na49 Posted April 29, 2015 Posted April 29, 2015 Can you block his number? That helped me a lot. I'd always have a mini heart attack when my phone went off because I thought it would be her. You probably won't want to do that because you want him to contact you, but if your ex wants to contact you, he will do ANYTHING to contact you. My ex was blocked everywhere, so she emailed my school email, and made a fake Facebook account when she wanted to contact me. Some people may disagree with me on this, but I think that hoping he'll come back is okay. Especially early on. If you can accept that you want him to come back, but not let it drag you down, you can live with it. If you are waiting by the phone, or sitting in your room hoping that he calls, that's obviously not a good idea.
Author Faded264 Posted April 29, 2015 Author Posted April 29, 2015 (edited) Can you block his number? That helped me a lot. I'd always have a mini heart attack when my phone went off because I thought it would be her. You probably won't want to do that because you want him to contact you, but if your ex wants to contact you, he will do ANYTHING to contact you. My ex was blocked everywhere, so she emailed my school email, and made a fake Facebook account when she wanted to contact me. Some people may disagree with me on this, but I think that hoping he'll come back is okay. Especially early on. If you can accept that you want him to come back, but not let it drag you down, you can live with it. If you are waiting by the phone, or sitting in your room hoping that he calls, that's obviously not a good idea. I deleted his number, and don't have it memorized, so I can't really block him at this point. There's nothing that I can do or say to make things better. I just know that, whether he comes back or not, I don't want to be the same person 3 or 6 months down the road. I don't want to get into another relationship as the same "old me". I want to evolve. I want to grow beyond this, to have a full life again, to be completely happy on my own. Sometimes the desire for him overwhelms me, and at other times I'm happy not having to wait for his text, or wonder what his intentions are. Thanks for all the kind words everyone! I'm doing the best I can, and that's all that matters. Edited April 29, 2015 by Faded264 1
TunaCat Posted April 30, 2015 Posted April 30, 2015 I'm on day 36 and I promise you that it does get easier. 1
Author Faded264 Posted April 30, 2015 Author Posted April 30, 2015 Day 3 and I'm hanging in there. I know 3 days is nothing. I realized this morning that whether I'm happy or miserable during this time, has no effect on whether he'll come back. It doesn't matter if I sit here and think about him all the time, if I think constantly about what happened, if I wonder what he's doing right now. None of that matters in the end. I can sit here and torture myself thinking about all of that, or I can choose to be happy and leave these thoughts behind me. Thinking about those things will change nothing, it will only make me more unhappy. Now the challenge is to make myself so busy, that I have no time to dwell on these things.
Author Faded264 Posted May 1, 2015 Author Posted May 1, 2015 Day 4, and I realized today how selfish he was. Or maybe it has to do with how little backbone I had. I liked him so much, I didn't want to upset him. Meanwhile, he was upsetting me. I gave and gave and gave, and he took and took and took. I had a dream he texted me. I woke up and was dissappointed, but I shook it off. I've been going to a local lake to walk around every day. Two and a half miles around. I paid off the rest of my debt the other day. Now I'm working on my goal to save for a house. I should have enough money by the end of the year. I want to be happy, more than anything. And I'll work toward that goal every single day.
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