SweetLikeCinnamon Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 (Really sorry that this is an essay but would really appreciate if you could read if you have the time). Really can’t figure out if this guy likes me so just need an objective option. I’m 23 and he’s 21. We're in the same university society. He’s not the player type nor someone who is the type to be confident when it comes to girls. I’ve already made a couple of threads about this guy but I’ll try to paraphrase. Here's on overview. Background: - So I had never spoken to this guy and just knew his face and thought he was really attractive but assumed he wouldn’t like me, so didn’t dwell on it - At the beginning of this academic year we both attend an event where we literally exchange a few words (he asked if I was okay when some guy was trying to get with me). We get tagged in same picture so decided to add him without really thinking - For the next couple of months he comments on my status fairly with pointless things/jokes but don’t think much of it as I assume he does it with everyone in our society. I also notice him stare at me when I enter our societies’ club nights on a couple of occasions but just still assume he couldn’t like me (I had seen a couple of girls flirt with him but he’s never been interested so assumed it would be the same with me) - For some random reason I decide to add him to ‘close friends’ on Facebook and then subsequently get to see his activity find out that he barely comments on anyone and I’m probably one of the top 5 people he comments on, despite the fact he barely know me and we have 40 mutual friends who more than half of them he knows way better than me. I then start to entertain him and comment on him as well Last couple of months: - It's our society club night. We don’t talk much per say but seems attentive to me, eg, giving me my bag when he knows I’m looking for it, staring at me. At one point when I’m walking around the dancefloor he calls my name to dance with him and his group. When I got next him we both get tense and his friend on the other side says to him ‘put your arm around her’. A bit later I’m sat with another guy and 'guy I like' is sat on the same table at the other side of me. Other guy is asking why I don’t have a boyfriend when I could have anyone I like and then ‘guy I like’ butts in convo and defends me and says to guy he shouldn’t ask personal questions etc. Other guy later points to ‘guy I like’ and asks ‘how about him, is he your type?’, I get awkward but guy I like seems happy about convo - A group of us from my society have an event to go to pubs and then a club. I get to the last pub early and am waiting for everyone. Guy I like finally comes in and shouts my name a few times excitedly (I don’t recognise him cause he’s wearing a hat). I tell him that and he jokes about it and we talk awkwardly until we find the rest of the group and disperse. During the club night I get a lot of unwanted attention and guy I like always has a go at them/gets rid of them. We don’t talk much though cause it’s really loud and we’re just dancing as a group. During the night I bump into him on the stairs and he says ‘Hey!’ happily when he sees me and the first thing he asks is what was going on with some guys that were talking to me. We talk on the stairs for a couple of minutes until we get old off for obstructing. After the club we walk back to town together. We have general chit chat. He mentions that guys bothering me must ruin my night. He shows off about getting rid of one guy in particular but says he doesn’t think I saw, so was obviously wanted me to notice. He then complains about drunk girls and I said I stopped drink early and he said that he noticed. We part with him asking if I’ll be at our society club night in 2 days (in a way which seemed to mean he wanted me to be there), then says get home safe. He comments on my status the next day with a cute/jokey comment. Society club night 2: Two days after the last club night. This is where things get bad. From the start he seems reluctant to say hi to me and is abrasive when I try to talk to him. I was really upset and thought I had done something wrong or he thought I did. I decide to give him space and then he doesn’t comment for a while either. The next time I see him is at a social where I also am happening to do a speech to join committee. He doesn’t maintain eye contact the whole night (I did catch him looking but he would look away fast). One time I was talking to someone else about my speech and he’s there as well and says that no one else is running for that position so I shouldn't worry and it'll be fine. There are other times when we’re in a large group and I would say something to someone else (not addressing him at all ) and he would respond to me but without looking at me. But generally isn’t attentive to me. -After a couple of weeks he goes back to normal and starts commenting jokey/nice stuff on my statuses again. Then when I see him at the next society club night he says hi like before. Though I spend most of the night talking to a guy (who I see as a friend) but I felt like the guy I like may have been bothered as he was hovering looking unhappy, and then left early after asking me if my coat was near him when I was still talking to guy. -I see guy I like at another night. He says hi to me enthusiastically but gives the guy I’ve come with (a friend) a long stare (he doesn’t like this person). Guy I like gets ill this night and spends whole night in bathroom. I message him to see if he’s okay. He doesn’t ‘see’ message for a few days but when he does he doesn’t reply but comments on my Facebook status instead. The last 10ish days: We both get chosen to do guest list duty for our club night. I message him beforehand asking what time I need to get there (as I'm new to it) and he messages back very ‘professionally’ so I’m worried about him being cold again. But when I get there he is ridiculously warm and attentive from when he sees me. This is the first time we’ve actually spend actual alone time together and it went really well. He laughed at all my jokes and the conversation flowed well and he asked lots of questions which he didn’t need to ask. He remembered stuff about me and held onto things I said/repeated them. At one point a girl was rude to me and I told him and he got really angry. Then later when I told others (not addressing him) he kept saying he’s sure it’s not as bad as I think and then made jokes about how I can get her back. He asked if anyone had written on my hand (we had to write on people hands for them to get in) and I said no so then he writes the club initial on my hand which happens to be my initial and then says ‘E* . .for *my name*’ after he’s written it, which seemed intimate to me. We get onto to borderline teasing territory but the shift is only 3o minutes so things couldn't develop fully. But once we get into the club night I felt too awkward to talk to him as it’s busy and loud and a big space and has 100 other people there I know, so if I wanted to talk to him I’d literally have to walk over to him and shout in his ear. He doesn’t talk to me either but don't know if he just feels awkward like I do -The next day he invites to an event (on Facebook) that’s on at the university. He only invites about 12 others who are mainly his very good friends. I put myself down as a maybe but the event gets a cancelled. After the whole guest list thing he also comments starts commenting on *most* of my posts and I basically become the person he comments on most, going by his activity page. -A few days later (last Tuesday) there is a committee meeting and we both happen to be a part of it now. I’m surprised to see him there cause on our guest list shift he tells me he never goes to it as he doesn’t see the point and doesn't like it. But I’m now new to the committee so have to go. When I get there he clocks me straight away and stares at me as I walk over to the group. No one is talking so I don’t say anything and just sit down and wait for the meeting to start. During the meeting he locks eyes with me a few times. As I’m leaving he’s talking to two friends and basically one friend asks me something and he answered before me as he knew the answer, (he remembers things about me, not that I had mentioned that thing). I then felt like I could have been friendlier at the meeting so comment on his status to show I’m not ignoring him. He then comments on both my statuses the next day. One comment was him making a joke /teasing about what I had said then linking me to a YouTube channel that he said I should watch over the weekend as I had nothing to do. I responded a couple of days later (yesterday) and then he private messages me (for the first time) telling me other videos I should watch. I respond about the videos but the convo didn’t go further than that. Though not sure if I should have asked follow up questions or not, as I wasn’t sure if he just solely wanted to show me the videos. So yeah, really can’t tell if he could be interested of if he’s just being friendly. Or why he's seemingly hot and cold. And any tips to progress things if you think he is interested? Thanks
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 He sounds interested in you, the question is whether he is going to man up and ask you out. Good luck!
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Although I failed to mention, he could be interested in you only as a friend. Is he a shy type OR is he very outgoing and smooth with Women? If he's shy he might be just working up the courage to ask you out, but if he's the latter type he probably just likes you as a friend.
Author SweetLikeCinnamon Posted April 27, 2015 Author Posted April 27, 2015 Although I failed to mention, he could be interested in you only as a friend. Is he a shy type OR is he very outgoing and smooth with Women? If he's shy he might be just working up the courage to ask you out, but if he's the latter type he probably just likes you as a friend. No he's not the type who's confident with women at all. I don't even think he's had a proper girlfriend before from what I know (also doesn't seem to do one night stands as he's quite religion and I've never seen him with a girl in that way)
Author SweetLikeCinnamon Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 More opinions would be great
katiegrl Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 It's hard to know for sure, but if it were me, I would assume he sees me only as a friend, and act accordingly... I could be wrong of course...but that's what I'm getting.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 OP he might be too shy to make a move. If you REALLY like this guy, maybe you could ask him if he wants to get coffee sometime and see how that goes? Otherwise you just have to wait and see
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