don't want to be with you sorry text gonna help?

I can see where it's rude. Only I've also seen girls avoid guys that ended up having major mental issues. Committed and escape and stalking issues. So a bit of projection on my part there. Just worse things then walking out on a date have happened, such as flirting and walking out with someone else.

Walking out might be kick in balls guy needs. So did not talk, gave odd looks, laughed for no reason, couldn't order food even. The only thing I wonder is how old.

Great job at taking a reasonable argument to have basic courtesies for fellow human beings, and twisting it into making us sound like we are telling her to sleep with him to make him feel better.

OP is obviously trying to justify it to herself at this point. I seriously doubt she was in "mortal danger" at any point of the date. If she was walking down a dark alleyway or sitting in his basement, sure, she could run away without a second thought. Too bad for her she was in a public restaurant, so she just ends up looking like an inconsiderate jerk.

May 9, 2015

Wasn't having an argument and only made a extreme example to express my perspective. Perhaps read the other sentences wrote and comprehend I acknowledged the rudeness expressed.....Maybe read where she sent him a text and kindly leave me the hell alone.....walks out.

May 9, 2015

Great job at taking a reasonable argument to have basic courtesies for fellow human beings, and twisting it into making us sound like we are telling her to sleep with him to make him feel better.

OP is obviously trying to justify it to herself at this point. I seriously doubt she was in "mortal danger" at any point of the date. If she was walking down a dark alleyway or sitting in his basement, sure, she could run away without a second thought. Too bad for her she was in a public restaurant, so she just ends up looking like an inconsiderate jerk.

Agreed. All that was required was about two sentences right before she stood to go to make this right. What is going on now is some sort of damage control justification

May 9, 2015

Wasn't having an argument and only made a extreme example to express my perspective. Perhaps read the other sentences wrote and comprehend I acknowledged the rudeness expressed.....Maybe read where she sent him a text and kindly leave me the hell alone.....walks out.

Yeah I know what you did. Its called making a straw man argument. You took our mild arguments then turned them into an extreme example, then used that extreme example to try and prove how wrong we are. Don't get mad because I called you on you BS.

May 9, 2015

Hmm I don't think its cool to change plans 15 minutes before lol. IF it was for drinks you need to make sure you eat beforehand. Guys aren't here to just feed your belly at your command OP.

It would have been more polite to excuse yourself due to the restroom, come back and say you had to leave for an emergency or something, and leave a bill to help cover the cost.

I don't blame you for bailing that sounds really weird, just be more graceful in the future. I have you pegged as a woman dating for a free meal.

Edit: Reading the rest of your posts it's probably good you bailed.

Edited May 9, 2015 by barcode88

May 9, 2015

Wow. I did not see it being so extreme. No girls ever gave me training wheels, trial and error by fire. Thought if someone was as aquward to perhaps the point of frightening as OP date seemed to be...a graceful dinner would not magically give them social skills. Hell even a graceful exit could be misunderstood. Was the OP supposed to sleep with him as well to boost his self esteem? A sorry I ran out but don't want to be with you sorry text gonna help?

I can see where it's rude. Only I've also seen girls avoid guys that ended up having major mental issues. Committed and escape and stalking issues. So a bit of projection on my part there. Just worse things then walking out on a date have happened, such as flirting and walking out with someone else.

Walking out might be kick in balls guy needs. So did not talk, gave odd looks, laughed for no reason, couldn't order food even. The only thing I wonder is how old.

I agree somewhat.

I'm more concerned the op expected the guy to feed her lol.

May 9, 2015

Hmm I don't think its cool to change plans 15 minutes before lol. IF it was for drinks you need to make sure you eat beforehand. Guys aren't here to just feed your belly at your command OP.

Yeah I noticed that too! No wonder the guy was thrown aback, not sure who was running the show now that OP changed the plan.

Especially if he was socially awkward.

May 9, 2015

Agreed. All that was required was about two sentences right before she stood to go to make this right. What is going on now is some sort of damage control justification

I agree. Still those guys with the twitchy eye and don't talk a a lot, they are much more likely to be one of those often rumored axe murderers that lurk for victims on online dating sites. Better to be rude & safe than sorry & dead. lol

May 9, 2015

I hope you hadn't ordered a meal and left him with a huge bill? The poor guy, I feel for him. Sounds like he was just really nervous. I've been similar to that on a date once where I just couldn't get any words out. I probably wasn't creepy though cause we ended up in a relationship haha.

But I can understand your point of view too, it is frustrating trying to do all the talking and you have to trust your gut. I agree with others, leave it at drinks in future and grab some takeaway on the way home, just in case you get into this situation again.

May 9, 2015

Had you just met him for a drink like you originally planned, you wouldn't have had to worry about talking for so long. But you changed it to dinner and he agreed. Since you decided to run our during the meal because you decided the guy wasn't your type, the very least you could have done is pay for these plans that you made.

I've had plenty of dates with guys who were awkward and shy and difficult to make conversation with. I never even considered doing something as rude as running out of a date because of it. Hopefully you'll learn from all the comments here and not do something like that again.

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Omg! I ran away from the first date today!!

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