j_mysterio Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Last night I ran into my exs best friend and her boyfriend at a restaurant/bar. I didn't want to totally avoid them so I made my way over eventually to where they were sitting at the bar... Said hi, how ya doing, hows your new job, talker about soccer for a second then went on my way. My exs best friend asked me how I was doing like 4 times, idk if its cause she felt awkward or was trying to get something out of me.. I said good/great every time and didn't mention my ex once. This was the right move, right? I feel id feel pathetic if I mentioned the ex. I think pretty much anything I said would've been and has been passed onto my ex. Tell me I did good. Lol 2
Toodaloo Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Bravo! Well Done! Perfect! Please tell me they saw you having a great time, laughing, smiling etc Life does go on! 1
PegNosePete Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Personally I would not have talked to an ex's best friend. They are not your friends so what do you hope to accomplish by this conversation? It seems to me that you're secretly hoping they'll tell your ex about the conversation. 1
Author j_mysterio Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Lolol actually yeah.. I was out with 3 of my friends and we couldn't stop laughing at dumb things we were saying. It was a good night.
Author j_mysterio Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 I always liked her friend... She was really nice and open minded.. And clearly saw me sitting across the bar. Youre right, I could've pretended I didn't see her.
Toodaloo Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I always liked her friend... She was really nice and open minded.. And clearly saw me sitting across the bar. Youre right, I could've pretended I didn't see her. No that would have been childish. You said hello and were polite then went back to your evening. Hold your head up and know its ok. 2
organizedchaos Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Last night I ran into my exs best friend and her boyfriend at a restaurant/bar. I didn't want to totally avoid them so I made my way over eventually to where they were sitting at the bar... Said hi, how ya doing, hows your new job, talker about soccer for a second then went on my way. My exs best friend asked me how I was doing like 4 times, idk if its cause she felt awkward or was trying to get something out of me.. I said good/great every time and didn't mention my ex once. This was the right move, right? I feel id feel pathetic if I mentioned the ex. I think pretty much anything I said would've been and has been passed onto my ex. Tell me I did good. Lol Smart move. No need to ignore. Shows you've moved on and can be friendly. No harm in that. Her asking you how you are 4 times was probably just nerves. I've run in to two of my exs closest friends, couldn't avoid them. They were always cool to me so we just chatted briefly, no mention of the ex, and went our way. Same thing I'd have done running in to any old acquaintance I hadn't seen in awhile. 2
Author j_mysterio Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Yeah it was awkward on both parts I believe. I said **** it and threw myself into a convo with them and try as be as normal as possible with being a douche ex avoiding them... There's no point in ignoring and no point in talking.. I believe I just went the civil route considering I always liked her friend. 2
Chi townD Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 You did fine. And you came across as a guy that has no hard feelings. Also, good that you didn't ask about your Ex and count your blessings that she didn't volunteer any information about your Ex. You're right, she probably asked "How are you doing?" 3-4 times out of nervousness. Like, she didn't know how to speak to you as an individual because she only spoken to you when you were part of a couple. You did fine. Now, back to NC and I have a feeling that you might be obsessing over the fact that she might say something to your Ex. Stop it and don't worry about it. Chances are she's not going to say anything because you two really didn't talk about anything important and no juicy gossip material. She's probably just write it off as a chances run in with you and won't think much more on it. 1
Author j_mysterio Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 I see where youre coming from but it finally reached a breaking point where I was relieved the ex put the last nail in the coffin. Do I still think about her? Yeah. Do I still love her? Yeah. Do I think she's an idiot?. Yeah. Would I take her back if the chance arose? Idk. That's just where I am now. 1
Author j_mysterio Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 I'm just here for the outside perspective and to write to get things off my mind.
ZiggyZoo Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I think you did the right thing for sure, and handled it well. Think about it, if your ex's friend saw you and KNEW that you saw her, it would've gotten right back to your ex. She then would have gotten a sense of satisfaction that you're still so broken up over her that you can't even talk to her friends. Or at least that you were suck a jerk, you deliberately ignored her. This way, what is there to report? That you were polite, said hi, and that you're doing well. This is the opposite of interesting to any ex. NOT that I'm about playing games or anything, but being polite is the best on so many levels. 2
Riptide91 Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I see where youre coming from but it finally reached a breaking point where I was relieved the ex put the last nail in the coffin. Do I still think about her? Yeah. Do I still love her? Yeah. Do I think she's an idiot?. Yeah. Would I take her back if the chance arose? Idk. That's just where I am now. Same here. Damn good place to be.
Author j_mysterio Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Its getting easier for sure... Just gotta get used to being single now... I'm slowly getting it ha
Recommended Posts