zachsack Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 This girl I met a few weeks ago really seemed to enjoy my company. We flirt. One day, I called her "fam" and she didn't seem to happy. She replied with the same word, but a bit vigorously. The next day, she didn't have a problem with it and started calling me it too. I think I may showed her that my feelings for her is nothing more than a friend, which is not the case. I want to tell her that thats not the case. Would that be a good idea? I don't want her to give up on me. Should I ask her if she liked it when I call her fam?
Penguin_hugs Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 I'm not quite sure what you meant by "fam"? As in an abbreviation for family? If so it's probably because she saw it as friend zoning her as you referred to her like your sister. I'd apologize and try and move on from it
Treasa Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 I'm too old for this (I literally had to Urban Dictionary that to see what it meant), but yeah, tell her how you feel about her. See what happens after that. 2
DrReplyInRhymes Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 She may have taken it wrong, or obviously inferred what was implied, Telling a girl she's like "fam" definitely, in my book, sends the wrong vibe, I'd clarify the situation and tell her that she isn't like a sister to you, That you find her amazing and attractive, and you're very interested too.
Author zachsack Posted April 16, 2015 Author Posted April 16, 2015 I'm too old for this (I literally had to Urban Dictionary that to see what it meant), but yeah, tell her how you feel about her. See what happens after that. She may have taken it wrong, or obviously inferred what was implied, Telling a girl she's like "fam" definitely, in my book, sends the wrong vibe, I'd clarify the situation and tell her that she isn't like a sister to you, That you find her amazing and attractive, and you're very interested too. So your saying to just straight up tell her in person, my feelings? Its only been 3 weeks since I started talking to her. Will this come off as needy and desperate?
DrReplyInRhymes Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 (edited) So your saying to just straight up tell her in person, my feelings? Its only been 3 weeks since I started talking to her. Will this come off as needy and desperate? You're not asking her for a relationship or commitment, true? You're letting her know that you don't see her as "fam" to you, Telling a girl she's amazing and you're interested in her? I don't see that as needy, personally, but some may not concur. EDIT: That doesn't mean you should go off and start to spout, From a mountaintop claiming you love her with a scream a shout. Just clarify the meaning of fam and how you didn't mean that, Who knows, maybe she didn't take it wrong and your attractions intact! Edited April 17, 2015 by DrReplyInRhymes
Author zachsack Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 You're not asking her for a relationship or commitment, true? You're letting her know that you don't see her as "fam" to you, Telling a girl she's amazing and you're interested in her? I don't see that as needy, personally, but some may not concur. It rhymed. I do plan to go father than "just friends" with her. But 3 weeks seems a short time period for that matter.
Author zachsack Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 You're not asking her for a relationship or commitment, true? You're letting her know that you don't see her as "fam" to you, Telling a girl she's amazing and you're interested in her? I don't see that as needy, personally, but some may not concur. EDIT: That doesn't mean you should go off and start to spout, From a mountaintop claiming you love her with a scream a shout. Just clarify the meaning of fam and how you didn't mean that, Who knows, maybe she didn't take it wrong and your attractions intact! So that means: -Don't go straightforward and tell her my feelings. -Instead, just clear the fog on my mistake on calling her fam. And what I meant. 1
DrReplyInRhymes Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 So that means: -Don't go straightforward and tell her my feelings. -Instead, just clear the fog on my mistake on calling her fam. And what I meant. You'll know when to take the next step if she's into you, It won't feel like work, or a game, and there's no strategy to view, It is what it is, keep her smiling and laughing with the time you share, But don't be too afraid to make a move for the pain of regret is more to bear.
Author zachsack Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 You'll know when to take the next step if she's into you, It won't feel like work, or a game, and there's no strategy to view, It is what it is, keep her smiling and laughing with the time you share, But don't be too afraid to make a move for the pain of regret is more to bear. Thank you.
ExpatInItaly Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I'm too old for this (I literally had to Urban Dictionary that to see what it meant), but yeah, tell her how you feel about her. See what happens after that. Same, apparently. I have no idea what this means.
badpenny Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I thought it was like FWB... "F**K A Mate...." Oops.... 1
veggirl Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 you don't need to bring it up again, just stop doing it. it makes her sound like she's part of your group of friends, not someone who you are interested in. I'd be like wtf if I was her too. 1
road Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 To assume the word FAM to be understood is wrong. Then why call a girl you are dating FAM makes no sense for it is not a compliment.
Author zachsack Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 To assume the word FAM to be understood is wrong. Then why call a girl you are dating FAM makes no sense for it is not a compliment. Well, we were getting close and it kind of slipped from my mouth, as fam is what you call someone you trust and love. But I had a deeper feeling for her than that.
ExpatInItaly Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Well, we were getting close and it kind of slipped from my mouth, as fam is what you call someone you trust and love. But I had a deeper feeling for her than that. Apparently it's not as common as you think, at least in this context. If I were dating a man and he referred to me that way, I would assume he's not interested romantically. But then again, I have a feeling I'm quite a bit older than you. Maybe the younger set uses this word. How old are you both, OP?
walkitout Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 This girl I met a few weeks ago really seemed to enjoy my company. We flirt. One day, I called her "fam" and she didn't seem to happy. She replied with the same word, but a bit vigorously. The next day, she didn't have a problem with it and started calling me it too. I think I may showed her that my feelings for her is nothing more than a friend, which is not the case. I want to tell her that thats not the case. Would that be a good idea? I don't want her to give up on me. Should I ask her if she liked it when I call her fam? Because it makes her think you're a player and you're not interested in her in a serious way.She wants a relationship not friends with benefits.You're just like the guy i'm dating.He calls me dude and man and that really irritates me and upsets me.
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