DenverDude Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 Hi All - It's been a while since I have posted on this site, and I guess the reason that I am posting today is because that I seem to have hit a rut again with my healing process. It's already been over 5 months - and for some reason I feel like I just cannot forget her and move on. I hate to admit this, but in the last few weeks I've sent her a few short texts and even an email. Not a peep. She's probably got me blocked - but it's driving me crazy. I just need to realize that she is gone for good, but I cant. It's hard. Seems she is avoiding me at all costs. I cant talk to my friends or family about her anymore because too be honest they probably are sick and tired of it. So I bottle everything up and get these moments of sadness that are really hard to overcome. I appreciate you guys taking time to read this. I guess I just needed to vent. Thanks again. Link to post Share on other sites
FortunateSon Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 How long was your relationship? Link to post Share on other sites
Author DenverDude Posted April 13, 2015 Author Share Posted April 13, 2015 Thanks for taking time to reply. We dated for about 3 years. We also lived together for about a year. That always seems to make things EXTRA hard when coping through heartbreak. Link to post Share on other sites
FortunateSon Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 I've been there on more than one occasion. 5 months is not that long in the grand scheme of things considering a 3 year relationship/cohabitation. I found in my experience that healing is not linear, it ebbs and flows with progress and set backs. There is not set time on healing, everyone does it at there own pace. I have had two 6 year relationship break-ups and both took me over a year to get over. On this site I really found out about No Contact and how helpful it can be in healing. I would suggest that from hear on out, no more text or emails, block her in anyway, and if you family and friends need a break from venting, look for some support on her or from a counselor. You are not alone! Link to post Share on other sites
fireflywy Posted April 13, 2015 Share Posted April 13, 2015 Greetings to you Denverdude from just north of the border. It sucks, it does. Take all the time you need. There is no set date. And hey, when you do get over all of this, at least you're living in a place where there are lots of attractive ladies. Link to post Share on other sites
lolablue17 Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 When people find it hard to cope after a 2-3 month, I think it's only an Ego issue. I know for my self that i can recover from lost love very shortly, If the break up didn't contain any ego problems. That's why it's much easier for the dumper. Not because they're out of love. Sometimes the dumper is not sure and still loves his\her partner. But when you're the one who dumps, you get the upper hand, you get the control, you can plan, you have the element of surprise on your side. I remember two GF (a long time ago). With each one of them (not simultaneously ) i got the feelings that they're checking out, or going to... With the first, I broke up with her before she managed to do it her self. I got the control, and i healed very quickly. Now, listen to what happen with the second one. I told her that i'm breaking up with her, and checked out. For two long days she begged and pleaded, and told me that i'm the one for her, she had BFs but me is the first one she ever loved, Bla bla bla, I took her back, only for her to dump me about a week later. Until today when i think of her, I am filled with rage. I never 100% healed even that i don't really care about her, i don't love her, Etc... Pure Ego problem. In this game she won, I lost. So, if you look at it that way, you will know better how to heal because you'll spot the exact reason of your insecurity and misery. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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