melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 I feel kind of silly posting about this I must admit, but I am curious for opinions, so I'm sucking it up. So, I have an incredibly adorable, sexy, sweet guy in my communications class. Up until a few weeks back I was in the early stages of a relationship with a guy long-distance, so I never really talked to him. If anything, sort of avoided it because I am so incredibly attracted to him. There have been a few signs thrown my way that have made me think he's interested in me; or at least attracted to me. -walking out of class, he was behind me and his friend was in front of us by the door. His friend is looking at me as I pass by him and then joins cute guy behind me heading out the door. Cute guy says "I know, we have some beautiful women in this class, right?" I continue walking and ignore the comment because I am slightly shy about my attraction toward him and I have a boyfriend at the time. -He slightly does the same thing the following week. I am exiting the classroom, I walk past him and his friend and he says "jesus, man, the women in this class!" I once again ignore it and continue walking...bitchy? -I am walking down the hall out of the classroom and I walk by him, he looks at me, smiles, says "hi...have a great day". I smile, say hello, you have a good day too, and continue walking. -I walk into class late while the professor is lecturing and sit behind cute boy. He turns around, smiles, and says good afternoon. I smile and say good afternoon to him too then rummage in my backpack. I think he was trying to make conversation or at least show interest in me but all these times I was with someone so I very blatantly brushed it off. He hasn't really initiated anything in a couple weeks and I'm afraid I may have just come off as a cold biatch to him....I'm also sort of shy because I have a crush on him. My question: would it be too bold of me to just approach him after class, make small talk, tell him I think he's cute and give him my number?
El Pallasso Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 My question: would it be too bold of me to just approach him after class, make small talk, tell him I think he's cute and give him my number? Unless I'm mistaken, you said you were in a relationship. Last I checked, that's cheating...
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 I said up until a few weeks ago I was in a relationship....meaning I am now single.
Clarence_Boddicker Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 No. If he has issues with it, that's his loss.
Hawaii51 Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 Bolder the better. Many a man will be refreshed, if not taken back, by those sorts of tactics. BUT!!! What's good for the goose is good for the gander, so don't come with some lame ****, alright?
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 BUT!!! What's good for the goose is good for the gander, so don't come with some lame ****, alright? I'm unsure what that means, Hawaii...
Hawaii51 Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 I'm unsure what that means, Hawaii... I know, sweetheart, I know. 2
gaius Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 Since you brushed him off before feel free to go up and talk to him, even drop it into conversation that you broke up with your boyfriend, but don't give him your number without him asking. There's always people around here giving advice that you should do all the work, because they think that's what they want a girl to do with them, but it always ends up being a disaster for the woman if she takes that advice. =/ 2
elaine567 Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 Just start speaking to him gradually as if he was another girl in the class you wanted to get to know better. Conversation is just conversation, why would you feel the need to brush him off? Stop the drama. No-one decent really likes cold b*tches blowing hot and cold. I personally wouldn't rush from small "good afternoons" to giving him your number. Just be friendly, he will get there eventually, if he is interested. 1
d0nnivain Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 My question: would it be too bold of me to just approach him after class, make small talk, tell him I think he's cute and give him my number? Yes, that is bold. Whether it's too bold, is up to him. Personally I would not do it. What I would do, is walk up to him & ask to borrow his notes. Then after the next class ask if he wants to study together. While you are studying casually mention that you are now single. Find out his status & flirt with him. He should be able to figure out that it's now OK to ask you out. If that doesn't work, mention a party or other event you will be going to; suggest he stop by. 2
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 Just start speaking to him gradually as if he was another girl in the class you wanted to get to know better. Conversation is just conversation, why would you feel the need to brush him off? Stop the drama. No-one decent really likes cold b*tches blowing hot and cold. I personally wouldn't rush from small "good afternoons" to giving him your number. Just be friendly, he will get there eventually, if he is interested. I was also thinking about the just gradual speaking approach!! Not sure where there was drama present. I was taken as well as shy so I naturally responded to that. Was not grandiose or dramatic in the least. 1
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 Yes, that is bold. Whether it's too bold, is up to him. Personally I would not do it. What I would do, is walk up to him & ask to borrow his notes. Then after the next class ask if he wants to study together. While you are studying casually mention that you are now single. Find out his status & flirt with him. He should be able to figure out that it's now OK to ask you out. If that doesn't work, mention a party or other event you will be going to; suggest he stop by. See, to me, that's just the awkward, round-about way of telling him I think he's cute. There are loads of other people I could ask for notes, for instance, the girl I sit next to every day and speak to. Plus, this class isn't really the type of class where there are notes or studying involved, it's an incredibly easy, laid back class. I do agree that a more subtle approach is wise and that maybe I should just gradually start talking to him, like Elaine has mentioned. (If I can stop being shy)
carhill Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 See also this thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/525627-what-would-guy-really-think-if-woman-asked-him-out-date 1
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 See also this thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/525627-what-would-guy-really-think-if-woman-asked-him-out-date I stumbled upon that thread last night and read some of it! There are a lot of mixed views on whether it's "acceptable" for a woman to approach a man. I still like for a man to approach me and have never been one to initiate, so I'm sure I'll stick with that. But I'm just feeling eager and overzealous about getting this cute guy to take me on a date 1
carhill Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 My best advice would be to appear open and interested and make yourself socially available. Most younger sexually active heterosexual guys will walk right through that door. Since you're in school, this is easy. Schools have social areas. Take it from there.
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 My best advice would be to appear open and interested and make yourself socially available. Most younger sexually active heterosexual guys will walk right through that door. Since you're in school, this is easy. Schools have social areas. Take it from there. That is good advice and that's what I'm thinking I will do. I am just a tad impatient
jen1447 Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 My question: would it be too bold of me to just approach him after class, make small talk, tell him I think he's cute and give him my number? Absolutely not. Just do it MissaMissa! 1
Phoe Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 I personally have never had an approach go well. About a dozen, and they were all rejected. That being said, if you believe it's something you can make work for you, you should go for it. Some women do great with approaching and can really make it work for them. I'm just not one of them. If nothing else, I'd say if you've never approached before, that you might consider at least giving it a try! Even if it doesn't work, you can look back and be glad that you tried something new.
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 Absolutely not. Just do it MissaMissa! My family calls me missa! I'm still considering it, but am also considering the tact of just starting casual conversation and flirting, I think he would ask me out himself if I did. Before I just have off the very obvious i am taken attitude. If he doesn't ask me out by the end of the semester, it's boldness time. He's too cute to pass up 1
Author melissacus Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 I personally have never had an approach go well. About a dozen, and they were all rejected. That being said, if you believe it's something you can make work for you, you should go for it. Some women do great with approaching and can really make it work for them. I'm just not one of them. If nothing else, I'd say if you've never approached before, that you might consider at least giving it a try! Even if it doesn't work, you can look back and be glad that you tried something new. I've never done it, I might be a little too sensitive to handle the possible rejection,
Phoe Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 I've never done it, I might be a little too sensitive to handle the possible rejection, Aww, I can understand. I've found it stings much less when you've done it spur of the moment rather than when I've thought it out before doing it. One thing's for sure, at least after being rejected I could stop wondering "what if" and get on with life, lol.
devilish innocent Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 You say you're thinking of moving things all the way forward because you're too impatient. Yet, it doesn't sound like you've done anything yet. Just start somewhere. Smile. Say hello. Ask how he's doing. You've got nothing to lose. Anything you do to approach him renders you more of a chance than sitting around doing nothing. You can always progress things further after the first step, but at least start somewhere. I took the initiative in showing interest in a couple of guys I liked when I was in college, and I never regretted it. One of them ended up being really into me for a while. The other one was a polite rejection, but at least I didn't have to wonder about him anymore. 1
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted May 10, 2015 Posted May 10, 2015 i'm sure there has to be some successful relationships that blossomed out there in which the woman was the initiator, she either approached the guy first or asked him out first, etc.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted May 10, 2015 Posted May 10, 2015 Is it lost on everybody else but me that this was in/from communications class?? (maybe await the end of the semester, when you'll be better equipped to make the move) 2
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