smg15 Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 You look and see that she stated she has "No Kids" and then once you talk on the phone she reveals she does have kids? lol I mean what do women like that think they are going to accomplish by posting false information? Of course once it's revealed the guy is no longer going to be interested. I met this girl on POF and she waited to tell me over the phone that she has one kid and I had to end the conversation.
Buddhist Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Probably the same thing guys who post old photo's of themselves, lie abut their job, age or height, marital or relationship status and interests, are trying to accomplish.
Author smg15 Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 Probably the same thing guys who post old photo's of themselves, lie abut their job, age or height, marital or relationship status and interests, are trying to accomplish. Bout how can you lie about kids though?
carhill Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Every woman I dated or had a relationship, other than my exW, had children and none ever lied about kids. With some, appropriately, I either never met them or met them long down the road when we were in a relationship but it was always known they had them. In the case of the doctor I dated, she even mentioned her grandchildren and, yup, I met one of them. Don't know what to tell ya. Post 1995, every woman I dated came from OLD. Guess it's changed.
katiegrl Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 She meant she does not want the man to have kids. She has kids, and that is enough for her. She doesn't want to have to deal with a man's kids too.....
Author smg15 Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 She meant she does not want the man to have kids. She has kids, and that is enough for her. She doesn't want to have to deal with a man's kids too..... Why would a man without kids deal with a woman who already has kids?
SawtoothMars Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 You look and see that she stated she has "No Kids" and then once you talk on the phone she reveals she does have kids? lol I mean what do women like that think they are going to accomplish by posting false information? Of course once it's revealed the guy is no longer going to be interested. I met this girl on POF and she waited to tell me over the phone that she has one kid and I had to end the conversation. Not everybody puts a thousand hours into filling out those profiles. In fact, I'm pretty sure most people zoom through it as fast as possible. If she was straight up with you on the phone, maybe just give her the benefit of the doubt. If you don't want a single mom... then just be honest with her in return. My first profile, I accidentally put the wrong birth year down. I really didn't notice until somebody pointed it out.
carhill Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Why would a man without kids deal with a woman who already has kids? Can you re-phrase that? If the supposition is accurate, and frankly I don't believe it is, then the profile system has changed markedly. When I was doing OLD, it was 'has kids' (yes or no) and 'wants kids' (yes or no). Hence, if I viewed a profile which stated 'no' to 'wants kids' I moved on because I did want children. It didn't seem difficult. Have things changed that much?
Jessie1231 Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Why would a man without kids deal with a woman who already has kids? You do realize that not every man is like you right? Some men have different tastes and requirements. Some men without kids are fine dating women with kids. Some of your deal breakers are not deal breakers at all for others.
Gary S Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 She is her children's protector. She is under no obligation to tell a man about her kids until she has gotten to know a man well enough to see his character and form a good opinion of him. If a man does not like it, too bad so sad! The kids' safety comes first.
Author smg15 Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 She is her children's protector. She is under no obligation to tell a man about her kids until she has gotten to know a man well enough to see his character and form a good opinion of him. If a man does not like it, too bad so sad! The kids' safety comes first. Should men wait to reveal their last name and place of employment until he forms a good opinion of her?
Gary S Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Should men wait to reveal their last name and place of employment until he forms a good opinion of her? - Yes. I would not give that info out until you have met face-to-face and you get a good vibe from her. There are women who turn into stalkers.
carhill Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 OP, how often are you finding this to occur? I ask since you apparently only contact women who state they don't have children. Heh, I didn't run into one of those until I met my exW's profile in my late 30's. Everyone around here had kids by the time they were 21-22 or so. All my friends had toddlers by the time they were 25 at the latest. I wish you well!
Author smg15 Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 OP, how often are you finding this to occur? I ask since you apparently only contact women who state they don't have children. Heh, I didn't run into one of those until I met my exW's profile in my late 30's. Everyone around here had kids by the time they were 21-22 or so. All my friends had toddlers by the time they were 25 at the latest. I wish you well! This was something new that happened to me online. I never saw the word NO in the do you have kids section and then she reveals that she is a mom.
Buddhist Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Bout how can you lie about kids though? Believe it or not, people who prey on children for sexual gratification aren't above trolling the internet looking for likely leads. Single parents on dating sites.....easy prey.
Author smg15 Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 Believe it or not, people who prey on children for sexual gratification aren't above trolling the internet looking for likely leads. Single parents on dating sites.....easy prey. Seems like it would be easier to go to single parent meet dating site and she would not have to lie.
Buddhist Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Seems like it would be easier to go to single parent meet dating site and she would not have to lie. Seems like you just want to justify in your head that she is somehow a sneaky schemer.
carhill Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 This was something new that happened to me online. I never saw the word NO in the do you have kids section and then she reveals that she is a mom. OK, so it's new. Stuff happens. Billions more in the world to meet. I ache to have had this kind of setback when dating for nearly 20 years. Seriously. It's all about perspective. One day you'll laugh about this stuff, though apparently not while bouncing your grandson on your knee. Fair enough. Enjoy life though. The woman who fibbed about having kids can't control that part. You're in charge.
Clarence_Boddicker Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 There's nothing wrong with a ready made family. I wouldn't turn down someone I was attracted to just because she has kids.
Omei Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 (edited) Why would a man without kids deal with a woman who already has kids? Im a woman with a child, but no other partner not even an ex involved so I still have a very real chance to still, and do get men without children. I have no idea why men without children date me from what I know is some men are drawn to woman with mothering qualities. Ive asked men before and usually the answer is because were woman who know how to care for others, selfless, mature, ready to settle down without guessing ive heard various reasons. They all liked children in general was the most common. Edited April 28, 2015 by Omei
carhill Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 This was something new that happened to me online. I never saw the word NO in the do you have kids section and then she reveals that she is a mom. Ha, reading my last post I found an incongruity I overlooked in your quote, specifically where you put 'never', as in you never saw a 'no' regarding children in the profile. If that wasn't an error in posting on your part, it does open up a further discussion of what you actually did see
losangelena Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 OP, I'm curious to hear your take on an ideal mate. Because so far this week, you've ruled out women who need walking support and those with children. Furthermore, why do you think these things are dealbreakers to everyone? I would not rule out a man who had kids. When you get to a certain age, you have to start considering these things. Why she failed to state it correctly on her OLD profile is a fair question, but alas, only one that she can accurately answer. It's generally never a good move to lie about anything on your OLD profile, because then you're meeting people based on false assumptions. Eventually, someone's going to find out. Right now, I can't tell if you're more bothered by the infraction (kids, canes) or because they didn't tell you ahead of time. Which is it?
SunnySide0418 Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 I have 2 young kids - 7 and 5. I do online dating and would never lie about not having them. I know not everyone will want to date me because of that and truthfully I wouldn't want to date someone who isn't OK with it. It is what it is and we're a package deal.
Redhead14 Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 You look and see that she stated she has "No Kids" and then once you talk on the phone she reveals she does have kids? lol I mean what do women like that think they are going to accomplish by posting false information? Of course once it's revealed the guy is no longer going to be interested. I met this girl on POF and she waited to tell me over the phone that she has one kid and I had to end the conversation. I bet she gets more responses by saying she has no kids. When she does finally have contact, she decides whether she will reveal that information based on the "vibe" she gets from the man. If she likes him enough at that point, she'll keep that information to herself until he gets a little more invested. When she thinks he's pretty much hooked, she'll tell him and hope he decides to overlook it. Or, if she doesn't really like him, she'll tell him to see if he runs or hopes he will. It's an immature approach but I bet it does work sometimes.
smackie9 Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Fact: there are women that do not reveal that they have kids to increase their odds attracting men. And yes there are men out there that will not date single moms. I do not know the numbers on how many do this, or how many men find kids a deal breaker BUT I agree it is pointless to lie about something like that......truly there is nothing to be gained by it. As for sexual predators..... always take the time to at least do a background check.
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