strawberryshortstack Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I had a first date with a guy today, and we both enjoyed it. At the end, I hugged him, and gave him a quick goodbye kiss. I've never done that before, but since I'd had such a great time, and found him very attractive, it felt like the right thing to do. However, being the overthinker that I am, I'm now wondering if I should have done it. He texted me almost immediately to thank me for the kiss, so there's really no good reason for me to be doubting my choice, but I can't help myself. Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 Spontaneous happy gestures are delightful. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
fitnessfan365 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 Good for you girl! Although I'm not a big fan of him "thanking you" for the kiss because it comes off like it doesn't happen to him very often. Haha But that's awesome you took initiative. I don't think women realize how nerve wracking going for a first kiss is. I mean I can be 99% sure she wants me to kiss her, but there is still that small two second window where I'm making myself completely vulnerable. Luckily I've only been cheeked twice in my life. However, getting rejected like that in such a vulnerable moment is so brutal. If I really enjoyed a woman's company on a first date and she beat me to the punch kissing me first, that's more than fine. The ONLY first kiss turn off I have is when a woman shoves her damn tongue down my throat. I love to make out as much as the next guy. But not on a first kiss. Soft, slow, romantic, and a hint of tongue if she initiates is perfect. I went out with one woman where the first date was good and she subtly says 'I had such a lovely time tonight". So I take this as a green light to kiss her. The second I do, her tongue is searching for my tonsils. Little did she know I had them out when I was 19. But since there is no non awkward of saying "you're a bad kisser" I sent her a text the next day and said that I'd decided to focus on another woman I'd been dating. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
DoesntGetIt Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 For me, everything a woman initiates instead of waiting/forcing the guy to do it is not only good, but is a turn on. Good for you for going after what you wanted and not being afraid to put yourself out there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I had a first date with a guy today, and we both enjoyed it. At the end, I hugged him, and gave him a quick goodbye kiss. I've never done that before, but since I'd had such a great time, and found him very attractive, it felt like the right thing to do. However, being the overthinker that I am, I'm now wondering if I should have done it. He texted me almost immediately to thank me for the kiss, so there's really no good reason for me to be doubting my choice, but I can't help myself. It's perfectly fine. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 As a guy, I love this. It only gets me more turned on and interested. I like girls who are different. Not like other girls. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
MrMeh Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 Nothing turns me on more than a girl knowing what she wants and being assertive about it! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author strawberryshortstack Posted April 22, 2015 Author Share Posted April 22, 2015 Good for you girl! Although I'm not a big fan of him "thanking you" for the kiss because it comes off like it doesn't happen to him very often. Haha But that's awesome you took initiative. I don't think women realize how nerve wracking going for a first kiss is. I mean I can be 99% sure she wants me to kiss her, but there is still that small two second window where I'm making myself completely vulnerable. Luckily I've only been cheeked twice in my life. However, getting rejected like that in such a vulnerable moment is so brutal. If I really enjoyed a woman's company on a first date and she beat me to the punch kissing me first, that's more than fine. The ONLY first kiss turn off I have is when a woman shoves her damn tongue down my throat. I love to make out as much as the next guy. But not on a first kiss. Soft, slow, romantic, and a hint of tongue if she initiates is perfect. I went out with one woman where the first date was good and she subtly says 'I had such a lovely time tonight". So I take this as a green light to kiss her. The second I do, her tongue is searching for my tonsils. Little did she know I had them out when I was 19. But since there is no non awkward of saying "you're a bad kisser" I sent her a text the next day and said that I'd decided to focus on another woman I'd been dating. There was no tongue involved. It was just a nice, soft, closed mouth kiss. As for him thanking me, I thought it was very sweet. I took it as him just wanting me to know that he enjoyed it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 As a man I would be happy with what you did. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 There was no tongue involved. It was just a nice, soft, closed mouth kiss. As for him thanking me, I thought it was very sweet. I took it as him just wanting me to know that he enjoyed it. He sounds nice 2 Link to post Share on other sites
fitnessfan365 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 There was no tongue involved. It was just a nice, soft, closed mouth kiss. As for him thanking me, I thought it was very sweet. I took it as him just wanting me to know that he enjoyed it. That's cool that it worked for you. Seems like a sweet connection. By the way, I'm in the south bay. Haven't seen many Bay Area folks on here. Did you meet the guy online? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author strawberryshortstack Posted April 22, 2015 Author Share Posted April 22, 2015 That's cool that it worked for you. Seems like a sweet connection. By the way, I'm in the south bay. Haven't seen many Bay Area folks on here. Did you meet the guy online? Yes, I met him on okcupid. Link to post Share on other sites
fitnessfan365 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 Yes, I met him on okcupid. Good stuff. It's cool that he matched up visually and personality wise to what you expected. With online, people can look vastly different than pics, or have a different personality in person. That's why I don't text with women online. I always do a phone call before hand. Voice is a better indicator of actual personality. Link to post Share on other sites
Jessie1231 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I definitely hope it's not a turn off. I'm all for kissing a guy on the first date if I like him. I feel that if you like someone, go for it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author strawberryshortstack Posted April 22, 2015 Author Share Posted April 22, 2015 Good stuff. It's cool that he matched up visually and personality wise to what you expected. With online, people can look vastly different than pics, or have a different personality in person. That's why I don't text with women online. I always do a phone call before hand. Voice is a better indicator of actual personality. I agree. We did text for a bit, but he also called me within 30 minutes of exchanging phone numbers with me. I'm a little shy, as my username indicates, but he made me feel very comfortable. I think the pre-date phone conversation helped with that though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author strawberryshortstack Posted April 22, 2015 Author Share Posted April 22, 2015 Thanks everyone for the responses. They've been very helpful. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
fitnessfan365 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I definitely hope it's not a turn off. I'm all for kissing a guy on the first date if I like him. I feel that if you like someone, go for it. I think it also depends on the type of woman that you date too. I'm used to dating women that are a bit more traditional, like an older fashioned gentleman that's a bit of an Alpha, etc.. So that's why I'm used to being the one that initiates. In a way, it's a turn on when a woman likes that dynamic. But with that said, if a woman who usually expects a guy to initiate is so attracted to me and just can't help herself, I'd be VERY flattered. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 My girlfriend told me on our first date: Shut up and kiss me. Doesn't get any more direct than that. She got rid of all of the anxiety that one feels when trying to go for it in on sentence. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy-Dayze Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I like a girl who takes the initiative just as long as it doesn't come off as her being "too interested". If she is fun, flirty and assertive then I love it but if it is a girl throwing herself at me on date 1 then it can be a big turn off. I think it is the same a guy making the first move - just have to do it the right way. It sounds like you did the former which is a good thing Link to post Share on other sites
joseb Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 My girlfriend told me on our first date: Shut up and kiss me. Doesn't get any more direct than that. She got rid of all of the anxiety that one feels when trying to go for it in on sentence. Sounds like a line from a movie! I like it. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I had a first date with a guy today, and we both enjoyed it. At the end, I hugged him, and gave him a quick goodbye kiss. I've never done that before, but since I'd had such a great time, and found him very attractive, it felt like the right thing to do. However, being the overthinker that I am, I'm now wondering if I should have done it. He texted me almost immediately to thank me for the kiss, so there's really no good reason for me to be doubting my choice, but I can't help myself. He thanked you What's to worry about? As long as you didn't throw him on the ground and french him, it's really just a polite gesture that indicates you liked him and had a good time. I bet you hug and give a little kiss when you see some of your friends and acquaintances too. Link to post Share on other sites
Gary S Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 (edited) He thanked you As long as you didn't throw him on the ground and french him, >> Ahhhh, a woman kissing the man first. It does not happen very often, but it's great when it does! This is my favorite thread of the week! Edited April 22, 2015 by Gary S 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 as a guy I find this a huge turn on Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts