MySugaree Posted April 16, 2005 Posted April 16, 2005 The problem with the sexual dream partner hypothetical is that leaves alot out. Appearances moral being important on public message boards I suspect that most would "tut tut" and proudly proclaim "No." Appearances matter, even in cyber space and most of us wear our moral responsibility hat when we type away, here. But context matters, even more than size. I could expand upon the bare bones hypo by adding that the Dream Other ('DO") is a close friend and confidante, boatloads of fun, extremely witty and intelligent and absolutely gorgeous. Now throw alcohol into this incendiary mix and watch the sparks fly. Sure, some will hold out, but many others will go for the ring. I probably would under the above heated conditions.
moimeme Posted April 16, 2005 Posted April 16, 2005 Hypothesis: or I might start thinking you take yourself as seriously as Moi does. Evidence: My point is that given the set of circumstances above (read it carefully), most people would do it. And don't bullshyt yourself into thinking they won't. Still think it's a joke?
alphamale Posted April 16, 2005 Posted April 16, 2005 Originally posted by MySugaree Sure, some will hold out, but many others will go for the ring. I probably would under the above heated conditions. I rest my case
SadAndLonely Posted April 16, 2005 Posted April 16, 2005 No. It's like stealing or anything else you hear in those stupid scenario questions. I wouldn't do it because of my OWN sense of pride and self-worth. I've never truly cared what other people thought of my actions, because ultimately, I only answer to myself. For the record, I don't drink, and I'm with my SO for a reason. If I wanted to be with someone else that badly, I'd find a way to do it or not be with my current SO. I don't settle. So for me, he IS my "dream guy". At least, right now he is, because he's been very sweet to me throughout my health crisis.
meanon Posted April 19, 2005 Posted April 19, 2005 LucreziaBorgia: fantasy-wise, I'd say hell yes! It would be the ultimate "zipless f*ck". Realistically, though - I'm not so sure.... I enjoy the idea of it far more than I would the ultimately awkward reality of it. This echos an interesting distinction between the moral comfort zones of the potentially attainable dream and the highly unlikely fantasy. The closer that dream scenarios are to reality, the more unsettling the moral implications may be. That's probably why celebrity fantasies are so popular. Their inaccessibility (hence "safety") is critical to their attraction. It's the same phenomenon that makes teenagers fall into the arms of pop stars. Their remoteness makes them less threatening, the fantasy is powerful enough to overcome the reservations caused by reality. Of course the causes of the perceived threat are different: emotional immaturity rather than the potential negative impact on an existing relationship. That may make a difference to the eventual outcome but the cynic in me suspects not.
Linlin Posted April 19, 2005 Posted April 19, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale My point is that given the set of circumstances above (read it carefully), most people would do it. And don't bullshyt yourself into thinking they won't. When I was married, NEVER. I am the most monogomous person going!! Now that I am not married or in a serious relationship, all bets are off.
HokeyReligions Posted April 19, 2005 Posted April 19, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Look JOHAN, did u or did u not read the original question up above??? Here it is again below: If you could have a sexual encounter with the person(s) of your dreams, and not get caught (or catch any diseases) by your significant other, would you? My point is that given the set of circumstances above (read it carefully), most people would do it. And don't bullshyt yourself into thinking they won't. If I could have sex with Cameron Diaz and not get caught or have any other overt repricussions then I would most definitely do it. And so would many others. SHOW me the statistics that support your "most people would" theory. Maybe the people in your circle of friends would behave that way, but the I believe that the majority of adults in loving relationships would not---under ANY circumstances. YOU are BS'ing yourself because you don't want to acknowledge that there are people with different morals than you. ---No absolutely not for me, and I have 100% confidence that my husband would feel the same way.
whichwayisup Posted April 19, 2005 Posted April 19, 2005 In a perfect world, where noone would get hurt or mad? I'm sure alot would. But it's not a perfect world...Feelings and alot of emotions are involved. Interesting thread though. I would not have sex with anybody else but my husband.
Pocky Posted April 19, 2005 Posted April 19, 2005 Originally posted by Lucky Dog If you could have a sexual encounter with the person(s) of your dreams, and not get caught (or catch any diseases) by your significant other, would you? I don't have a person of my dreams that I'd like to have a sexual encounter. There are famous people that I find intriguing and attractive (ex. Johnny Depp, Gary Oldman, Chow Yun-Fat, Vince Rhames), but I have absolutely no interest or have even fantasized about sleeping with them.
LittleMiss Posted April 19, 2005 Posted April 19, 2005 I wouldn't want to be with anyone else other than the man I'm with now. I do not, will not, and just can't see myself wanting another man to be intimate with. Right now the man I have IS the man of my dreams and I'm extremely happy with him and would do nothing to ruin our relationship.
followingthru Posted April 21, 2005 Posted April 21, 2005 it's great to hear that alpha male wouldn't even feel guilty about cheating on his significant other and lying about it forever. maybe i could do that thing where both myself and my partner had a list - or maybe just one person we could cheat with once, but we'd be honest about it... haha johnny depp! actually, that wouldn't be a very smart choice. whatever.
Merin Posted April 21, 2005 Posted April 21, 2005 No I wouldn't do it.. Funny thing is this.. My BF now is anything but perfect.. we have our up's and down's and still I wouldn't cheat on him even if he never found out.
HoldOn Posted April 21, 2005 Posted April 21, 2005 Never! Not only would it eat me up afterward, I don't think I could even allow a person other than my bf to get close to me in that way. The other night, I had a dream that I cheated on my bf. But get this... the way I cheated was that I HUGGED Mark Walhberg. In the dream, I felt horrible. Someone asked me later if Mark Walhberg was on my "list" (of celebrities that you'd be allowed to hook up with), but I don't believe in the "list." I think it's gross and somewhat degrading to a relationship.... for me anyway.
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