ThatMathGuy Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 First let me say I had no idea an awesome community like this existed. The support I've seen from the commutity is amazing and look forward to 'paying-it-forward' so thanks in advance! After reading about the online dating scene and not having a lot of time to devote to finding dates in person, I've decided to give it a shot. I consider myself to be very methodical and have done a lot of research on the matter, but seeing such awesome responses from this commutity, it made sense to ask here. To summarize, I love making the people around me laugh, and I figured an amusing profile would be an interesting change to the plethora of lackluster profiles we've read. However, I'm sure there is a thing as too funny. What do you think? Anyone currentl on Match.com can find the profile u/m: ThatMathGuy235 In your own words Do you recall that moment in the movie Anchorman starring Will Ferrell where Ron Burgundy was applauded by the audience onto the stage to perform his famous "jazz flute" scene. Ron emphatically proclaims how unprepared he is as he pulls out an assembled flute from his jacket's sleeve and then begins to jump from table to table, and even turns his flute into an alcohol-fueled blowtorch! Though I may not be able to turn my flute into a musical blowtorch nor do I have "many leatherbound books," or even an "apartment which smells of rich mohagony," I *am* an aspiring musician, a real life scientist, a self proclaimed chef, and a molder of minds both young and old. Most importantly, I can play the jazz flute. Monday through Friday, I am a Mathemagician. Yes that is a real word, Wikipedia has a page on it - so it *must* be true! As a teacher, I encourage confidence and a passion for the esoteric study of mathematics. With the flick of my favorite Expo marker, I make the "scary" math word problems go away, disappear if you will, followed by a slice of my favorite banana cream pie because how else am I supposed to celebrate March 14th (Pi day)? When not enlightening minds, I consider myself to be a musician. Though I am not too sure since I don't have a rockstar attitude, or a record label but I do have a degree in music (its almost as useless as it sounds but it does mean I can play a lot of scales). Did I mention I can play the flute, or the jazz flute to be more precise? No? How about the piano? Or the Ukulele? Yes I had to google how spell Ukulele, but its ok because I'm willing to bet you couldn't spell the word either. Close your eyes and give it a try...don't cheat! I'm also a real life scientist. Its true! There is a published paper out there somewhere, with the word "author" written next to my name. I'm a lot like the characters on The Big Bang Theory, which is one of my favorite shows. Except, I study computer science and mathematics as opposed to physics, and I know how to talk to women. Also, I'm not as socially awkward, well not nearly as much anyway, ok maybe a little bit. No the jazz flute does not help with that. Ask me how my next iOS application is going to earn me millions! Did you know IBM is devloping an artificial intelligence which can predict how a meal will taste by the ingredient list alone? I wonder what the machine will have to say about my homemade fettuccine alfredo. I hope it likes Italian food because I love cooking Italian food, slightly overshadowed by my desire to eat Italian food. Don't ask for my sauce recipe because it's a secret, though you're more than welcome to have some. All joking and puns aside, if you are still reading, I hope you laughed, at least once, even if it was a slight chuckle or smile. I strive to bring smiles to the faces of my students, family, friends, and those around me. I have a passion for education and my hobbies which to my fortune are one in the same. I don't go to bars, nightclubs or raves (but techno music is still super fun to listen to). I am working towards a Masters and someday my PhD because I love to learn almost as much as I love a good puzzle or riddle. I'm not expecting to find the "love-of-my-life" on here but I will be happy to find a long-term serious relationship with a woman who enjoys long conversations, live music (not necessarily from me), and surprise flower deliveries at work. Send me a message and lets chat. Favorite Hot Spots Does my office at CSUB count, since I spend most of my time there anyway? When not working, any place I can relax like a comfortable couch, Lengthwise, Starbucks, or even plugging away at the computer. Favorite Things I can appreciate most music but a good movie soundtrack or classical music are definitely my favorites. My favorite foods are anything Italian. I am on a life-long quest to make a perfect fettuccine alfredo For Fun For fun, I like to pay a visit to the Melodrama for an hour of sustainable laughter, I also enjoy playing board games with friends, practicing an instrument, composing music, programming the next big iOS app, a quick trip to the beach, or cooking Last Read Artficial Intelligence - A Modern Approach (do course textbooks count?), The Legend of Zelda and Philosophy: I Link Therefore I Am (Definitely a cheesy title but still an interesting read if you're interested in Philosophy)
fitnessfan365 Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 (edited) I know that you're looking for feedback from women. But as a guy that has had pretty good online success, I wanted to offer some advice. 1) Treat your profile like a movie teaser trailer. - Highlight while being somewhat vague (save details/specifics for actual conversations) - A few funny remarks (too much comedy makes it seem like you're trying too hard) - A little bit of flirting (a bit of sexual mystique is a good thing) - Avoid being repetitive (your profile keeps repeating in one way or another that you're a math teacher that loves music.) You want to intrigue a woman to respond to find out more. Your profile comes off more like a long winded biography. If they know every aspect of your routine and lifestyle, why bother getting to know you? Plus, you have to remember that the average person out there has a very short attention span. A good percentage of women would look at your profile and not even bother reading. 2) Sound more certain about what you want. Using phrases like "I'm not expecting to" and "I hope to" , etc make it sound like you're wishy washy and don't have clear cut standards. It's just as important to expand on your ideal type of woman, as it is to talk about yourself. You want women to read your wants/needs and automatically be qualifying themselves asking if it's them. Women want a guy they have to work for and earn affection with. Edited April 15, 2015 by fitnessfan365 3
Author ThatMathGuy Posted April 15, 2015 Author Posted April 15, 2015 (edited) I know that you're looking for feedback from women. But as a guy that has had pretty good online success, I wanted to offer some advice. 1) Treat your profile like a movie teaser trailer. - Highlight while being somewhat vague (save details/specifics for actual conversations) - A few funny remarks (too much comedy makes it seem like you're trying too hard) - A little bit of flirting (a bit of sexual mystique is a good thing) - Avoid being repetitive (your profile keeps repeating in one way or another that you're a math teacher that loves music.) You want to intrigue a woman to respond to find out more. Your profile comes off more like a long winded biography. If they know every aspect of your routine and lifestyle, why bother getting to know you? Plus, you have to remember that the average person out there has a very short attention span. A good percentage of women would look at your profile and not even bother reading. 2) Sound more certain about what you want. Using phrases like "I'm not expecting to" and "I hope to" , etc make it sound like you're wishy washy and don't have clear cut standards. It's just as important to expand on your ideal type of woman, as it is to talk about yourself. You want women to read your wants/needs and automatically be qualifying themselves asking if it's them. Women want a guy they have to work for and earn affection with. I appreciate the advice no matter which gender it is from. Thank you, your response answered many questions. Version Two Do you recall that moment in the movie Anchorman starring Will Ferrell where Ron Burgundy was applauded by the audience onto the stage to perform his famous "jazz flute" scene. Ron emphatically proclaims how unprepared he is as he pulls out an assembled flute from his jacket's sleeve and then begins to jump from table to table, and even turns his flute into an alcohol-fueled blowtorch! Though I may not be able to turn a flute into a musical blowtorch nor do I have "many leatherbound books," or even an "apartment which smells of rich mohagony," I *am* an aspiring musician, a real life scientist, a self-proclaimed chef, and a molder of minds. Monday through Friday, I am a Mathemagician. Yes that is a real word, Wikipedia has a page on it - so it *must* be true! As a teacher, I encourage confidence and a passion for the esoteric study of mathematics. I love cooking Italian food which is slightly overshadowed by my desire to eat Italian food. I strive to bring smiles to the faces of my students, family, friends, and those around me. I have a passion for education and my hobbies which to my fortune are one in the same. I don't go to bars, nightclubs or raves (but techno music is still super fun to listen to). I am working towards a Masters and someday my PhD because I love to learn almost as much as I love a good puzzle or riddle. If not the love-of-my-life, I am happy to find a long-term serious relationship with a woman who enjoys long conversations, live music (not necessarily from me), and surprise flower deliveries at work. Send me a message and lets chat. Edited April 15, 2015 by ThatMathGuy
fitnessfan365 Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 (edited) It's good that you shortened the length a bit. But the Anchorman reference and everything attached to it is complete overkill. You'd be better off saving that reference for conversation if a woman asks about your jazz flute. Also, still way too much info divulged and you could use a bit more specifics on your ideal woman. So if I was writing your profile, this is what I'd do with the info you provided : " Ladies, I like to think of myself as a reason to add Van Halen's "Hot For Teacher" to your playlist. By day, I'm known as a "Mathemagician" to my students that inspires confidence and passion for math. By night, I'm a chef in training that is fully ready to dazzle you with a variety of Italian cuisine. Plus, as a real life scientist, chemistry is a specialty of mine. ;-) Aside from making people laugh, and playing my Jazz flute religiously, there's nothing I like more than a good riddle or puzzle. Let's solve one together. Since I'm not into the bar or club scene, online dating is a great way for me to put myself out there. My ultimate goal is to be in a long term relationship with the right woman. Not only would she be beautiful and specialize in intelligent communication, but she'd appreciate live music and the occasional flower delivery from yours truly. If this sounds like you, let's get to know each other better." Edited April 15, 2015 by fitnessfan365 1
Toodaloo Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 Where is Peg Nose? He is good at this stuff too. Between him and FF you will have a great profile. 1
Author ThatMathGuy Posted April 15, 2015 Author Posted April 15, 2015 It's good that you shortened the length a bit. But the Anchorman reference and everything attached to it is complete overkill. You'd be better off saving that reference for conversation if a woman asks about your jazz flute. Also, still way too much info divulged and you could use a bit more specifics on your ideal woman. So if I was writing your profile, this is what I'd do with the info you provided : " Ladies, I like to think of myself as a reason to add Van Halen's "Hot For Teacher" to your playlist. By day, I'm known as a "Mathemagician" to my students that inspires confidence and passion for math. By night, I'm a chef in training that is fully ready to dazzle you with a variety of Italian cuisine. Plus, as a real life scientist, chemistry is a specialty of mine. ;-) Aside from making people laugh, and playing my Jazz flute religiously, there's nothing I like more than a good riddle or puzzle. Let's solve one together. Since I'm not into the bar or club scene, online dating is a great way for me to put myself out there. My ultimate goal is to be in a long term relationship with the right woman. Not only would she be beautiful and specialize in intelligent communication, but she'd appreciate live music and the occasional flower delivery from yours truly. If this sounds like you, let's get to know each other better." I'm definitely inclined to think FF knows his way around a pen. Bravo sir, bravo!
lana-banana Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 Lady here. 1) Please nix the entire Anchorman thing. Please. 2) Move the Italian food thing to the end of the following paragraph so it flows better. 3) "Love of my life" isn't hyphenated; "let's" has an apostrophe. 4) FF's recommendations are good but I would take out the emoticon. 5) "Scientist. Chef. Molder of minds" could be a good tagline for the top/title of your page. To be honest, if you were good looking and made all this sound slightly less awkward, I would probably hit you up. My current boyfriend is a nerdy scientist and computer programmer who loves cooking and philosophy too. And with that I would add one of the turn-offs about your original draft was the way you talked about being a scientist. I don't know about where you live, but in my city there are millions of people in every profession. I found your original description condescending. Would you really want to date someone who didn't understand scientists anyhow? 1
losangelena Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 (edited) 'Nother lady here. I'm with everyone else - nix the Anchorman bit. If I were to see your profile online, I would be more inclined to roll my eyes than chuckle. It sounds more cheesy than funny (no offense, my sense of humor is dry as a bone), and generally, I wouldn't want to be told that you're trying to make me laugh; the best profiles are the ones that just do make me laugh. Length is an issue - you go on and on in that beginning section, but the rest of of the sections are almost too short. Fitnessfan is right - shorten it. You need fewer details but more specifics, if that makes sense. As a woman, I have no idea what you're really looking for, and you contradict yourself when you say you're NOT looking for the love of you're life, but you DO want a long term committed relationship. Huh? I get that maybe you said that so as to not scare anyone away, but really, it's okay to be clear about what you're after. It is a dating site, after all, and you can choose to say something other than "love of my life." Other notes: Too long in general - ain't nobody got time for that Remember your audience - adult women in their 20s and 30s, presumably (I don't know how old you are). In parts of this you sound like you're in teacher mode. I had a coupe other thoughts, but they've slipped my mind. Good luck! Edited to say: at the end of the day, what's in your profile will not matter after the first couple of dates. When I was on OLD, rarely was there a profile that blew me away. There was one that so grabbed me once, that I messaged the guy and basically told him we were gonna meet and that was that, end of discussion. We ended up going out a handful of times, but it didn't work out in the end. I had gotten so jaded with the whole process that by the time my now-BF approached me online, I was so happy that he simply didn't sound crazy, that what he did write in his profile barely registered. He'll occasionally make reference to something in his profile, and I'll say, honey, I can't remember a damn thing about it. What I'm trying to say is, don't worry. Yes, tweak your profile; make it sound the way you want - because it will make a difference in the people you attract. But, it's not the end game in all this - it's only the beginning. Edited April 15, 2015 by losangelena 3
Toodaloo Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 I appreciate the advice no matter which gender it is from. Thank you, your response answered many questions. Version Two Amended by moi I wish I could turn a flute into a musical blowtorch. I wish I had many leatherbound books, and an apartment which smells of rich mohagony. I *am* an aspiring musician, a real life scientist, a self-proclaimed chef, and a molder of minds. Monday through Friday, I am a Mathemagician. Yes that is a real word, Wikipedia has a page on it - so it *must* be true! As a teacher, I encourage confidence and a passion for mathematics. I love cooking Italian food which is overshadowed by my desire to eat Italian food. I strive to bring smiles to the faces of my students, family, friends, and those around me. I have a passion for education and my hobbies which to my fortune are one in the same. I don't go to bars, nightclubs or raves (but techno music is still super fun to listen to). I am working towards a Masters and someday my PhD because I love to learn almost as much as I love a good puzzle or riddle. I am looking for a long-term serious relationship with a woman who enjoys long conversations, live music (not necessarily from me), and surprise flower deliveries at work in the hope to find the one thats for me. Send me a message and lets chat. how does that read? 2
PegNosePete Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 Toodaloo's version is a lot better, can you tell she's had quite a lot of practice reading them?
Toodaloo Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 Toodaloo's version is a lot better, can you tell she's had quite a lot of practice reading them? Thats embarrassing... But yes... I read the profile of every single person who contacted me, all the way through... and some others that were highlighted or had a good picture and I was being nosey... bit like shopping on Amazon I like the ones that were fun and showed a bit of personality with out being too much to read or too informative... After all I want to have something to find out about you when I meet you! If anyone used words that were a bit "high brow" I would normally go back later when I had more time to think about it rather than read through there and then... Sometimes I would end up too busy so wouldn't go back hence why I have deleted some words. I am afraid I am just one person though. There are loads on these dating sites and all have differing opinions! Also I have had dates from OK Cupid but no one wanted to talk to me on mysinglefriend and I am still single so I don't know how much my opinion is worth... 1
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 As a guy, it looked pretty good overall (I viewed from Match since I'm a member).. Thought it would be a trainwreck but not bad. Your photos are mostly good too. I don't want to get into small details so I'd follow everyone else's advice for small improvements
Jessie1231 Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 I just checked your profile on match also - it looks good now. My only suggestions would be - move the one of you beside the piano closer to the front because that is a really good one. Also, under hot spots you have a place listed which might be where you work? That may not be the actual name of your company but if it is, maybe remove that because you never know what kind of crazy person you may meet so I would keep my employer private for a while. 2
Throldur Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 Not going to post any suggestions since my profile is awful.. I'm just commenting to say this is a good idea and I'll probably start a thread for my own some day soon.
smackie9 Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 All I can say is, keep it simple and short. The movie teaser ideal is what I would be looking for in a profile. Women like a little teasing and mystery, not a point by point of every aspect of your life. It's all about selling yourself, and being able to capture their attention. Since you are amongst many profiles, people don't want to spend time reading over every detail. Tho a good profile is an important part of OLD, the photos take top priority. If you have great photos, you can pretty much write misc stuff like I enjoy eating cheese, and you will have hits. 1
deathandtaxes Posted April 15, 2015 Posted April 15, 2015 Keep it short. AND HIRE A PHOTOGRAPHER FOR GOOD PICTURES!!! It doesn't matter what your profile says if you can't hook em in first with a decent picture. Your write-up seems decent enough. But us guys and gals are image-driven. And OLD is such a meat-grinder for that.
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