notaneatfreak Posted April 12, 2015 Posted April 12, 2015 I was in a FWB with this guy. We were getting to be more than friends and I wanted more. I just got dumped over text he told me to cool it off with him for a while. After I invited him to hang out for some festivities which is what we normally did before. "cool it" he said. He couldn't call or tell me to my face? Why do people who call themselves "men" do this?
erklat Posted April 12, 2015 Posted April 12, 2015 Because he sees no romantic future with you whatsoever. He tries to avoid you because he's feeling guilty for hurting you and he tries to ease it. 2
ZiggyZoo Posted April 12, 2015 Posted April 12, 2015 Because you were just FRIENDS with benefits, and friends don't owe each other the same respect that someone in an actual relationship would deserve. I don't see how you can really call it a dumping, since you weren't together. 1
PinkElephants Posted April 13, 2015 Posted April 13, 2015 He did the right thing. It would have been wrong for him to continue giving you hope if he sees no future with you. He stuck to the rules, you tried to change them. Attacking his manhood because he won't do what you want is a classless low blow. Act like a lady. Now he has an angry, demanding, emotional, former sex buddy who thinks he isn't a man and you seriously don't know why he doesn't want to hang out with you? In case your next question is whether or not he's going to come back, my guess is no. I've seen this play out. My friend was sleeping with a really pretty, really nice girl and after about 3 months she decided she wanted a relationship. He ended the arrangement as any gentleman would because it was wrong to continue exploiting her for sex. She responded by demanding friendship and sex. Maybe she thought if she couldn't have his heart she could have his body or maybe she thought spending more time would make him fall for her, I don't know. He cut her off completely and never looked back because it wasn't what he signed up for. He has a girlfriend now and treats her like gold but the FWB was never a dating option because, as much as she thought she was amazing, he never saw her as anything but sex. 4
casey.lives Posted April 13, 2015 Posted April 13, 2015 it's better that way. it makes it infinitely easier to get over the person and it nullifies possibilities. i like to be cold when im over it. still but breaking up over text is ..... yeah that person committed suicide. they're dead to me
Author notaneatfreak Posted April 13, 2015 Author Posted April 13, 2015 He did the right thing. It would have been wrong for him to continue giving you hope if he sees no future with you. He stuck to the rules, you tried to change them. Attacking his manhood because he won't do what you want is a classless low blow. Act like a lady. Now he has an angry, demanding, emotional, former sex buddy who thinks he isn't a man and you seriously don't know why he doesn't want to hang out with you? In case your next question is whether or not he's going to come back, my guess is no. I've seen this play out. My friend was sleeping with a really pretty, really nice girl and after about 3 months she decided she wanted a relationship. He ended the arrangement as any gentleman would because it was wrong to continue exploiting her for sex. She responded by demanding friendship and sex. Maybe she thought if she couldn't have his heart she could have his body or maybe she thought spending more time would make him fall for her, I don't know. He cut her off completely and never looked back because it wasn't what he signed up for. He has a girlfriend now and treats her like gold but the FWB was never a dating option because, as much as she thought she was amazing, he never saw her as anything but sex. No well he then said he didn't want to hurt me. I am like you could have called or told me to my face. I wanted friendship, he wanted friendship, then out of nowhere he cut me off completely.
sutsie Posted April 13, 2015 Posted April 13, 2015 yeah i got dumped after 3 years on the anniversary of my father's death by a text message. I'd say my problems trump yours. 1
PinkElephants Posted April 13, 2015 Posted April 13, 2015 In your other threads you say you love him. It's about once a month that you come here saying you love him, you want to be with him, and he's being crystal clear about not wanting a relationship but you insist on calling it mixed signals. How many times has he told you to your face that he doesn't want a relationship and you chose to ignore it and keep f*cking him in the hopes that he'd date you? He's told you enough times. Also, this likely wasn't out of nowhere. This has probably been building up for him because you keep professing your love and he doesn't feel the same way. Be honest, you didn't want just friendship. I think you're claiming that now as a means of back pedaling and attempting to stay in his life. I'm sorry you're hurt but you did this to yourself by not listening to him when he said he didn't want a girlfriend. 4
No Limit Posted April 13, 2015 Posted April 13, 2015 Why are you upset? He's doing the right thing. He noticed you wanted more, he broke it off instead of keeping you around and letting you hope while he continues to enjoy the easy sex. Do yourself a favor and distance yourself from him too instead of thinking you could just turn him into a boyfriend. Relationships are two-sided, and he doesn't want to be with you. Why do you want to continue friends with benefits when you know he doesn't want anything except sex yet you are emotionally attached and blieve by "wanting it" you can make him want it too? It doesn't work this way. Accept it and move on. 1
Rainbowlove Posted April 13, 2015 Posted April 13, 2015 yeah i got dumped after 3 years on the anniversary of my father's death by a text message. I'd say my problems trump yours. Then start your own thread. Don't compare your problems to the OP's. OP, it's a crummy way to get dumped - but you got the message loud and clear. Block your former friend and move along. Live and learn is all you can do. 1
Riptide91 Posted April 13, 2015 Posted April 13, 2015 No well he then said he didn't want to hurt me. I am like you could have called or told me to my face. I wanted friendship, he wanted friendship, then out of nowhere he cut me off completely. Do yourself a favor, don't get into these types of "relationships". Find yourself a real man and start something that will blossom into more. He doesn't want a relationship, all he probably wants is the sex. Now you know, live and learn.
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