Always unlucky love. Now can't get over the one who used me as his rebound

[Lonely hearts]

So through here I realize that I definitely was the rebound. Once again though I asked questions and thought I was being smart and he seemed open and so into me. It all truly felt like the best time of my life. Maybe I was starving for some love. My ither relationships were with the addict, the emotionally unavailable one, the narcissist. These all cause me much grief as well, but I knew what was wrong with them and the relationship went bad before it was over.

This was a total blindside and I really fell for everything this guy was. Personality, manner, looks, same interests, funny, very respectable and interesting job, cool friends....the way he made me feel. It's too much for me to handle right now. I try but can't get his face or his touch out of my head. To FINALLY feel like you have it all just to get it ripped away so fast. God, I hope it goes away soon it's killing me. When will I stop thinking about him, and feeling so empty and sad. And I just burst into tears at the thought of going back to my single life. I'm so done with it. I have friends and family but I'm lonely as hell and nothing felt better than what I had that short time with him. I tired of dating. I've been on soooo many before him and it's just frustrating and I never feel a connection of any sort. I hate this.

How long till he's not the first thing in my brain?? I want to stop hoping amd wishing to hear from this guy who essentially used me. I don't think it was on purpose but he went all in and was wonderful and just woke up one day and said nope. Dying here. My friend is coming tonight to make me dinner and hang out and I can't even feel excited about that. I feel nothing but sadness right now.

Edited April 24, 2015 by Lonely hearts

[Lostrabbit]

Sorry to hear your story it sounds like a carbon copy of mine,

after a traumatic breakup in December I met a guy through a mutual friend in February, he had also been through the break up of a long term relationship a month previous to mine. We hit it off and were inseparable, he was very persistent and attentive, he swept me off my feet. I was unsure but we had talked about our break up experience and it seemed we wanted the same things and valued the same things.

 

For 7 weeks it was perfect I met all of his friends and family and he would talk about our future. He made some pretty big gestures and actions which made me think he wanted a real relationship- he was driving this. More recently He had a lot going on with the sale of his house with his ex and some animosity about it and he said he felt down about it I told him I was there for him but I put some of what was pulling back to down to this. However although he seemed to be pulling back he then did things which contradicted this- talking about us getting a dog and making plans for the future.

I was worried about him and I started to feel insecure when he continued to pull back I spoke to him and he reassured me it was not to do with us and that he was really happy with me it was just the other stuff. I tried to be patient and understanding.

 

Anyways after 9 weeks in total he decided he didn't know what he wanted, wasn't ready for a relationship and needed to be on his own but he didn't think it was the end. Unfortunately we had both been drinking when we had this conversation after being out separately with friends I text him two days later expressing that I felt bad our last conversation had been whilst drunk and would like to talk sober- no response. I am left feeling hurt confused and cast out.

 

I have not contacted him since, but I know he has been on dating websites as I accidentally found him (I was using a fake profile to see what else was around)

I feel the same- I am so disappointed that he gave up- all I tried to do was care for him and like you just wish we could discuss starting over and slowing down as even he admitted we were great together. That was a week ago- I have faught the urge to contact him so many times. I just feel cast aside and helpless.

What we have to remember is we will be ok. If they don't know what they want they have to figure it out and figure out if it's us or not but I know you want to make it clear that you would slow down. I think the hard thing is I really wanted to be with him and wanted it to work I finally thought my luck was changing and I could be happy again.

Try and has some hope and faith (I'm trying too) that if it was meant to be it will. Chin up