Funnester Posted April 30, 2015 Posted April 30, 2015 So... After 2 years of dating a girl I spent almost all of my time and effort on ended and I need help on what to do next because I still love and care for this girl more than anything. I bought a phone for her and pay for the service because her parents were divorced and she was always scared of her dad beating her or doing something crazy to her so I didn't want anything to happen to her so I bought her a phone to contact people and before this she had no way of contacting people besides a computer and asking to use her parents phones which she didn't always get to use. We broke up because she thinks she could be missing out on something in the world and she doesn't want to be "tied down" she wants to "meet" and "get to know" other guys but i am the sweetest guy she could ever ask for or any girl so she says and I'm amazing and perfect hmmm. Half of her family is moving to Texas so I thought it could be the stress and she could possibly come back to me after school is over with. But now she is talking to these guys and keeping her distance she said she wanted to still see me and do stuff with me while meeting with other guys which raises a red flag for me. Honestly I don't know what to do or how to act I love her but I can't see her with other guys any advice on what to do?
TunaCat Posted April 30, 2015 Posted April 30, 2015 She's trying to have her cake & eat it too. Show her you are not a doormat by going NC.
Author Funnester Posted April 30, 2015 Author Posted April 30, 2015 What do I do after the one month?
TunaCat Posted April 30, 2015 Posted April 30, 2015 What do I do after the one month? You don't do anything. There is no set timetable for NC. NC is used for you to heal, not for you to get her back. She clearly does not want to be with you. If she contacts you, the only time you answer her is if she says "I made a mistake and I want to work things out with you." Any other contact is simply breadcrumbs.
Holmes85 Posted April 30, 2015 Posted April 30, 2015 (edited) Funnster, I am going to offer you some advice that you are not going to like, but I can promise you one thing, that you WILL see results with it. First things first, stop talking to her, if you haven't wished her well, do it now and tell her you don't want to be a part of her life anymore. After that you "remove" her from everywhere. She would reach out to you in the beginning and throw breadcrumbs at you to see how you respond, you don't buldge, you don't give any reply, don't give into your emotions, don't reply to anything she sends you. As months go by, your emotional side would subside and you will start thinking logically on what she did to you and start to realize that what she's doing is unforgivable, she's basically saying "if it doesn't work out with the guys I date, I'll come back to you" making you her backup plan, which normally means that she would be with you for a while someone else picks up her interest and like a speeding bullet she would be gone again. As time passes and the honeymoon phase with her new fling is over, she would start throwing breadcumbs your way to see how you respond and where your head is at. You should be in strict No Contact with her to get yourself back on track. By the time she realizes that she's in a trainwreck with the new guy or the new guy starts messing up, she would automatically start thinking about you, weeks would go by and eventually fear would engulf her that you would might meet someone, that is when she will make her intentions clearer and by the time that happens, I really hope you don't care about her anymore andhave found someone who appreicates you for who you are and isn't looking left and right and saying "This looks way better than what I have right now". Edited April 30, 2015 by Holmes85 ! 2
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