disneyfan90 Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 When I was in high school, there was a guy who would always hint to my friends that he wanted to date me. All throughout high school, my friends picked up on subtle signs and urged me to go out with him. He would always try to talk to me as well, and I always thought he was a very nice person. The problem was that I was very shy in high school, and so I wasn't actually interested in dating anybody. The thought scared me like none other, and I also just wanted to focus on school and other things. He and I ended up going to different colleges, so I didn't really keep in touch with him. We're both in grad school now and living in different states, about 700 miles apart. I saw him again a year ago at an event that a mutual friend had set up, and I was totally taken aback. He changed so much, and I was amazed at the person he had become. We talked a bit, and I enjoyed talking to him so much that after that, all I could do was daydream about him. Ever since then, I've been wanting to message him on facebook and somehow hint that I was interested in him. I told myself I would do it on a certain day, but I kept procrastinating because I wanted to say the right thing, and I didn't want to come across as weird. Once again, fear stopped me from taking any action. Just two days ago, I learned that he is engaged. Let's just say, I procrastinated a bit too much. Every time I see pictures of him and his fiancé, I wonder what could have been if only I had the courage to message him. Dating doesn't even scare me the way it used to--I've dated several people after high school, so I don't understand why I was so afraid to message him. But now I missed my chance, and it's eating away at me. For the past year, all I did was daydream about a future with him, but now that's no longer a possibility. I feel very numb inside now and all of a sudden have lost my usual energy. It's kind of an extreme feeling I know, especially since I never even dated him. I think it's because I thought he was absolutely perfect in every single way, and I feel it's difficult to find someone like that. But I've certainly learned my lesson from this--don't be afraid to take chances. How do you get over something like this? 1
Mrin Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 Well first, there isn't anything to get over. Except maybe a fantasy. But you hit the nail on the head: don't be afraid to take chances. No dying man ever says, "I really wish I lived a more reserved life". Go for it. I'll share a coulda been with you. Many many years ago during my undergrad years there was this blonde bombshell. She was extremely smart and never traveled in the same circles as me - I was a frat rat and student politician. I had a lot of classes with her and we always had this electric chemistry. But I always saw her as prude so never did anything about it. At the end of the four years of college - during my last week - I was at a rowdy bar and she walked over and sat in my lap. Sparks were flying and this was the type of girl I could really fall for given her intelligence. This was a done deal and who knows where it was going to lead. All I needed to do was stand up and walk to the veranda with her. And keep my mouth shut. Unfortunately I did not do that. I sorta might have possibly maybe called a Marine a jarhead on the way out. Ya. Don't do that. Ever. Never saw her again. 2
PinkElephants Posted April 12, 2015 Posted April 12, 2015 How do you get over something like this? By realizing that he was totally capable of messaging you too but he didn't. If he wanted to be with you, he would have asked you but he asked someone else. Don't beat yourself up over it but don't be afraid to take chances next time! Amazing things can happen
Recommended Posts