Sunyata Posted May 2, 2015 Posted May 2, 2015 I'm new to dating despite being a month away from 30. I had my first relationship late in my 20's but that ended in December. So anyway, I went on my first real "date" about two weeks ago. With my first girlfriend I didn't have dating pressures, and all that. The day after the date, the girl texted me she had a good time. I texted back saying I had been a little shy, and she said she had a good time again, and that it was fine. Two days later I told her I'd like to take her out again, and to "let me know" (what she thinks, when she's available, etc). About five days went by and no response. After 5 days, I texted a specific time and place when I think we should grab some food and drinks, and a minute later she texted back "That would be nice." I texted back saying "Great! Sounds like a plan!" She texted back a smiley, and I responded to her smiley with a smiley. So anyway, a pretty simple conversation and now we're meeting up again apparently, assuming she doesn't cancel. What the **** just happened?
d0nnivain Posted May 3, 2015 Posted May 3, 2015 I'd like you to take you out again is akin to the old "I'll call you". Women correct interpret it as a throw away line the other person doesn't really mean because it is not specific. When you got specific -- date, time, place -- you got a quick enthusiastic response. Have fun on your date & stop texting. Start talking.
introverted1 Posted May 3, 2015 Posted May 3, 2015 Your first text was too vague and put her in the awkward position of not knowing whether you were letting her down gently or asking her to arrange a second date. When you followed up with a plan, she had something to actually respond to, and did. Enjoy your date! Sounds promising.
Author Sunyata Posted May 3, 2015 Author Posted May 3, 2015 Thanks, guys! Yeah, that's probably it. I feel foolish now for thinking about her so much the past week. I really needed to accept he may have liked me and asked her out again in a better fashion. I can see it better from her point of view. Any tips on what to do? Touch her leg? Make sure to hug her this time? I can't imagine going for a kiss, even though a 2nd date is probably a decent time to do it.
chantos Posted May 3, 2015 Posted May 3, 2015 Going for a kiss and getting shot down is far more attractive than not taking the chance. Roll your eyes playfully if she shoots you down. 1
TheFinalWord Posted May 3, 2015 Posted May 3, 2015 I'm new to dating despite being a month away from 30. I had my first relationship late in my 20's but that ended in December. So anyway, I went on my first real "date" about two weeks ago. With my first girlfriend I didn't have dating pressures, and all that. The day after the date, the girl texted me she had a good time. I texted back saying I had been a little shy, and she said she had a good time again, and that it was fine. Two days later I told her I'd like to take her out again, and to "let me know" (what she thinks, when she's available, etc). About five days went by and no response. After 5 days, I texted a specific time and place when I think we should grab some food and drinks, and a minute later she texted back "That would be nice." I texted back saying "Great! Sounds like a plan!" She texted back a smiley, and I responded to her smiley with a smiley. So anyway, a pretty simple conversation and now we're meeting up again apparently, assuming she doesn't cancel. What the **** just happened? In your first set of posts, you placed her on a pedestal as though you were not sure if you were worth her time. Second set of texts, you were more assertive. Good job. However, I recommend to cut the goofy smiles back and forth. Imagine it... Hi! Blah Just set the plan, and leave at that. She can still stand you up, so try not to get caught up in a fantasy already. Control your expectations and you will be fine.
Author Sunyata Posted May 3, 2015 Author Posted May 3, 2015 (edited) Yeah. I am going to try to think of something playful tomorrow. The first time we met up she texted me "Are we still on or are you going to chicken out?" Playful, fun. I am afraid of where it will go as she finds out more about me. I don't have a friend and she has a lot of friends she does stuff with. Oh well. Men aren't supposed to have friends. Edited May 3, 2015 by Sunyata
Author Sunyata Posted May 3, 2015 Author Posted May 3, 2015 I should have had to go through this when I was 16/17, ugh! I can't imagine escalating it like that. Her pulling back and slapping me, or being disgusted!
smackie9 Posted May 4, 2015 Posted May 4, 2015 Watch for her body language.....why is that so damn hard to figure it out??? If she finds ways to touch you, grab you, or lean in, or lean on you, she wants to get close to you....duh.
katiegrl Posted May 4, 2015 Posted May 4, 2015 In your first set of posts, you placed her on a pedestal as though you were not sure if you were worth her time. Second set of texts, you were more assertive. Good job. However, I recommend to cut the goofy smiles back and forth. Imagine it... Hi! Blah Just set the plan, and leave at that. She can still stand you up, so try not to get caught up in a fantasy already. Control your expectations and you will be fine. Oh good lord ...^^that was seriously funny.. LOL! And so true! I am still laughing, boyfriend thinks I am seriously whacked!
Author Sunyata Posted May 4, 2015 Author Posted May 4, 2015 (edited) Well she said tonight isn't going to work And asked if we can reschedule. No explanation. Going to remain optimistic since she suggested rescheduling. Got all happy for being wrong about my previous interpretation. We shall see if that stands. I guess just wait and see? Edited May 4, 2015 by Sunyata
Author Sunyata Posted May 4, 2015 Author Posted May 4, 2015 Is any form of rescheduling bad? I take it partly as a sign that she could be nervous the date will be awkward, etc, and doesn't have confidence that I'll have control. I dunno.
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