maverick84 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 First post so hi everyone. I goto my gym almost every day and there's a girl I like the look of - she works there so she's there almost everyday as well. I think I might have a chance with her but no real idea if she's taken or interested or whatever. I haven't talked to her yet. How do I talk to her? I was thinking the direct approach i.e. 'Hi, what's your name... I've seen you and think you look good... I'm (my name)' etc etc The only thing is that if it turns awkward then I'll have to see her everyday as I go to the gym, which would be annoying. Any ideas?
SycamoreCircle Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 I think it's a little tricky because she works there. She is required to uphold some level of professionalism. Asking her out on her shift may put her in an awkward position. If she is a Personal Trainer, forget it. Those people are off limits. No way they'll jeopardize their professional reputation by fooling around with men at the gym. The German word Nestbeschmutzer comes to mind---don't sh;t where you eat. My advice, and others may disagree with me, is to pull a bit of a stalker-ish move. Start to be friendly to her at the gym. Introduce yourself. Get a feel. After a few weeks, coordinate bumping into her outside of the workplace. Maybe just as she is coming out of the gym---on the corner, or something. Ask her out OUTSIDE of the gym "Fancy seeing you...how are you?" Just talk to her. If she seems inconvenienced by your chatter, do not ask her out. If she seems keyed in, ask her out. Keep it light and casual.
fitnessfan365 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 (edited) The one pick up rule I have is to never hit on a woman where she works. The last thing a woman wants is to be put on the spot in front of her co-workers. Plus, a woman in customer service is paid to be nice. So you have to put in a bit more time to flirt and bring her out of her customer service shell over time. Personally, I just don't have the patience for it. But if you're determined to ask the woman out, this is how I'd go about it : 1) When you come in, flirt with her just a little bit. Get her laughing and more receptive/relaxed around you and call her by her first name. But DON'T talk to her every day. Space it out and talk to her every few days for like 3-5 mins tops. Now if after 1-2 weeks of these brief interactions, she's also remembering your first name and she seems genuinely receptive, you might have a shot. 2) But as I said before, you don't want to ask her out when she's parked behind the desk in front of other co-workers. So if possible, approach her and make your move when she's out on the gym floor. Or if you're there every day, try to watch and see when she leaves for the day. Then one day you can simply walk out after her, and make your move then. But as I said, I don't have the patience for all that crap. I'd rather just approach women in public on the street, at the grocery store, at workout spots I go to outdoors, etc.. Edited April 6, 2015 by fitnessfan365
Author maverick84 Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 The one pick up rule I have is to never hit on a woman where she works. The last thing a woman wants is to be put on the spot in front of her co-workers. Plus, a woman in customer service is paid to be nice. It's a large enough gym that if I talk to her it'll probably be out of earshot of any co-workers... Yes she's paid to be nice but that doesn't mean she can't stay friendly, wrap the convo and walk off if not interested... The only risk is if/when I ask her out - then it's either a yes or no and can be dodgy... but whatever I haven't even talked to her once to gage any interest at the moment.
fitnessfan365 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 It's a large enough gym that if I talk to her it'll probably be out of earshot of any co-workers... Yes she's paid to be nice but that doesn't mean she can't stay friendly, wrap the convo and walk off if not interested... The only risk is if/when I ask her out - then it's either a yes or no and can be dodgy... but whatever I haven't even talked to her once to gage any interest at the moment. I'm a freelance personal trainer now running my own business. But back when I was training out of a variety of gyms, there were always multiple people behind the front desk at any given time to prevent lines forming and back up. Since you mentioned her being a front desk employee, that's why I'd imagine she'd have at least 1-2 other people behind the desk with her. Especially if it's a larger gym with more traffic.
Author maverick84 Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 I think it's a little tricky because she works there. She is required to uphold some level of professionalism. Asking her out on her shift may put her in an awkward position. If she is a Personal Trainer, forget it. Those people are off limits. No way they'll jeopardize their professional reputation by fooling around with men at the gym. The German word Nestbeschmutzer comes to mind---don't sh;t where you eat. I think all the people who work there offer some sort of training or tuition to certain members.... not sure if that's the reason they are there since most of the time they are walking around cleaning **** up. I don't necessarily agree with not hitting on people at their work. If their not busy just expressing some interest and seeing her reaction wouldn't be the end of the world. I dunno, it's an interesting challenge but hopefully not putting too much pressure on myself... Also I'm planning on moving at some point in the coming weeks so I'm not gonna be at that gym forever.
Author maverick84 Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 I'm a freelance personal trainer now running my own business. But back when I was training out of a variety of gyms, there were always multiple people behind the front desk at any given time to prevent lines forming and back up. Since you mentioned her being a front desk employee, that's why I'd imagine she'd have at least 1-2 other people behind the desk with her. Especially if it's a larger gym with more traffic. No, she's never behind a desk. She's always either walking around alone, cleaning **** up or behind the scenes somewhere.
fitnessfan365 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Also I'm planning on moving at some point in the coming weeks so I'm not gonna be at that gym forever. That's your opening. Until you move, try to engage her in a few mins of flirty fun convo every few days and get on a first name basis. Then when you're leaving you let her know that the only thing you'll miss about the gym is her, and that you'd like to see her sometime outside the gym. Number exchange, date plans, and done. Since you're leaving the gym, it will make more of an impact on her. Especially if you've built up a little rapport and get on a first name basis. You just need to have a bit of patience.
Guitarisgood Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Guy: Hey can you help me with my bench press, I keep struggling Girl: And why's that Guy: because I have a 'pressing' matter to ask you out on a date
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