towch Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 I will try to be as constructive as i can. I also intend to tell truth as i know. I only ask for you insight, support and advice. So i broke up with my now ex of 2 weeks and i am still struggling to move. There has been closure no explanation but i get to this further down. My Ex and I had a 3 year relationship most of the time we were both students and i barely had enough money for gas to get to school plus i lived with my aunt who was a terrible and controlling person. Had to be home at certain times, i spent most of my weekend doing things for my aunt when i was suppose to be relaxing after a week of school. This is important because it played a roll in our relationship. I graduated May 2014 and started working in july of 2014. Moved out this march. The Seed of Distrust: We started going out and we were into each other. from the get go she has always been insecure and paranoid. first week of us dating she was already checking my phone, texts, call logs, contacts. I was cool with it, i told myself that she would find nothing and maybe that would calm her down and make her get over her insecurities. Lets just say it did not work. I was in love and so was she. she partied, had fun with her friends and i had no problem with it. One day she called me crying, she was at a party and was drunk and a guy (the host) took her to the room and change her shirt because hers was wet. I know there was more to that but i told her not to let it happen again and that was that. I never mentioned it again. I never bring up things in the past NEVER. The Insecurity & jealously: Things were good between, we had the usual petty fights. Then we had a big fight. we had been together for awhile now but she was still checking my stuff, my phone. So i finally told her that she really needed to stop checking my stuff that i didn't check hers plus i had given her no reason to be doing that. I told her that if she checked it again i will password protect my phone from that point on. She disregarded my comments and checked again. I most point out that all along her phone had been password protect. So i lock my phone and she say that if i didn't unlock it we were done, i refused she kicked me out. she later calls me and we make up. I unlock my phone (She still never stops). Fast forward she start telling me how her best friend had date nights every week, how her boyfriend buys her gifts alot. I kept reminding her that i was an international student at the time, i couldn't work outside of school and finding work in school was hard in its self. The Other Man #1: Yes, you guys know this one. That new guy friend. Yes he arrived and she told me all about him and how they met and they were just friend. But before i get into that, i didn't mention her Ex. She was in contact with him. The thing is that she always told me about it, she i taught to myself if something is happening why would she be telling me (in truth nothing was happening) but it got a a point where he was no asking her to go out with him again that was where i drew the line. i told her to stop talking to him. She asked me to handle it and i told her "It is not my problem, i do not know the guy. You handle your issue". It was handled, she stopped talking to him. Now the new guy. She had been telling him how our relationship was going nicely (materialistically). Emotions wise i was there for her, when she was in problem, in need i was there. When it came to money i had a hard time, i didn't have it like that. If her confidant he started to work his way in telling her how he would be a better person to her than i was. She told me all this things (i know there is more but i can't remember the details, you see when i forgive, i forget.). she confused that she was having feeling for him this was when she came to visit on day. she had been acting funny with her phone always hold it and taking it with her wherever she went. So one time she left her phone and went to use the bathroom, i know i did not access it because she had it locked (she told me the passcode once but i chose to forget it. I don't like having peoples private info) so what i did was move the phone. She came in and looked at her phone and all of a sudden her body language changed she was acting all weird. I kept my cool and said nothing. She later left and called me asking if i accessed her phone, i followed up by asking her if she had something to tell me. she started crying and told me she had been talking to the new guy...you guys know the rest. I know we broke up because of him and got back together. she insisted on keeping him as a friend but i wouldn't allow it. So she ended it. My Descent in Darkness: Before i begin, i take full responsibility for my actions and there is no excuse for it. At this point i had had enough, my Ex of checking my stuff like i had done something even when she was the one the doing messed up things. So i created a dating site account and started messaging other girls. Needless to say i rarely go a response. i did the whole craigslist thing but i never met up with anyone. or had sex with anyone. I sometimes ask myself why i did that and the only answer i can come up with is that i was looking for validation, looking for confirmation that i could be wanted that i was hot stuff. I always felt guilty afterward. Sometimes i out off with friends with the mindset to get girls, i get there and i couldn't even look them in the eyes without feeling like i cheated. My friends girl friend onced complimented me on how my Ex must be lucky to have a guy that doesn't even look at other girls (In my head i said you have no idea). So my snooping ex while i was away checked my emails and saw the emails i had sent on craigslist. It didn't go well she expressed her disappointment and i apologised. I told her that if she wanted to leave me because of this i understood. She choose to look past it BUT NEVER FORGOT. Everytime she was upset with me she brought it up. every single time. I never once brought up what she did as a counter. The Lies My Friend and The Evil Best Friend: So thing settle down for all intensive purposes, we are in good standing. I am in school working on my class project. The Ex asks if she can come hangout, i tell her i was working on a project and she wouldn't have my full attention. She insists, i cave and invite her. She arrives and sits on a table beside us. I introduce her. I have this female friend in my group ( i have known her way before i met my Ex. She is one of those friend you have in school that you take 90% of your classes with because you have same major). She is very playful and was messing with everyone i must also add that her boyfriend now husband was there too. Nothing, totally nothing happened. My Ex insisted after that that i stop being friend with her. First she said that something was going on between us then it changed to i we were looking at each other with lust then it changed to that just her was looking at looking me the wrong way. I tried to convince her that this was false but she wouldn't have. I told her that my communication with this friend only happened in school environment and she could check my call logs (she did), she found nothing. But she kept insisting. I got so back that i had to talk to my friend and her boyfriend to message my Ex telling her what the situation was. they did, my Ex followed up saying they were rude. they weren't rude. I explained to her that she just accused her of messing around that no one would smile about it. She said she was going to let it go. We promised to be truthful and open to each other about what was happening in our lives. I hadn't had a class with my friend for 2 semester. The third semester I had two classes back to back with my friend. In the spirit of openness i tell my Ex that i had classes with my friend, she didn't take it well she insisted i dropped my classes or switch needless to say i didn't do any of the option, i couldnt. I needed to graduate and other classes were full.Later we had a fight about something then she immediately goes and asks her best friend who is in my school if she see me with some other girl and her friends tells her that she see my every day with my friend (lies we only had classes once a week together). My Ex gives me an ultimatum at this point i had had it and i breakup with her. The longest Break: My memory is murky here but there are the details. She starts begging to get back together and i refuse (I really never get angry, but i was raging). There is one thing i hate the most and that is being accused of doing something i never did. I kept telling her i was not ready for a relationship, we were friends, she insisted. She began telling me about guys she was talking to and how this guy didn't call her and that guy wasn't ****. I listened and gave whatever advice i could. I told her if she felt that she wanted to tell me about her escapades i would listen but i would never tell her about my relations with the opposite sex. I was fully engage into school and wasn't actively looking for anyone. 2 months into the break i meet someone, the Ex finds out and she it all over it she begins asking we to go back out with her. The truth is at this point i wanted to but i already was talking to someone i had to end things with the new girl. I took me awhile but i did, i told the new girl that i couldn't commit because of how i felt about my Ex. She understood because we weren't even close to being serious. I gave it a few week and told my Ex i was ready if she would still have me. So we started going out again. Things were good, as a matter fact i fell more in love with her. More than i ever was or ever imagined i could. It all happened one day when i looked into her eyes and then i told her i loved her. I don't think she could comprehend what i was feeling. The downfall: While my Ex had been begging for me to take her back she was also seeing someone. When we got back together, she was still seeing him. months past and things were going great (at least i believed that). I even loved her more than i ever had. come 2015 i stated sensing some changing. She stopped seeing me, calling, texting. Took her almost a day to return my calls or text. I haven't really picked up on it because i just had a job out of college and was busy plus i lived in a very strict house that restricted movement at certain hours. We were both looking forward to my moving out and stated that we would be inseparable then. Come March 2015, i moved out. She was on where to be found. she suddenly became too busy to see me, to call me, to text me. That was a massive change, this was someone that couldn't stay away from me. This was someone i used to beg to keep her appointment with friends because she kept canceling just to be with me. I confronted her about it and she continued saying that she is just busy and that during the break she got soo used to being alone (See she is trying to blame me for it). I told her that we need to work on our relationship she got upset and said we should downgrade our relationship to just “talking/going-out”. I had no choice but urged her to try harder and i will. Needless to say there was no change on her end. I confronted her again a couple of weeks later, i told her that we practically are just simple friends. She suggested we be friends with benefits (I was crushed). She said she wanted to be single for a while to find her self. again i had no choice in the matter. This was March and i had only seen her twice. The day i moved in “3rd” and my birthday “24th”. I just let her be and on the 31th (our anniversary) she texted me “Happy Anniversary”, i was happy and taught this was a change. we talked a little through the day. April 1st: She calls me in the morning crying (in my head i was like oh no please God don’t let it be what i think it is). It was and worst. I though maybe she hook up with a guy last night only to find our that she was seeing someone all the while we were together (8-9 months). I wanted to die, i wished for death. She said she had strong feeling for him, he was the one getting all the sex. I was mad. She really wouldn't take about it. Days later i told her i forgive her and nobody is perfect that i too had done wrong. She said “no as bad as me”. I said “bad is bad”. I asked her to come see me on august 2nd so we can talk and squash it, she agreed. She never show, didn't answer calls. She called me the next day apologize saying that she couldn't face me she then asked me to come to Delaware for Easter and we could talk then. we talked through the weekend and we professed our love for each other and how we were going to talk to a priest and afterwards ask him to renew how commitment vows. Easter come along and yet another disappointment. she kept avoiding the talk. I finally told her straight up that we need to talk. I had written a bunch of question i wanted to ask which lead on to her asking me whatever she wanted and so on. She read it and said she felt uncomfortable answering the questions. I hit me if she can't answer those question then she is not sure what she wants or who she wants. She told me that the other guys was not a factor but i knew better. She always was ready to say whatever just to get her way. I accepted that she wanted to be alone/single or better yet be done with me. I asked her what she wanted from me and she said she would prefer if i was still in her life and called and texted her like normal. I told that is not doable seeing as she found it hard to respond to me even when we were going out. I made my peace and we sat and watched TV for a few. Fast forward we left Delaware back to Maryland. When we arrived i gave her a hug and thanked her for everything and all the memories. She said i was acting weird. I proceeded to tell her that this was probably the last time we would see each other again. She chuckled and said “I really doubt that”. She started walking to her apartment and i proceeded towards my car and left. No Contact Phase: I tried no contact and failed twice. I had gone no contact for 2 days monday and tuesday. She never even tried to contact. On wednesday i tried reaching about my phone bill she works at t-mobile and usually applies a discount. My bill was due(in reality what i really wanted was to contact her). for some reason i could i think her phone was off (i taught i was block but i tried other phones). I sent her friend an instagram message asking about my Ex and told her to keep it between us. An hour or two my Ex contacts me: Ex: Hey Me: Hi Ex: how are you Me: I am good, u? Ex: I am okay.... Ex: i haven't forgotten about your T-mobile Me: ok Thanks (This is where i **** up) Me: I miss you Ex: I miss ya too Me: Can we hangout something Ex: ummm as friends though?? Me: Yeah friends (I am upset) Ex: That sounds fun Me: Ok let me know when works for you (i am pathetic) *That was our last conversation* She never contact me again nor did i until saturday. I sent her a text; "I will be changing my cell phone carrier next month. If you want the number and to keep the account let me know before then. Also i will need our Comcast switched (my comcast is under her name and vice versa) as soon as possible. I want nothing to do with you anymore (the truth is i still love and want her back). Thanks." (Was this a big mistake? I wrote an apology text in the heat of the moment but never sent it. I feared this would give her further power and make me look even more weak. She never replied and i never tried to call to see if i am blocked. I didn't contact on sunday or monday. It is thursday today and i hope i can keep it up. There is nothing more i can do, i gotta to have some pride and self respect for myself. People say if you really love someone you would fight for them but she really isn't giving me a fighting chance and i am not trying to become a stalker. I decided to move on. I started talking to some other girl and when to hangout with her on sunday. I couldn't feel a thing and all i could do was think of my Ex. I am not ready, i am still too in love with my Ex. I do not want a rebound. So i told the other girl after we hung out and were about to leave: "Hey you are really a nice person and i really like you but it would be a bad idea and selfish on my part if we were to continue. I currently do not have the capacity to feel for someone else right and i really wise i could". She took it well and thanked me. We still do talk but there is no expectation. I do still love my Ex and want her back but i need to move on. She is giving me nothing to work with soo soo selfish. She even admitted it. Questions: What do you guys think is my Ex angle? I dont know if she truely wants to be alone or if she went with the other guy ( she told me that she told him everything but i cant take her for her words). Or is she soo ashamed that she cant be with me? Why would she show so much love and still be messing around? What do you guys think will happen down the road There have been other guys and situation that i either do not know the situation or have forgotten. I am pretty good at forgiving & forgetting and i am beginning to feel that that is a flaw. one i remember is that when i am around her is claims she never answer called that she doesn't know who it is. Who does that? Thanks and i hope you guys enjoyed the read!!! I hope to hear your take
ZiggyZoo Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 Walk away from this mess and never look back. I think that she's been fooling around on you this whole time, honestly. Her wanting/needing to have access to your phone and everything was just her projecting her actions onto you. She sounds like a selfish, jealous, self-centered person. To demand that you change classes because she had it in her head that the other girl liked you? This was a toxic relationship. She has some major trust issues, and you're never going to be able to get past them. Stay No Contact and move on. 3
PegNosePete Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 What do you guys think is my Ex angle? Why would she show so much love and still be messing around? What do you guys think will happen down the road Look, you need to stop asking these questions. You are analyzing the mind of an illogical, crazy person. Why in hell would you want her back after what she's done to you? Just stop all contact and you will feel better in time.
Fufu Posted April 16, 2015 Posted April 16, 2015 If you want to move on, you don't need her back in your life. Relationship is 2-ways.. if she's not into you anymore, it's hard to even make a relationship work. Move on, 3 years is pretty long and I do understand you invest your time and love in her. Time flies and in no time you probably wouldn't feel much hurt anymore. Just like at times I think back how my ex ended relationship back in October 2010. And today, I live my life happily and carefree and best of all having more self-esteem. 1
Author towch Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 I totally understand what you guys are saying. It is strange how a person can do a total on 180 on you lol. Its been 7 days NC, one day at a time. I felt this overwhelming urge to message my Ex because i couldn't understand how someone who was down right overly clingy could just 180 not give a ****. So i grabbed my phone ran to my car and locked it in the glovebox, then lock my keys in a safely box then lock the safety box key in my computer table drawer then took the drawer keys outside my landlord had this big lock where they keep keys and i locked it there. Got ready for work, i had calmed down by then and thought of how stupid it would have been if i did contact her and how painful it would have been if she didn't reply. Sigh.... One day at a time 1
BC1980 Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 I totally understand what you guys are saying. It is strange how a person can do a total on 180 on you lol. Its been 7 days NC, one day at a time. I felt this overwhelming urge to message my Ex because i couldn't understand how someone who was down right overly clingy could just 180 not give a ****. You're right. It is crazy that a person can do a 180, but that's your answer. She's not stable and is impulsive. You don't understand her behavior, so don't even try. People who act indecisive are bad news. I think that most of the time, they are simply not self-aware or are truly hanging onto you until they find someone else.
elaine567 Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Me: I miss you Ex: I miss ya too Me: Can we hangout something Ex: ummm as friends though?? Me: Yeah friends (I am upset) Ex: That sounds fun Me: Ok let me know when works for you (i am pathetic) She can miss you, she can love you, she can be upset, she can cry, she can hang out with you, she can cook for you, she can laugh at your jokes and smile at you, but in that sentence Ex: ummm as friends though??, she told you how she really thinks. She is NOT coming back. It was a messed up relationship anyway, so best not pursued any further. 1
Author towch Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 She can miss you, she can love you, she can be upset, she can cry, she can hang out with you, she can cook for you, she can laugh at your jokes and smile at you, but in that sentence Ex: ummm as friends though??, she told you how she really thinks. She is NOT coming back. It was a messed up relationship anyway, so best not pursued any further. Yup, even though she told me that she informed the other guys about the situation, my money is on that she lied about that and is still with him. It's the only thing that can explain her going cold on me (if i am to gauge things from her track record). I guess he is providing her with what she needs for now. I mean they say don't judge people by their past and i choose to do that. This crap she did to me was what she did to her Ex. The only difference between me and the other guys is that i will not be chasing for months on end. Well such is life guess
Chi townD Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Okay, going to be blunt here. Dude, you're a mess. Okay, let me break this down to you. You wrote that she was always jealous and checking your phone and accusing you of being interested in other girls. DUDE!!!! She was cheating on you! She was checking your stuff to see if she could find evidence of you messing around on her so she could ease the guilt that she may have been having for cheating on you! She would have thought to herself, "Oh look! He's messing around with this other girl! Now I don't feels so bad about being with this other dude!" Sad to think that she was HOPING to find something to pin on you, isn't it? Then she was talking to this other guy that was "just a friend". She guarded her phone like she was guarding a bank. She thought you saw something that you shouldn't have and; instead of asking you then, she calls you later to ask if you messed with her phone. Then you ask her if there' anything she needs to tell you, she says that she's "talking" to this other guy. If it was that innocent, the why was she crying? I'll tell you why. Talking= dating and screwing. Dude, she has been cheating on you this whole relationship. Time to cut ties and move on. Time to heal from this and start a hard NC. Time to start to make positive changes in your life. Time to focus on your studies and do well (that's what you're there for anyways). 1
Author towch Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Okay, going to be blunt here. Dude, you're a mess. Okay, let me break this down to you. You wrote that she was always jealous and checking your phone and accusing you of being interested in other girls. DUDE!!!! She was cheating on you! She was checking your stuff to see if she could find evidence of you messing around on her so she could ease the guilt that she may have been having for cheating on you! She would have thought to herself, "Oh look! He's messing around with this other girl! Now I don't feels so bad about being with this other dude!" Sad to think that she was HOPING to find something to pin on you, isn't it? Then she was talking to this other guy that was "just a friend". She guarded her phone like she was guarding a bank. She thought you saw something that you shouldn't have and; instead of asking you then, she calls you later to ask if you messed with her phone. Then you ask her if there' anything she needs to tell you, she says that she's "talking" to this other guy. If it was that innocent, the why was she crying? I'll tell you why. Talking= dating and screwing. Dude, she has been cheating on you this whole relationship. Time to cut ties and move on. Time to heal from this and start a hard NC. Time to start to make positive changes in your life. Time to focus on your studies and do well (that's what you're there for anyways). Damn...that was RAW Chi townD. You have made good points my friend, I would say she has screwed every guy because some of them were out of town or country. I have however realised how much of an attention whore she was. She clearly was incapable of turning down any attention. I guess i was there but truly not there. Word of advise people, if you meet any girl with a disney princess attitude and has fantasy dreams, RUN THE HELL AWAY. Keep it coming guys, i really really appreciate your comments.
Chi townD Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Sorry dude. I don't mean to come across as an ass. But, I just wanted you to open your eyes and see her for what she truly was during your relationship. She's not a nice person and sucks as a girlfriend. You didn't deserve that (and deep down, you know you didn't). You deserve so much better. You just have to write this off as just one more heartbreak before you meet the girl you're TRULY meant to be with. But, it's time to cut this one loose. It's time to heal and move on. Start a hard NC on her. 1
Author towch Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Sorry dude. I don't mean to come across as an ass. But, I just wanted you to open your eyes and see her for what she truly was during your relationship. She's not a nice person and sucks as a girlfriend. You didn't deserve that (and deep down, you know you didn't). You deserve so much better. You just have to write this off as just one more heartbreak before you meet the girl you're TRULY meant to be with. But, it's time to cut this one loose. It's time to heal and move on. Start a hard NC on her. No not at all. I actually appreciate the bluntness. Hard and direct
ZiggyZoo Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 Damn...that was RAW Chi townD. You have made good points my friend, I would say she has screwed every guy because some of them were out of town or country. I have however realised how much of an attention whore she was. She clearly was incapable of turning down any attention. I guess i was there but truly not there. Word of advise people, if you meet any girl with a disney princess attitude and has fantasy dreams, RUN THE HELL AWAY. Keep it coming guys, i really really appreciate your comments. Or if you meet a girl who insists on knowing exactly what you're up to, yet keeps her sh*t locked up like its Fort Knox, RUN. I learned about this projecting being a red flag from my ex-husband.
Author towch Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Or if you meet a girl who insists on knowing exactly what you're up to, yet keeps her sh*t locked up like its Fort Knox, RUN. I learned about this projecting being a red flag from my ex-husband. Oh lord she did this too. I remember an incident her i went to see a movie by myself which she know i tend to do anyways (i spontaneously just walk in and see a movie). So she calls me while the movie is on, i step out to answer the phone and tell her what i am up to. She goes off "Who is the B*tch you are with?". I am there like "wtf, I could have simply ignored your call for the duration and give you some lie to cover my bases". PROJECTION!!! lol 1
Author towch Posted April 17, 2015 Author Posted April 17, 2015 Oh, I bet THAT would've gone over really well! The more i talk to you guys the more my eyes opens 1
ZiggyZoo Posted April 17, 2015 Posted April 17, 2015 The more i talk to you guys the more my eyes opens That's where forums like this can really help. Sometimes we can get caught up in our own way of thinking or looking at something, it helps to have completely unbiased strangers weigh in. I've gotten such good advice from the people on here, and they've pointed out things I never noticed about my situation.
Author towch Posted April 22, 2015 Author Posted April 22, 2015 So i have one thread here talking about my issue, you can visit my page for the read if you like. How story short is that my Ex of 3 years was having an affair for the last 8+ months leading to the breakup. I wanted to reconcile, she wanted to find herself/be single (If that is even true, might be exploring her options). I initiated no contact for two weeks, she never contacted me one. Come the weekend of the 2nd week she contacts me. Needless to say i didn't hold my ground (something about her voice makes me weak). She insisted on being friends. my better judgement said no but i agree on the basis that communication wasn't only when she wanted. Anyways we talk a few that Saturday, Sunday and this past monday. She did all the contacting. She talked about how we should hangout and such. She also commented on spending her summer with me if i had tv channels (i only pay for internet). Come tuesday we didn't talk so i call her around 4pm, she didnt answer. i called at 6, she did not answer. I also sent a text in between. She call me aback around 830ish said sorry for not reaching me that she had been working (Needless to say when the going was good, work didn't shut her from reaching out). But the thing is that she was calling me to vent about something at work and i really wasn't in the mood because she was doing the same thing i asked her not to do. She picked up that my mood was off and asked me what was wrong, i said nothing. She say that she really doesn't have time for this that everyone is pissing her off. She said she had to go back to work and would call me when she gets off at 9pm. Come 9-930 she doesn't call and her phone is not ringing and going straight to voicemail. The call going to voicemail goes on till today around 12pm I am finally about to reach her. She didn't block me because i tried different phones. WHAT I TOLD HER I finally reached her and told her the following: The past months you have not been able to keep a single word you give me, you are not reliable and your words meaning nothing. This lead me to believe that you have no respect for me and you clearly do not love me. It is insanity to love someone unconditionally when they don't love you back. It is insanity to want to be with someone that doesn't respect you or your feeling. Maybe you are unaware why i chose to be friend with you, I did so because i had hope that at some point we would make up. I can no longer fool myself into doing that. I can not be friends with you while for feeling for you because the feeling will not go away and i will be damned if i was to watch find someone else while in that position. I know you are aware that for the past couple of day i have been conversing with someone (she works at t mobile and creeps on my call logs). But if you claim not to know i am letting you that i am talking to someone of a couple of days now. I dont know if i am ready, i don't know if it is too soon but at this point i have decide to try my hardest to see how things go. I am sure there is someone out there that would better appreciate my love and what i have to offer. On that note all forms of communication need to end and i am dead serious about it. If you choose you connect me it has to be about one thing and one thing alone and that is that you want to reconcile. If not scratch me out of your life. I wished her all the best and quickly got off the phone. I wouldn't let her talk because she will try to play the victim. I proceeded to block her on my phone and on skype. I don't follow her on facebook or instagram nor do i really use them. So far i have got 2 call blocked notification. She things i am bluffing this time
Chi townD Posted April 22, 2015 Posted April 22, 2015 If she work at T mobile, then I would talk to other carriers about switching if she has access to your call logs. 1
Jessie1231 Posted April 22, 2015 Posted April 22, 2015 The part about calling her constantly for days to tell her you wouldn't be calling anymore made me cringe a little. But it's ok to start over with no contact now, and an episode like that will definitely make you think twice before breaking it again.
Author towch Posted April 23, 2015 Author Posted April 23, 2015 (edited) lol, no it wasn't for days, not even up to a day. she called about 9 times which go blocked. then a text which i released to read (windows phone ). She texted about how she was having a bad day yesterday followed by her locking herself out hence why she didn't call me back. She is playing the sad/hurt card here unfortunately i have seen it sooooo many times lol. I won't be replying. For some reason it feels good, i feel like i got some power back. Edited April 23, 2015 by towch
Author towch Posted April 26, 2015 Author Posted April 26, 2015 Hi guys, its Sunday and i have been able to maintain NC since the initial breadcrumbs . I still get the barrage of emotions/thinking about her from time to time but i no longer feel the urge to call or text. Nor do i glance at my phone expecting a call from her. I will be changing my phone carrier on the 1st. Why you ask? it just has to do with logistics, i like all my bills to be due on the 1st if i can help it . Things are looking up, when out to the clubs with friends. They all were happy to see me (this is not something i did while in a relationship). It felt good, i felt appreciated, i also made friends too. I am trying to be more social
Author towch Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 Update: So i live in baltimore, im sure you all heard the news of the riot. Well i haven't spoken to my Ex since the last breadcrumb she served me. She didn't call to see if i was alright yesterday during the riot nor did i care. She calls me now, halfway through the next they. If i was dead or hurt, isnt the call too late already? lol. needless to say, i did not respond to the call. She sends me a text "Are you ok?". I did not respond. She called 9 more times. then sends me a text "I'm sorry for ignoring i dont think i can be friends yet because i am still in love with you". WTH??? i told her i couldn't be friends but she insisted. She is calling my office now. I wont be answering, let her have a taste of her own medicine.
Chi townD Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 Good! Stay NC and stay strong. And b careful, it's bat sh*t crazy out there from what I can see.
Author towch Posted April 28, 2015 Author Posted April 28, 2015 Good! Stay NC and stay strong. And b careful, it's bat sh*t crazy out there from what I can see. Thanks, where i live is actually quiet, didn't seem like something happen. So she has been blasting my cell and office phone non-stop. I haven't answered and never will. she texted this "Sorry for ignoring you i'm not ready to be your friend because i'm still in love with you i just want to know you're okay". Firstly, its too freaking late to be calling me about my safety. Not the same magnitude but people who had family around the twin towers did not wait till the next day to find out if they are ok. Secondly, She is the one that insisted we be friends, i was reluctant but accept on one condition that she did not ignore me. She did. Thirdly, I see through her BS. Her initial contact was just a casual contact so that she doesn't seem like a douchbag. Just like i would have texted her a "Happy Birthday" so im not an ass. She doesn't care about my safety, she most likely knows i'm fine and is just panicking because i have never ignored her come good or bad. I believe she is in panic mode because maybe it has clicked that she might actually be losing me.
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