Do guys think this is a compliment?

[HansonGirl]

I was talking to a guy from online, and he keeps inserting a lot of sexual innuendos into the conversation. he said he wants to meet, and I told him I wasn't sure yet. He kept making "jokes" that were all sex related. I have sex and all, but I hadn't met this guy yet, and he wants to meet. The first message he sent to me was a short-one-liner at 4am, and there is pretty much nothing on his profile. So anyways, after chatting with him a few times over the course of a couple days (so we weren't talking for a long long time), he asked me if we're gonna meet. i so tell him that I wasn't sure If i wanted to meet, because I am getting the vibe that he is only interested in sex. his profile does say he's looking for a long term relationship. To test what he'd do, i told im i just got out of a long term relationship 2 weeks ago. That did not seem to bother him. Which i know that was wrong to do that, but i just wanted to see how this guy would react, because i was already convinced he wasn't serious. He still wanted to meet, even though there'd be no way i'd be emotionally available for anything serious.

 

Anyways, I digress. So after i tell him my concerns, he tells me that he hasn't had sex in months, and went on a date the day before and did not try to have sex with the girl. I asked him why is he online asking if we want to meet the next day after he had a date? So he says, that I shouldn't "flatter myself" because he is not trying to have a booty call with me.

 

What on earth would be "flattering" about that? I ultimately told him that maybe it's best if we stop talking and told him that i was not interested in meeting. But why do guys think that the idea of a guy just wanted a girl for sex is supposed to be some sort of compliment? Something about the conversation convinced me that he wouldn't be a good person to meet, even if he wasn't looking for sex anyways, but I am still curious about this.

 

I wasn't trying to flatter myself, I am trying to be cautious and protect myself. I just don't want to waste my time going out with someone who might just want sex! He wasn't exactly making a great impression and i hadn't even met him yet. I even explained that i was just trying to be cautious , and that women need to be careful with internet dating. His response was that he "has nothing against that."

The conversation ended sort of with an argument, and I didn't mean to string him along by any means but i am not going to meet some stranger without getting to know them a little bit. But almost everything he said kept turning to sex. Then he tells me not to "flatter myself" and yet still wants to meet me for some reason... he didn't seem very nice.

 

Anyways, sorry for rambling! Just interested in a discussion. not talking to this guy any more so obviously not looking for advice as to him. But i guess if i'm totally wrong about this, i need to hear it!

Edited April 13, 2015 by HansonGirl

[casey.lives]

i think that's just laziness on the guys part. guy's know how to play on girls emotions, being sweet or sad or heroic. This guy didn't give a crap. You were just the first person to walk through the door. it wasn't you

[GemmaUK]

He was just one of the ones who got angry because he wasn't getting what he wanted and you sussed him out.

There are quite a few men like that on OLD unfortunately.

 

 

'Don't flatter yourself' was a sarcastic and passive aggressive term.

 

 

It's best to just stop talking to guys who get into sexual jokes or conversations before you have ever even met.

[PegNosePete]

He is only looking for sex. When choosing who to respond to online, don't respond to the ones who talk about sex, the ones with crappy or blank profiles, the ones who make sexual jokes before even meeting you. These are the guys who are only looking for sex. You can spot them a mile off. Short 1-liner from a bad profile at 4am is clearly just after sex. The correct response is no response.

 

Go for the ones with quality profiles who treat you with respect.