Ami1uwant Posted April 9, 2015 Posted April 9, 2015 Some background on me..... I'm in my 40s, single male. I haven't posted here in a while. Beginning of the year I moved yo start a new job after. My Last relationship of 3.5yrs ended last summer. I only recently started getting my feet wet in the dating pool. This happened last week. With my new job I have gotten involved in various committees on things and meeting new people. I usually don't look at work as a place to date. The place I work at is a large hospital and I work in An administrative role ( not in any sort of senior level, or management). Throughout my professional career my dating rules are that I font date people in my immediate working group or groups I'd regularly work with on projects. Anyone else is fair game to date. I've never really tried to date people I worked with. One committee I was on meets once a month. Last Wednesday was the third meeting I have been to.. Each meeting has been a regular group of people and a few others that come to one but not the others. After Wednesday meeting I got to talking to someone who I didn't know before. I was just talking to her not with any ulterior motives. We get to talking....about work but a few other things. As this hoes on it hits me... I get this knot in my stomach. Did we really connect/hit it off? How do you measure things like instant chemistry? It's never happened to me before. The closest thing I could describe this feel is that it was a similar feeling to what I had gotten when you were wondering if you should approach a woman and ask her out or it was someone you got to know, like a classmate in college, and you wanted to date. I got similar feelings after a 1st date where you think it went well but you were just not sure. So we worked in the same area so we walked and talked a bit before parting ways. This was in the morning. And we sent a few back and forth emails that were mostly work related. She was working on something that I could help her on. We set up a meeting on Friday. We met on Friday and thinks seemed to click again. We talked about work and dome other stuff for about an hour. She had another meeting yo home yo which ended it. In my professional career I've never had this happen before. Does she feel the same? I can't tell. It's hard for me to read some signs of this. I have no problem being friends with women. I have long standing female friends. Relationships like this took a lot longer to develop over years. The conversations we had felt like we had been talking to each other for years. Even in people I have dated it wasn't like this in terms of the conversation yo start off. I look at this ad a random meeting. Even though she works still the same place I do, other than this committee our paths would not cross. Part of me is thinking should I ask her out...if so how to do it in the right way.and when you do? The way my brother met his wife.....she happen to date one of the guys when he was away at college so she knew the guys but my brother didn't meet her. On introductions he just her it was this guys old girlfriend so the name he said was a known gloomy so she hit him. Later that night she came over yo apologize and then had a conversation and hit it off. If I met her elsewhere I would have asked her out on a date, but because we work at the sane place it complicates things. I'm looking for advice here on how to measure her interest and how yo approach this. I have my own theory on relationships. There is a window of opportunity. If nothing is acted on in could be lost for good. Ie you wait yo long you could be friend zoned.
Gaeta Posted April 9, 2015 Posted April 9, 2015 If I were you I would invite her to grab lunch with you, first. That would be a way to spend time together outside of work and see how that feels, and a good way to fish for information. For all you know this woman may be in a relationship.
Author Ami1uwant Posted April 9, 2015 Author Posted April 9, 2015 I know she could be in a relationship...I don't see a ring on any finger. I have thought about asking her about getting together over lunch.
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