Satu Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 I do take fault in that and I sure do regret it because I can listen sincerely but for some odd reason, I just didnt want to I guess and it cost me. There will be other opportunities. Don't be pessimistic. Life goes on.
Author Calidude6 Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 There will be other opportunities. Don't be pessimistic. Life goes on. Indeed and my mind tells me that all the time but my heart doesn't like to hear that which takes over my mind at times. It's been 2 months and still hurts but I know things will get better with her or without her. I just didn't want her to give up on me or us but I understand if she never try's with us again. Life does go on and things will come around as well
acrosstheuniverse Posted April 24, 2015 Posted April 24, 2015 - Oh my gosh, if only women would do that and say, "My love level is dropping for you, here's why, let's fix this". That's what my current boyfriend says now and then... if I ever lose feelings for him he wants me to tell him asap so he can work out how to fix it and keep me. So sweet. I don't think it always takes two, no. I was left outta the blue by a two year partner I lived with end of 2012. I don't know why, didn't find out for a year, he wouldn't say, just said it was over. When I saw him again he just said 'it was me not you... but I just didn't feel loved anymore. You know things weren't good between us towards the end' which was crazy cos to me they felt fantastic, and there was him plotting to leave cos he didn't feel loved, all the while telling me we were fine and making love to me. Bonkers, ripped me to pieces for a while. Maybe I was doing something to make him feel not loved but how could I possibly be psychic and reach into his mind and realise he wasn't happy if he wouldn't tell me and didn't show signs? It nearly destroyed me and it was only a two year relationship. I've heard of people whose spouses of decades have got up and walked out randomly one day, I can't even imagine that level of pain. If he had had any interest in staying with me, he'd have told me he wasn't happy so we could work on it. He didn't so he obviously wanted out. If he'd told me we could have tried to fix it, if I'd refused to listen or try then yes, it'd be my 'fault' too. Sometimes relationships just end and it really is just the doing of one person unfortunately. But that's relationships. They have to be entered into and maintained freely and voluntarily and willingly. I would never want to be with someone staying with me out of duty. I would much rather someone be able to get up and walk away and leave us both free to find more suitable partners than live a lie.
Author Calidude6 Posted April 24, 2015 Author Posted April 24, 2015 That's what my current boyfriend says now and then... if I ever lose feelings for him he wants me to tell him asap so he can work out how to fix it and keep me. So sweet. I don't think it always takes two, no. I was left outta the blue by a two year partner I lived with end of 2012. I don't know why, didn't find out for a year, he wouldn't say, just said it was over. When I saw him again he just said 'it was me not you... but I just didn't feel loved anymore. You know things weren't good between us towards the end' which was crazy cos to me they felt fantastic, and there was him plotting to leave cos he didn't feel loved, all the while telling me we were fine and making love to me. Bonkers, ripped me to pieces for a while. Maybe I was doing something to make him feel not loved but how could I possibly be psychic and reach into his mind and realise he wasn't happy if he wouldn't tell me and didn't show signs? It nearly destroyed me and it was only a two year relationship. I've heard of people whose spouses of decades have got up and walked out randomly one day, I can't even imagine that level of pain. If he had had any interest in staying with me, he'd have told me he wasn't happy so we could work on it. He didn't so he obviously wanted out. If he'd told me we could have tried to fix it, if I'd refused to listen or try then yes, it'd be my 'fault' too. Sometimes relationships just end and it really is just the doing of one person unfortunately. But that's relationships. They have to be entered into and maintained freely and voluntarily and willingly. I would never want to be with someone staying with me out of duty. I would much rather someone be able to get up and walk away and leave us both free to find more suitable partners than live a lie. I do take responsibility and blame for not truly listening to her concerns and change like I said I would. I would change for like a week but get right back to that comfort zone. It was the little things I did at the start of the relationship I kind of stopped doing and giving her more affection. I'm just glad we didn't have a bad relationship or end it on bad terms because months or years we can run into each other and still have that attraction with each other. For now, just have to make sure I don't make that same mistake with the next person or if it's her. Have to progress and not regress. I do hate myself for my mistakes but I know it's a learning experience but I should of known which is why it eats me everyday. Easily fixable and I didn't do my part.
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