LookAtThisPOst Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 Well, I have to say, this is for the record books. A woman I had met a couple of years back at a friends birthday party I had only recently added her to Facebook and at THAT time, I didn't know we had met face-to-face...I had forgotten, so it was kind of like starting over. She was someone new that was just tagging along at the party. I would try to converse with her on Facebooks chat, but she was always in the middle of something (driving or traveling for work.) So I lost touch and just kept her as a friend online. Wasn't entirely sure if she was unattached at the time. Very recently, she popped up on OK Cupid, I contacted her there mentioning we were friends on Facebook and considering we already share a bunch of mutual friends, I asked her out for drinks in the first email. She said, "Sure, I would like to get together for drinks, here's my number......" and she gave me her number. This kind of pretty much defuncts a lot of those "You must do something to make your profile (or yourself rather) to appear more attractive to the opposite sex. This situation was effortless and defuncts having to "tweak" your profile. This happened to me a handful of times on occasion where a woman online was willing to meet me regardless of whatever tweaking I had done. So I'd advice tweak to a certain point and if it's still not working, just hope for the best and this kind of thing will happen. Though, you won't get 3 dates a week like some men tend to "brag" about on here. LOL...at least you'll get a few here and there. ;-)
Art_Critic Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 This kind of pretty much defuncts a lot of those "You must do something to make your profile (or yourself rather) to appear more attractive to the opposite sex. not sooo fast... You had met her before a couple of years ago and you were FB friends, consider that Ice Broken.. This is what they call an "in"
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted May 1, 2015 Author Posted May 1, 2015 (edited) not sooo fast... You had met her before a couple of years ago and you were FB friends, consider that Ice Broken.. This is what they call an "in" Not really, same thing happened with women I met strictly online. Also, even when I had an "in", there where times where the "Hey, I know you from Meetup! Let's get together" didn't work either. So it's moot. There's no argument for this. Edited May 1, 2015 by LookAtThisPOst
GemmaUK Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 She won't see any harm in it. It's not like you suggested a date, just drinks. She also clearly specified back that it was 'drinks' You have met, you are FB friends and both happen to be on a dating site. But she is not thinking you mean romantically as you haven't asked her on a date before and neither did you this time around.
Art_Critic Posted May 2, 2015 Posted May 2, 2015 Not really, same thing happened with women I met strictly online. Also, even when I had an "in", there where times where the "Hey, I know you from Meetup! Let's get together" didn't work either. So it's moot. There's no argument for this. Well.. they just weren't interested in you, that is why "in" failed.. in the case you posted about she is clearly interested in you and the "in" lowered her guard.
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted May 3, 2015 Author Posted May 3, 2015 She won't see any harm in it. It's not like you suggested a date, just drinks. She also clearly specified back that it was 'drinks' You have met, you are FB friends and both happen to be on a dating site. But she is not thinking you mean romantically as you haven't asked her on a date before and neither did you this time around. It is indeed a date, because after all we met on a 'dating site', perhaps just not YOUR definition of a "date." Leave it to "Gemma UK" to attempt to let the wind out of someone's sails.
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted May 3, 2015 Author Posted May 3, 2015 Well.. they just weren't interested in you, that is why "in" failed.. in the case you posted about she is clearly interested in you and the "in" lowered her guard. True, perhaps it did lower her guard, it's just pretty amazing a woman would give me her phone # without me having to ask. I can definitely get kudos for that. ;-)
GemmaUK Posted May 4, 2015 Posted May 4, 2015 It is indeed a date, because after all we met on a 'dating site', perhaps just not YOUR definition of a "date." Leave it to "Gemma UK" to attempt to let the wind out of someone's sails. Apologies, I must have misinterpreted your OP, you posted that you had met at a friend's birthday party, added her on FB not knowing you had met and then asked her for drinks on OKC. It's just an expectation thing re: drinks/date. If the word 'date' wasn't used then you can't guarantee that the other person knows it is meant as a date. In this case especially as you are FB friends and have also met face to face so it may not matter to her 'where' the question was asked. Plus if it were me and a guy had said to me he hadn't found any attraction with anyone he had met I would safely assume that meant me also (me being one of the people he has met) so I wouldn't read into it that he had any attraction for me and that it would just be friends going out for drinks. Also, if you go expecting drinks then you won't be disappointed if she doesn't see it as a date. If it turns into a date or a date follows on from it then great, if that doesn't happen then no harm done.
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