Felicia Jones Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 So ive been dating this guy for a month and we really liked eachother. He was very loving and refering to me as his girlfriend. A few days ago we had a fight over text. It started with me saying i didnt like him spanking me on the ass. It then escalated to me accusing him of being macho and him saying i have problems with feminism and was too masculine. He said he was looking for a girl not a man. Then i told him to go look for another girl then, and he just responded ok. An hour later he explained that he didnt mean to be disrespectful but that he was very offended to be called macho. I fell asleep so i wanted a day to respond. Then i responded that i was sorry, but that he couldnt expect me to know how he was thinking. After that nothing, for three days just silence. I sent one message a day ago asking if he was just gonna ignore me, and he didnt even read it. Are we over??
ExpatInItaly Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 So ive been dating this guy for a month and we really liked eachother. He was very loving and refering to me as his girlfriend. A few days ago we had a fight over text. It started with me saying i didnt like him spanking me on the ass. It then escalated to me accusing him of being macho and him saying i have problems with feminism and was too masculine. He said he was looking for a girl not a man. Then i told him to go look for another girl then, and he just responded ok. An hour later he explained that he didnt mean to be disrespectful but that he was very offended to be called macho. I fell asleep so i wanted a day to respond. Then i responded that i was sorry, but that he couldnt expect me to know how he was thinking. After that nothing, for three days just silence. I sent one message a day ago asking if he was just gonna ignore me, and he didnt even read it. Are we over?? I'd say it's probably done, yes. He responded to a perceived insult by insulting you. Do you really want to be with someone like that? Also, in the future, avoid arguing over text. As you have seen, things often get taken too far and then you're left hanging. 1
goldway90 Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 This after one month!! i guess it's time to cut your losses. 2
Author Felicia Jones Posted April 11, 2015 Author Posted April 11, 2015 I'd say it's probably done, yes. He responded to a perceived insult by insulting you. Do you really want to be with someone like that? Also, in the future, avoid arguing over text. As you have seen, things often get taken too far and then you're left hanging. Thank you for the reply! I really would want us to get back together though, even if i know i propably should dump him. Or actually i just want to have a talk face to face about this. Regardless if we are going to break up or not. Could i send him a text asking to meet and talk about it or will that just make me seem clingy since he clearly is ignoring me? Because im pretty sure hes not gonna take the first step, hes too proud for that. Or should i wait a few days?
Art_Critic Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 you broke it off by telling him to go find another girl, you should stick to your first assessment and not go back on it, next.......... 2
Poppyolive Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 Thank you for the reply! I really would want us to get back together though, even if i know i propably should dump him. Or actually i just want to have a talk face to face about this. Regardless if we are going to break up or not. Could i send him a text asking to meet and talk about it or will that just make me seem clingy since he clearly is ignoring me? Because im pretty sure hes not gonna take the first step, hes too proud for that. Or should i wait a few days? No. Do not contact him. You told him go find another girl. So, let him. You'll just seem clingy & Cray Cray if you bug him with more texts. 1
HurtGator Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 you broke it off by telling him to go find another girl, you should stick to your first assessment and not go back on it, next.......... I was going to say the same thing. Why would you say "go find someone else" without intending to break up with them? Sounds very manipulative. 2
ZiggyZoo Posted April 11, 2015 Posted April 11, 2015 This seems like too much hassle, and only after one month? Keep walking, he's not the one for you. Someone who's going to let pride get in the way of maintaining a relationship isn't worth your time anyway. 1
hollypolly Posted April 12, 2015 Posted April 12, 2015 I think we have all said things we didnt mean in the heat of the moment so dont beat yourself up. I dont agree that it was manipulative. Im sure you were just hurting and didnt expect that response. The bottom line is that if he really wanted to be with you and you were right for each other then you would have gotten past such a small fight. Pick yourself up and stop beating yourself up. Sadly this guy wasnt for you. Take some time to heal and when the time is right you will meet someone worth your time. His not replying to you gives him control over the situation as hes left you hanging. It hurts like hell i know but take this time to decide what you want out of a relationship and in time youll see that this wasnt right. If he contacts you, id personally ignore it. Best of luck to you
Author Felicia Jones Posted April 12, 2015 Author Posted April 12, 2015 I think we have all said things we didnt mean in the heat of the moment so dont beat yourself up. I dont agree that it was manipulative. Im sure you were just hurting and didnt expect that response. The bottom line is that if he really wanted to be with you and you were right for each other then you would have gotten past such a small fight. Pick yourself up and stop beating yourself up. Sadly this guy wasnt for you. Take some time to heal and when the time is right you will meet someone worth your time. His not replying to you gives him control over the situation as hes left you hanging. It hurts like hell i know but take this time to decide what you want out of a relationship and in time youll see that this wasnt right. If he contacts you, id personally ignore it. Best of luck to you Thank you so so much, this was really comforting to read. You describe exactly how i feel, im grateful you took time to write it.
anna121 Posted April 12, 2015 Posted April 12, 2015 I'd also let things be. I'd also definitely steer clear of having discussions like this by text! 1
todreaminblue Posted April 12, 2015 Posted April 12, 2015 i agree that this sort of convo would have been better held face to face....you now know for next time....best wishes...deb
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