smackie9 Posted April 22, 2015 Posted April 22, 2015 Tip: Never say “it’s fine if you're not interested. I totally understand." no girl likes negative messages that screams "I have no confidence in myself". This is a turn off. 1
Redhead14 Posted April 22, 2015 Posted April 22, 2015 UPDATE: I took your advice and asked her when she's free this weekend. Even though this is usually discouraged, I also tell her “it’s fine if you're not interested. I totally understand." At this point, I'm just basically fishing for the rejection message. She responds back in twenty minutes with she’s “kinda busy this weekend, but maybe afterwards when we are both free.” I lay it out nicely for her to just ignore me or say “Sorry, I’m not interested”. I get the hint from the “busy” line. BUT why does she add in “maybe afterwards when we are both free”?! I understand that this does not mean she is suggesting concrete alternative plans. But why even bring it up? A simple “Hey, sorry I’m busy this weekend” would suffice. She just sucks at rejecting people. Jesus. Moving on... Much thanks guys! Especially fitnessfan, TheFinalWord, Redhead, and Gary S. Yes, but now you kinda know a little bit more about her and you have resolved the entire question and can move on. If you didn't do this, you'd be wondering for a while longer and kinda stretching it out when you didn't have to. I'd just respond to her "when we are both free" text because she did phrase it as a question and that leaves the ball in your court. You could say "thank you anyway. I've got a lot going on myself next week." and don't respond to anymore communication from her if she does contact you. She's being wishy-washy and maybe trying to leave the door open for herself to "come around", kinda like bread crumbs in case her other options don't come through. Who really knows but you've put enough effort into it.
fitnessfan365 Posted April 22, 2015 Posted April 22, 2015 Well at least not you can learn to focus on a woman's actions. But it's always better to act confident and completely indifferent. If a woman says "maybe" always withdraw the offer. Say "If you're not sure of your schedule, we can do it some other time." Then see how she responds. If she stresses she wants to see you, and tries to come up with a day, then you know she's being sincere. If she simply responds with "OK", that's when you tell her "No worries. When your schedule is more definite get back to me and we'll plan something then." Then you don't contact her again.
katiegrl Posted April 22, 2015 Posted April 22, 2015 Tip: Never say “it’s fine if you're not interested. I totally understand." no girl likes negative messages that screams "I have no confidence in myself". This is a turn off. ^^ Beat me to it! Except I will add a word "Never "EVER" say...." Ugh. OP, if you learn anything from this forum, it's THAT! 1
MoreThanThat Posted April 23, 2015 Posted April 23, 2015 FB Messenger over phone # is not a big thing to me unless you've gone on a few dates. Most men I've dated recently prefer to text it seems vs talk voice and for me, FB messenger is easier than text. I have multiple phone #'s since I'm split between 2 countries and my business is Internet-based. So FB means a faster response with me than a text usually.
Vercetti Posted April 23, 2015 Posted April 23, 2015 Sorry, can't do lunch and don't have a Facebook...usually up late, coffee?
Author DarkNoel Posted April 23, 2015 Author Posted April 23, 2015 Yes, but now you kinda know a little bit more about her and you have resolved the entire question and can move on. If you didn't do this, you'd be wondering for a while longer and kinda stretching it out when you didn't have to. I'd just respond to her "when we are both free" text because she did phrase it as a question and that leaves the ball in your court. You could say "thank you anyway. I've got a lot going on myself next week." and don't respond to anymore communication from her if she does contact you. She's being wishy-washy and maybe trying to leave the door open for herself to "come around", kinda like bread crumbs in case her other options don't come through. Who really knows but you've put enough effort into it. Thanks, Redhead. But I'm so done with her. I'm not even going to respond. What's the point? Why waste the effort and energy and devote more attention to her? If she's truly interested, she will reach out to me, like fitnessfan said. I'm not contacting her anymore. Honestly, I think she's just playing the field and keeping me around because I'm a useful connection. She just moved to the city and wants to meet new people, so she probably doesn't want to limit herself. You're right though, I'm probably just plan B in case other options don't come through.
smg15 Posted April 23, 2015 Posted April 23, 2015 Sounds like she is on medication since she would allow you to see her real name and friends but nor give you her number. Stay away from this wackball. Lol
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