sharp9 Posted April 20, 2015 Posted April 20, 2015 Went on a first date with this girl on Friday night and everything went well and set up a second date for Tuesday night. I texted her yesterday around 5 and didn't hear back from her until 8:30. She said she was busy and I didn't think anything of it. But I went to the OLD site we met on and she was on there around 7:15. So if she was busy (which is fine) then how does she have time to check the OLD site and not respond to my text. Should I take this as a sign she's not interested? I've also read sometimes girls purposely don't respond quickly to make it seem like they're not desperate. I'm somewhat recently out of a 13 year relationship. So while I have plenty of experience dating, this whole texting thing is new to me as far as dating goes.
Buddhist Posted April 20, 2015 Posted April 20, 2015 Don't text, it's a stupid way to communicate. She was busy, busy meeting someone else. Take from that you like. 1
fitnessfan365 Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 Dude this is a girl you had ONE DATE WITH. She has every right to still be going on the site and talking with guys. In the beginning until it gets more serous, just focus on the dates. Try not to get caught up in texting or thinking about her online activity. The truth is that the majority of guys online don't have a clue what they're doing, so they make me look good by comparison. That's why I could care less who she's talking to when she's not with me. Until we're exclusive, she can do what she wants. 5
Dork Vader Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 You're reading too far into this. Maybe she logged onto the site earlier in the day when she was NOT busy? Left the page open and then closed it around the time you saw? Any number of things could have been the reason. Either way you've only been on one date so why are you getting your panties in a wad because she is still using the site? It's not like you have any degree of exclusivity. You should be happy that she responded. Now get her another date have fun and be yourself. Let the ducks get in a row all on their own. If she runs off with another man who gives a crud? She's not the one for you plenty of other women out there. Your entire goal needs to be to have fun and enjoy things for what they are NOW. Who cares about anything else?
PumpkinLumpkin Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 The best advice for new daters: Zero expectations. Anything positive that happens, consider it a bonus. Example. You text her. Don't expect one back. If she responds, yay. Bonus. Who the F cares if she goes online? That has no bearing on your non-relationship at all. 2
Gary S Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 It's a little early to be worried about a profile... plus, how do you know she's not looking at your pic? Why are you worried and texting? - you have another date set, you are there, as far as you can go at this stage. 1
loveweary11 Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 The truth is that the majority of guys online don't have a clue what they're doing, so they make me look good by comparison. That's why I could care less who she's talking to when she's not with me. Until we're exclusive, she can do what she wants. Right? Any time a girl I approach online is hesitant, I encourage her to go talk to the other guys.. go out with them. Then they always come back in a few weeks.
Pinkdisney Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 I got out of a 13 yr marriage in 2011 so I feel your pain. The world of dating had changed a lot in those years. Try to have low to no expectations until you reach the 5th-6th date with someone. You had one (good) date, but don't be tracking her on-line status or you will literally drive yourself nuts. If you are exclusive and she is still doing OLD then i'd say you had something to worry about. 1
CarrieT Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 I texted her yesterday around 5 and didn't hear back from her until 8:30. She said she was busy and I didn't think anything of it. But I went to the OLD site we met on and she was on there around 7:15. Micro-managing much!?!?! Seriously, dude, you are WAY too invested in someone you had *one* date with. Her time is her own until you two are in a committed relationship and second-guessing her actions minute-by-minute is just plane nutsy-koo-koo. 2
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 OP you're being needy. I suggest you stop looking at her profile unless you have dire need (checking an interest or something) Also don't expect her to NOT be on dating site until she asks you to be exclusive ... You're a ways off. She waited 3 hours to text you, who cares?!? I've waited over half a day for a response sometimes. I won't always text back right away either, I think of something worth saying first and make it good. Text is for flirting and confirming dates. Not chitchat.
katiegrl Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 Dude this is a girl you had ONE DATE WITH. She has every right to still be going on the site and talking with guys. In the beginning until it gets more serous, just focus on the dates. Try not to get caught up in texting or thinking about her online activity. The truth is that the majority of guys online don't have a clue what they're doing, so they make me look good by comparison. That's why I could care less who she's talking to when she's not with me. Until we're exclusive, she can do what she wants. Agree with fitnessfan. Stop acting like a "girl," man. Come on now....... 1
joseb Posted April 21, 2015 Posted April 21, 2015 OP, I can relate - a few years ago, I came out of a 13 year relationship (seems to be a lucky number?!) and I was pretty clueless. I'm sure I came across as needy. Like others have said, it's just a date. She isn't your girlfriend. You are free too to look at other options, so do that. And I for one try to avoid texting as much as possible - it's a crappy communication medium which leads to many misunderstandings.
Recommended Posts