Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Is there a right or wrong way to do this? One of my friends (I'm friend-zoned from way back when I was horrible with women) posted some pictures of her birthday party the other night. I looked at the girls tagged and three of them were pretty, one is in a relationship, the other one is cute but not totally my type, but the other one is my type and has some references to things on her facebook to common interests of mine. Now, on facebook, a lot of her things are 'private' so I don't know if she's in a relationship but all her visible profile pictures are selfies, there's no guys commenting on them, and there's none with a guy, so I'm assuming she -may- be single or not in a long term relationship. So, is it cool if I ask my friend about the availability of her friend and is there a right or wrong way to do it?
EgoJoe Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Don't do it. Meet Women on your own. It won't go smoothly.
Author Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Don't do it. Meet Women on your own. It won't go smoothly. Why do you say this? Is it really that horrendous to say, "I think so & so is cute and if she's single, can you try to include me the next time she's at a party etc."? 1
Revan32 Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Why do you say this? Is it really that horrendous to say, "I think so & so is cute and if she's single, can you try to include me the next time she's at a party etc."? Yeah I'm pretty sure a lot more couples have met from mutual friends than randomly approaching girls in bars or whatever. Don't listen to the other guy. 1
Author Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Yeah I'm pretty sure a lot more couples have met from mutual friends than randomly approaching girls in bars or whatever. Don't listen to the other guy. So how do you think I should approach it? Should I just be straight with the friend.. like, hey, saw pictures of your birthday party.. X girl looks cute, is she single?
Revan32 Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 So how do you think I should approach it? Should I just be straight with the friend.. like, hey, saw pictures of your birthday party.. X girl looks cute, is she single? Yep, i've asked girls about there friends before. You can either ask about her specifically, or just ask if she has any cute single friends that might want a free lunch, and just see if she brings her up. Some girls get into it, and actually start going through their facebook with you looking for any single girls they know.
Author Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Yep, i've asked girls about there friends before. You can either ask about her specifically, or just ask if she has any cute single friends that might want a free lunch, and just see if she brings her up. Some girls get into it, and actually start going through their facebook with you looking for any single girls they know. Cool, I just didn't know if it was better to just be like straight forward with it or to just kind of start a conversation and then bring it up.. Although, I should ask her to chill, she's been through a lot too and I can bring it up organically through conversation.
Ninjainpajamas Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Depends on the "value" that she deems you as date-able and how interested her friend would be in you. If she likes you herself and thinks you are a good guy/catch, then she'd likely have no problem hooking you up...but on the other hand if you're kind of whatever, just a random guy friend and don't really have a good friendship with her anyway and not a particularly handsome guy, you're likely to get shot down. I'd say just try it and learn...I'm not going to specifically tell you what to do, I think this should be something you tackle on your own. Definitely make a move, but how you go about it is your choice...you got to feel out situations for yourself like this and trust your instincts or develop the experience. 1
Vintage79 Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Just ask them about the person - don't over complicate it. You're asking your friend about one of their friends - if they're scared to answer those types of questions, they're really not your friend. Note, though, that they may not try to get you two together, but they'll probably be fine trying to make sure that you're both invited to the same parties/get togethers. Just tread carefully if you go out with the person so you don't burn a friendship. I don't see any issues - besides, if you're friend isn't comfortable with the question(s), they likely just won't answer, or they'll tell you they're not comfy doing so - just don't push them past their comfortzone. 1
Gary S Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Blind dates set up by friends and family is one of the top ways people meet... I think it's tied with OLD. 1
Author Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Depends on the "value" that she deems you as date-able and how interested her friend would be in you. If she likes you herself and thinks you are a good guy/catch, then she'd likely have no problem hooking you up...but on the other hand if you're kind of whatever, just a random guy friend and don't really have a good friendship with her anyway and not a particularly handsome guy, you're likely to get shot down. I'd say just try it and learn...I'm not going to specifically tell you what to do, I think this should be something you tackle on your own. Definitely make a move, but how you go about it is your choice...you got to feel out situations for yourself like this and trust your instincts or develop the experience. Well, she definitely likes me.. I mean, I'm the go-to guy for her when she's asking about her boyfriends or guys she likes (is this guy legit or not?). She also comes to me for advice when her relationships has ended. So she clearly thinks highly of my opinion. I'm not a particularly handsome guy, but, the girl that I'm looking at isn't a total 10 either.. she's probably in my range, just whether or not she has a boyfriend is the question.. I don't think so since I think most girls like that would have one or two profile pictures of them with their man.. if she's taken, she's taken, no harm, I suppose.
preraph Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 One question: If she's your friend, why weren't you invited to that birthday party? If you had been, you could have met that woman.
Author Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Just ask them about the person - don't over complicate it. You're asking your friend about one of their friends - if they're scared to answer those types of questions, they're really not your friend. Note, though, that they may not try to get you two together, but they'll probably be fine trying to make sure that you're both invited to the same parties/get togethers. Just tread carefully if you go out with the person so you don't burn a friendship. I don't see any issues - besides, if you're friend isn't comfortable with the question(s), they likely just won't answer, or they'll tell you they're not comfy doing so - just don't push them past their comfortzone. Gotcha and yeah, I would expect her to not set us up on a date but maybe invite me to a get together with said person, then maybe put in a good word for me prior to. At least gauge the interest.
Author Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 One question: If she's your friend, why weren't you invited to that birthday party? If you had been, you could have met that woman. It was a "girls night" birthday party. There were no dudes to be found. The good news is, with the cast of characters in the photo, it means she's a close enough friend, so it wouldn't be farfetched that she would be invited to something else in the near future.
rester Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 So how do you think I should approach it? Should I just be straight with the friend.. like, hey, saw pictures of your birthday party.. X girl looks cute, is she single? This is the route I would take. You don't have anything to lose unless you get a reputation for asking about a lot of different women, but if it's only once in awhile and you don't make a habit out of it, I think the above would be a good way to approach it. 2
Author Throldur Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 This is the route I would take. You don't have anything to lose unless you get a reputation for asking about a lot of different women, but if it's only once in awhile and you don't make a habit out of it, I think the above would be a good way to approach it. Sweet, that's probably what I will do then. I'll welcome any more opinions. I'll probably approach this on Monday. I have the deciding game of my hockey finals on Sunday to worry about before any girls.
kendahke Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 So how do you think I should approach it? Should I just be straight with the friend.. like, hey, saw pictures of your birthday party.. X girl looks cute, is she single? that's exactly how you should ask.
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