cottom Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 We started chatting on Tinder around a month ago, we texted and facebooked each other a lot, I tried to arrange to meet but she was always busy. I went on holiday, came back we were still chatting a lot but she was avoiding meeting. In the end I asked her why she was so reluctant to meet up and she said that it was cause she has anxiety. She put off meeting still for another week and then finally we arranged to meet that night. We met and just chilled round my flat for a few hours, we had a laugh, hugged etc nothing more, we ended up hanging out for about 4 hours, 2 hours longer than we had planned for, just chatting. We have been texting each other since, i tried to arrange to meet again but shes been avoiding it like she did before we met. She told me shes to nervous. Texting today though has really confused me on how we stand: Me: Tomorrow are you working at all? If its sunny lets go Stratford and chill, have a good day? Her: I work 9-2 but like i dunno i just dont think i can be in a relationship Me: Who said relationships?? friendzoning me hahaha Her: Im not friend zoning at all, i just get scared about it Me: Ah i get you after your last relationship but take life as it comes! you need to grab your prince, or am i a little to street to be a prince though Her: Aha i can teach you how to be royalty Me: Pretty woman with roles reversed? Her: Ahah exactly, ive always wanted to be Richard Gere Me: And ive always wanted to be julia roberts, toe dr said i need to take time to think about a sex change though :/ Her: Have you ever watched it though? legit my fave film Me: On a serious level though, yeah i like you, im interested in you, i had a real nice night monday Her: erm i had a real nice night too it was really chilled and i enjoyed myself!!! Me: haha lies Her: Ahaha if you believe so Me: well, erm is the key word for im thinking of a lie right now Her: I just literally cant be with someone right now, its just not the right time Me: yeah same, my works all over the place, i dont know where ill be in 6 months. I just want to meet someone to chill and have a laugh with, no relationship drama Her: Yeah exactly thats happened to me before, id prefer to be chill and just enjoy it so maybe we can be chill aha Me: wow, your chill word has a million uses...just chill and we can chill and chill how chill chill (just save it and we can chill and see how it goes) Her: So we can chill cause thatll be chill and now youll be saying chill all the time so chill ...... the convo goes on like that, back and forth flirting all day. I put a status on facebook "90% of a relationship is deciding where to eat, what takeaway to have and what films to watch" she text me "whose this about ;)", i said how its after my mate mentioned it last night i thought id make a status she says "oh ahaha i thought i had competition" "you do and your way behind the rest" "i guess ill have to try harder then". She is sending these mixed signals out, i have no idea what to think?! Help???
PegNosePete Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 She is not sending mixed signals at all. The signals she is sending are loud and clear. She is not interested in meeting, otherwise she would have met you by now. She is a time vampire. Next!
Gary S Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Actually from the texts it sounds like she's on the rebound.
Author cottom Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 They seem pretty mixed to me, she texts first, then says she doesnt want a relationship because shes scared, then she says she will look after me like pretty woman, then she says that she cant handle a relationship right now, then she says she has competition for me and needs to try harder to get me I dont get what she wants
Toodaloo Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Her: I just literally cant be with someone right now, its just not the right time How is that confusing? You need to leave this one alone before she wastes more of your time and move on.
Toodaloo Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I dont get what she wants Attention... Move on and waste your on someone who wants to be with you rather than just get an ego boost out of you.
PegNosePete Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I dont get what she wants So ask her out again. If she says yes, all good. If she doesn't then move on.
Wisecrack Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 TLDR: Something I'm starting to really listen to these days is my 6th sense. If you've got to go to so much trouble to post about a girl in the early stages of dating/ relationship; then she's just not that into you buddy. Don't worry, I've done it that so many times it's become automatic. I'm starting to follow the old adage in that a girl who is interested will not find ways to fool you. You WILL know and she WILL make it clear.
Bohonia Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Texting and calls should be used to set up dates, if she knows everything about you the attraction will fade. Give her space and let her come to you. Ask her if she is available to go out for drinks Friday night and if she's busy let her know to call you when she can meet up. Part of dating is attraction if you give to much to soon the mystery will dissipate. If she shows her interest keep things going, but let her chase you DO NOT chase women. Let her call and chase you if she doesn't she was't interested in more anyway.
Author cottom Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 My main problem, i dont have any friends where i live, it is just me in a flat on my own. I work where everyone has their own cliques so i sit on my own at work 24/7. Growing up i have girls throwing themselves at me left right and center. Getting girlfriends was easy, from the age of 16 i spent 5 months total single across 7 years. Im 22 now and work and go to the gym and then go back to my flat on my own. Ive been single almost a year now with no girls on the scene after finding out my ex was cheating for 2 months everytime i left the house at 6am she would go with another guy until 7pm when i returned. I worked 100 miles away at the time. I seem to have forgotten how to speak to girls and when one comes across me i kind of grab hold and scare them off, i pay them to much attention etc and i just cant cure it by myself. All i think is that maybe one day a girl will come across me and be perfect and will like me clinigng to them but its obvious they wont and i cant stop it :/
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