Is it normal that I only want one woman, and don't want to be a pimp?

[JoshCube]

It seems like most men out there are players, and would do anything to have multiple women by their side. For some reason, I just don't seem to be one of those guys, and I've always wanted to be with just one woman since I was very young. I seem to be very sensitive, and want to share my emotions. My hobby till this very day is playing RPGs that have a guy meets girl storyline, and then crying at the end based on the outcome.

 

The reason why I feel I don't want multiple women is because my emotions have felt tangled being with more than one, and I just don't like the feeling, because it just doesn't feel right. When I'm out partying with one girl, I have a guilty conscience with the other girl that's staring into the fire place by herself at night. I have some sort of sensitivity to seeing women get neglected, hurt, and cheated on, which is why I cannot bring myself to do this.

 

Are there any men out there that feel the same way as me? Most men I've spoken to said they couldn't understand me at all.

[Gary S]

There's nothing wrong with that, that's the way it's supposed to be. The guys who want more than one women have a false sense of reality and are immature.

[Mrin]

Totally nothing wrong with that. I am fortunate enough to have few problems meeting women and dating. I have dated many women and at times many women at once. But when I meet a woman that captivates me - forget about it. No interest in having any other woman in my life romantically. Done. End of story.

[Wombat88]

Yes. It's perfectly normal. I daresay the type of woman you probably want will see it as a good trait, not a bad one.

[blackcat777]

I still cry at the end of Vagrant Story.

 

Make sure you find a woman with the same values, is all.

 

It's not inherently weird to want monogamy, lots of guys want it. But men also crave variety... so a couple that feels comfortable in expressing all the different parts of themselves, the full spectrum of emotions felt and animal tendencies... are more likely to feel fulfilled with one person, because that singular person brings such a diverse energy to the table.

 

I think some guys who feel terrified at the thought of monogamy simply haven't met a woman diverse enough to inspire that feeling from them. I know some guys who go to strip clubs because they believe they'll never have down and dirty wild sex with their girlfriends.

[Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646]

There's a difference between being a pimp and keeping your options open in case some woman who doesn't want to commit flakes

[EgoJoe]

Nope nothing wrong. Just remember no matter what she says you're not responsible for her feelings.

[ZA Dater]

It seems like most men out there are players, and would do anything to have multiple women by their side. For some reason, I just don't seem to be one of those guys, and I've always wanted to be with just one woman since I was very young. I seem to be very sensitive, and want to share my emotions. My hobby till this very day is playing RPGs that have a guy meets girl storyline, and then crying at the end based on the outcome.

 

The reason why I feel I don't want multiple women is because my emotions have felt tangled being with more than one, and I just don't like the feeling, because it just doesn't feel right. When I'm out partying with one girl, I have a guilty conscience with the other girl that's staring into the fire place by herself at night. I have some sort of sensitivity to seeing women get neglected, hurt, and cheated on, which is why I cannot bring myself to do this.

 

Are there any men out there that feel the same way as me? Most men I've spoken to said they couldn't understand me at all.

 

Nothing wrong with that but I suppose there is the risk of being labelled a "good guy" which has positive and negative connotations.

 

I always say, never do anything to anyone which will cause you to loose sleep at night.

[Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646]

Nothing wrong with that but I suppose there is the risk of being labelled a "good guy" which has positive and negative connotations.

 

I always say, never do anything to anyone which will cause you to loose sleep at night.

 

Well I'm pretty remorseless so I'll douche it up!

 

 

 

...kidding

[gaius]

The romance storyline with Ashley always got me in Mass Effect. I didn't sleep with anyone else in the second game even after I found out she was unavailable, and it filled me with joy when she showed up in the beginning of the third. But connections and love like that doesn't happen in real life anymore. =/ So even when a thing like that might be your ideal you eventually kind of learn to shift into a more practical way of doing things.

 

In other words, it's normal if you're young and you don't have a ton of experience.

[ZA Dater]

Well I'm pretty remorseless so I'll douche it up!

 

 

 

...kidding

 

Sometimes wish I cared considerably less, would make a lot of things much simpler.

 

Though they sometimes say the chase is better than the reward...

[fitnessfan365]

I'm a big believer in dating multiple women. It allows you to remain indifferent and prevents needy behavior. It also allows you to be more selective and subjective. Let's say that you're only dating one woman. You're more likely to overlook red flags or be more tolerant because she is your only option. But if she was one of three or four, you'd drop her without thinking twice. Remaining impartial makes your final decision ultimately the best one. My GF started out as one of four, and after a month, I knew she was the right one.

 

But I want to stress that I fully believe in monogamy. So I only have sex with the woman I decide to focus on. Unlike some guys who are hooking up with every woman they're dating. Don't get me wrong. It is tempting when multiple women are pushing for sex. However, I have strong will power.

[Revolver]

Being a "pimp" is hard

[Strength in Healing]

Haha revolver. "It's hard out here for a pimp" money for rent etc.

 

 

Anyways, I'm with fitness. To the topic creator, I think it's a very bad mentality. I was like you when I wad 19/20 but quickly realized youre far more likely to get burnt/ignore important red flags by focusing on one, and there's no payoff for it either. Date many, choose one, be loyal to the one who earned it.

 

 

Period.

[SmartDude]

There are benifits and weaknesses to both methods.

Dating more that one at a time as opposed to focusing on just one person...

 

If you are able to date multiple women its easy to be fooled.

You don't know how you feel for just one woman because you are influenced by all the others. Not risking getting hurt is just shutting off your emotions. There is a good chance that this emotional shallowness will not allow you to see something hidden within some one else. A true gem, rather than fools gold.

 

Dating just one woman at a time can also have its problems. Unless you have something else to fill up your time and your interests, You may focus too much on the woman. This focused attention all of a sudden may become to much for her. She may try to put you in the friendzone simply because she has been hurt before, but still is attracted to you. And then this ussualy does not work out either. Once a man has been told that he is "just a friend", that esentially ends the hunt, and the hunter must move on to greener pastures.

[loveweary11]

It seems like most men out there are players, and would do anything to have multiple women by their side. For some reason, I just don't seem to be one of those guys, and I've always wanted to be with just one woman since I was very young. I seem to be very sensitive, and want to share my emotions. My hobby till this very day is playing RPGs that have a guy meets girl storyline, and then crying at the end based on the outcome.

 

The reason why I feel I don't want multiple women is because my emotions have felt tangled being with more than one, and I just don't like the feeling, because it just doesn't feel right. When I'm out partying with one girl, I have a guilty conscience with the other girl that's staring into the fire place by herself at night. I have some sort of sensitivity to seeing women get neglected, hurt, and cheated on, which is why I cannot bring myself to do this.

 

Are there any men out there that feel the same way as me? Most men I've spoken to said they couldn't understand me at all.

 

 

I feel exactly the same way, but most women, in my experience, like to date lots of people at once... so I just go with the flow and do the same.

 

It confuses the hell out of my emotions too..to the point I don't care about any of them.

 

Welcome to modern society. Kind of sucks.

[Diana.dellala]

There are both girls and guys who prefer polygamy. Although many more prefer monogamy.

 

There are those ones who prefer having a choice, being indifferent, not getting attached because it's easier not to get hurt. Some of them don't want to admit that... I guess that's something that makes it easier to deal with relationships for them. The problem is that their relationships are much less intense, interesting and satisfying. Sometimes it's because of their own attitude that the girl never gets to really trust them and doesn't show him her best qualities. But if they're ok with that, that's fine.

 

Maybe because some of them accepted some red flags while they should have said no; maybe it happened more than once; hence, they lost the girls' respect and love eventually. Maybe because they don't know that there are better ways to communicate what they really want and expect and get her to fall in love and behave without losing interest. Maybe they selected a girl that didn't deserve them. Maybe there's something else beneath it.

 

But as I said, if they're ok with that, that's fine.

 

There's nothing wrong with polygamy.

 

But there's a big differences between polygamy, being able to care for and love more women at once and trying not to get too involved and get hurt again. And there's a big difference between dating women who want polygamy as well/want to share their man and cheating while knowing that thegirls monogamous and would get hurt

 

There's nothing wrong with monogamy either, just choose the right girl that deserves you and don't accept behaviors you don't like from her.

[katiegrl]

Josh, responding to the title of this thread, there is no such thing as *normal* when it comes to dating and your preferences.

 

Some people, like you, and me, and MANY others, prefer to date "one at a time."

 

Others prefer juggling many until the *right* one emerges from the crowd.

 

How you choose to date is your own personal choice. There is no right or wrong. Just do whatever YOU are comfortable with, and whatever works for YOU.

[MidwestUSA]

Josh, a one woman man who is married does not advertise on Yahoo for another (your princess Zelda lookalike), and carry on an EA.

 

If you're with the wrong woman, you divorce her before stepping out.

 

Actions, not words.

[Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646]

Dating multiple people at once works the best since you won't waste as much time getting into a relationship with someone you like. Much more efficient.

 

If you concurrently date 3 people over 1-2 months, and settle on one person, that took a couple months whereas otherwise if you didn't get lucky until the 3rd person, could take anywhere from 3-6 months!

[pteromom]

Dating one woman is fine - IF you stick to your values, move slowly, and make sure you choose someone who shares your values and goals and integrity.

 

Dating one woman is stupid if you fall head over heels for the first woman who winks at you, and keep scrambling to try to make her love you the way you want to be loved, when that isn't who she is.

 

So if you are willing to put in the work to find a woman who is your match, there is nothing wrong with it.

[BlackOpsZombieGirl]

Josh, a one woman man who is married does not advertise on Yahoo for another (your princess Zelda lookalike), and carry on an EA.

 

If you're with the wrong woman, you divorce her before stepping out.

 

Actions, not words.

 

I was literally JUST about to post something similar to this, but you've already done so.

 

Yes, I've read his other thread regarding his wife "cheating" on him....some of the inappropriate (and disgusting) things he has posted on there were alarming and showed what kind of man he is (or at least what kind of man he wants us to believe he is).

 

He should definitely get DIVORCED *first* BEFORE even thinking about dating and being a supposed "one woman man".

 

 

.

[JoshCube]

Josh, a one woman man who is married does not advertise on Yahoo for another (your princess Zelda lookalike), and carry on an EA.

 

If you're with the wrong woman, you divorce her before stepping out.

 

Actions, not words.

 

In my subconscious mind, I was not happy with my wife. A husband that is unhappy with his wife is at higher risk to slip away.

[JoshCube]

I was literally JUST about to post something similar to this, but you've already done so.

 

Yes, I've read his other thread regarding his wife "cheating" on him....some of the inappropriate (and disgusting) things he has posted on there were alarming and showed what kind of man he is (or at least what kind of man he wants us to believe he is).

 

He should definitely get DIVORCED *first* BEFORE even thinking about dating and being a supposed "one woman man".

 

 

.

 

She slept with the guy. That's 10x worse than me being in an emotional affair. By the way, Old Testament/Torah does not recognize an emotional affair as adultery, and neither do the U.S. courts.

[preraph]

Good for you. Just means you have a little something between the ears and that it's not overruled by what's between the legs. The good news is that this is the formula most women are looking for, so you will end up with a good woman while your pimps are busy breaking hearts and accruing child support payments.