mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 I've been seeing this guy 6months hes 25 me 21 both live with parents. We've met up a few times we've had sex but lost his hard the last couple of times he was embarrassed last time phoned me a taxi paid & kissed bye he said "I love you" I asked him during the week if he was up for bowling this weekend or next weeked. "hiya how are you in work most the week til about 11 hopefully next weekend xx" then although rampant sex can't be ruled out. I said " Haha sex after work this weekend?bowling this week? He said "Yeah hopefully we can get sometime" we were flirting then suggestively. Saturday night I text "are you ready to pounce tonight rawr! with emojis he replied hahaha could be a bit late ahhhh xx :'):'):') *thumbs up* then I said haha don't be toooo late *cat* you in work? x he said haha ill try very excited :'):'):") xx ye in late depends time I get out at I said "haha yeah you should be rawr (;:')*cat* x I sent a snap to him at work in my bra. He was tired after work and. he went straight to sleep. I text him "shall we save pouncing for tomorrow night? x" He didn't say anything back then at like 3.30am U coming over? f*k it we have sex Me: hmm maybe take a while to get ready like half hour Him: no now or never Me: can't sleep anyway ha yeah I'll come be like 15mins Him: u can't sleepover though Me: we'll leave it for tonight then next week we can meet sooner x Him : Ahh I'm freaked Him: love to bang you now Him: we're finished Me: aw next weekend we'll get freaky for sure I'll come if I can stay over now I'll leave early Him: nah we're finished He went to sleep then Me: it's late to be meeting 4am .We'll go harder next week to make up for this week night x He's never acted that way towards me ever. We were sort of seeing each other exclusively not meeting up with others. I'm not sure if he felt teased since I was quite flirty with him then annoyed when it couldn't happen. It was just very strange we've never met at 4am either. He could've been drinking thats the only time he'd text at a crazy hour like that which isn't all the time. Did I lead him on tease him too much?
Diezel Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 I don't buy that he was working and "fell asleep". If I have the promise of sex waiting in the wings after work, you best believe that I am doing my best to go home and get ready for that... and THEN sleep after. And to come over at 3:30 and then you had to leave? In my days, we used to call those "booty calls". 3
kendahke Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Yeah that is a booty call. I see no where that you teased him or lead him on. I'd be put off by any guy wanting me to come out of my house at 3:30am to eff him and then get back up an hour later and go home. No. Pay a hooker if you need it that badly at that hour. 5
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 I don't buy that he was working and "fell asleep". If I have the promise of sex waiting in the wings after work, you best believe that I am doing my best to go home and get ready for that... and THEN sleep after. And to come over at 3:30 and then you had to leave? In my days, we used to call those "booty calls". He works at the airport weird hours was on the night shift. Usually I stay over his house but his parents would've been around the next day as it was bank holiday no work. He just acted weird last night not they way he usually is. I don't know if he went out afterwards last night . I've never agreed to meeting up at early hours. We were supposed to be going out next weekend bowling together.
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 Yeah that is a booty call. I see no where that you teased him or lead him on. I'd be put off by any guy wanting me to come out of my house at 3:30am to eff him and then get back up an hour later and go home. No. Pay a hooker if you need it that badly at that hour. He's never booty called me like that before he's text drunk usually I love yous or something. I was very annoyed at him last night thats exactly why I never went over . We're seeing each other we aren't meeting up with other people . I don't if he was just drunk his behaviour was terrible an how he spoke to me. He has agreed to go out and stuff. Do I speak to him about it? or just give him space?
almond Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 He told you that if you don't get to his house without notice at 3am, fk him, then leave, that it's over. Why would you want to be with someone that treats you like absolute dirt? Do not accept this treatment. He has ended it. Let it be. 8
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Yeah even if he likes you he isn't going to want to come over at 4am esp if he can't crash. I'd only do that **** if I was desperate. The whole thing seems stupid, getting angry over a booty call.
elaine567 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 I am wondering if this "losing his hard", has something to do with how he is acting. 1
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 He told you that if you don't get to his house without notice at 3am, fk him, then leave, that it's over. Why would you want to be with someone that treats you like absolute dirt? Do not accept this treatment. He has ended it. Let it be. He's not normally like this just need to talk to him about it straighten him up. He acted like a child throwing a tantrum. He isn't normally aggressive.
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 Yeah even if he likes you he isn't going to want to come over at 4am esp if he can't crash. I'd only do that **** if I was desperate. The whole thing seems stupid, getting angry over a booty call. It was strange I don't know but the "we're finished" part was odd would mean he saw us to be in a relationship of some sort. He wasn't meeting up with others for sure.After time I'm sure he'll see how ridiculous it was the 4am. Actually once he did send a message late a long while asking if I was coming over it was after his friends birthday party he wanted to try and meet we were both busy the rest of the weekend. Ended up being late I never went over and after he text how I let him down . He didn't text that late since that time so I'm not sure if he's just aggressive drunk.
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 I am wondering if this "losing his hard", has something to do with how he is acting. Oh would the losing his hard be affecting him? we'd be drinking the drink could've be affecting it.
almond Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Do you really think you can "straighten him out?" If so, I'm afraid you're in for a rude awakening. This guy demanded you come over for sex at a ridiculous hour, then leave once he is done with you. You asked for 30 mins to get ready, and he tells you that if you don't leave now, it's over. You then offer sex another night and he tells you that it's over. You pretty much beg him to let you make it up to him, again offering sex, and he still tells you it's over if you don't get to him now. You aren't going to fix someone like this, and if you can't see that this is not the sort of treatment that you should put up with, I really think you need to focus on fixing yourself <3 This guy is trying to threaten and manipulate you into delivering sex and then getting out, all in the middle of the night and with no notice. Run for the hills...this sort of thing will only get worse. Find someone that treats you with some respect, and realise that you deserve much, much better than this crap. 4
elaine567 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Oh would the losing his hard be affecting him? we'd be drinking the drink could've be affecting it. If he'd been drinking a lot, losing his erection is normal, but I was thinking if he does think he has a problem, then at 3:30am he maybe was hard and needed to "test it out" with you and was frustrated that you said no. OR he thinks you are avoiding sex with him because last two times he couldn't keep it up, so he is finishing with you before you finish with him. Or it was just a booty call and he is fed up of the relationship and you refusing to come over was the last straw. Whatever it is, he has no right to disrespect you. Calling you to come over at 3:30am for a quick sex session and expecting you to leave straight after, and speaking nastily to you is not respecting you; that is treating you like a hooker. But, at least hookers get paid... He needs to learn that is not what you expect of him, have a long talk, or failing that then I suggest you leave him. 1
Redhead14 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 I've been seeing this guy 6months hes 25 me 21 both live with parents. We've met up a few times we've had sex but lost his hard the last couple of times he was embarrassed last time phoned me a taxi paid & kissed bye he said "I love you" I asked him during the week if he was up for bowling this weekend or next weeked. "hiya how are you in work most the week til about 11 hopefully next weekend xx" then although rampant sex can't be ruled out. I said " Haha sex after work this weekend?bowling this week? He said "Yeah hopefully we can get sometime" we were flirting then suggestively. Saturday night I text "are you ready to pounce tonight rawr! with emojis he replied hahaha could be a bit late ahhhh xx :'):'):') *thumbs up* then I said haha don't be toooo late *cat* you in work? x he said haha ill try very excited :'):'):") xx ye in late depends time I get out at I said "haha yeah you should be rawr (;:')*cat* x I sent a snap to him at work in my bra. He was tired after work and. he went straight to sleep. I text him "shall we save pouncing for tomorrow night? x" He didn't say anything back then at like 3.30am U coming over? f*k it we have sex Me: hmm maybe take a while to get ready like half hour Him: no now or never Me: can't sleep anyway ha yeah I'll come be like 15mins Him: u can't sleepover though Me: we'll leave it for tonight then next week we can meet sooner x Him : Ahh I'm freaked Him: love to bang you now Him: we're finished Me: aw next weekend we'll get freaky for sure I'll come if I can stay over now I'll leave early Him: nah we're finished He went to sleep then Me: it's late to be meeting 4am .We'll go harder next week to make up for this week night x He's never acted that way towards me ever. We were sort of seeing each other exclusively not meeting up with others. I'm not sure if he felt teased since I was quite flirty with him then annoyed when it couldn't happen. It was just very strange we've never met at 4am either. He could've been drinking thats the only time he'd text at a crazy hour like that which isn't all the time. Did I lead him on tease him too much? "We were sort of seeing each other exclusively" Either you are or you aren't exclusive. Did you two ever have a conversation about what you wanted for yourselves out of your dating experiences? Was he looking for casual relationship? Do you want a long term relationship for yourself? If you want to "straighten him up", don't accommodate that behavior even once. This has been a 6 month string of ONS's basically.
Redhead14 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 I've been seeing this guy 6months hes 25 me 21 both live with parents. We've met up a few times we've had sex but lost his hard the last couple of times he was embarrassed last time phoned me a taxi paid & kissed bye he said "I love you" I asked him during the week if he was up for bowling this weekend or next weeked. "hiya how are you in work most the week til about 11 hopefully next weekend xx" then although rampant sex can't be ruled out. I said " Haha sex after work this weekend?bowling this week? He said "Yeah hopefully we can get sometime" we were flirting then suggestively. Saturday night I text "are you ready to pounce tonight rawr! with emojis he replied hahaha could be a bit late ahhhh xx :'):'):') *thumbs up* then I said haha don't be toooo late *cat* you in work? x he said haha ill try very excited :'):'):") xx ye in late depends time I get out at I said "haha yeah you should be rawr (;:')*cat* x I sent a snap to him at work in my bra. He was tired after work and. he went straight to sleep. I text him "shall we save pouncing for tomorrow night? x" He didn't say anything back then at like 3.30am U coming over? f*k it we have sex Me: hmm maybe take a while to get ready like half hour Him: no now or never Me: can't sleep anyway ha yeah I'll come be like 15mins Him: u can't sleepover though Me: we'll leave it for tonight then next week we can meet sooner x Him : Ahh I'm freaked Him: love to bang you now Him: we're finished Me: aw next weekend we'll get freaky for sure I'll come if I can stay over now I'll leave early Him: nah we're finished He went to sleep then Me: it's late to be meeting 4am .We'll go harder next week to make up for this week night x He's never acted that way towards me ever. We were sort of seeing each other exclusively not meeting up with others. I'm not sure if he felt teased since I was quite flirty with him then annoyed when it couldn't happen. It was just very strange we've never met at 4am either. He could've been drinking thats the only time he'd text at a crazy hour like that which isn't all the time. Did I lead him on tease him too much? It doesn't matter why he got angry . . . he had no right to be angry with you. Even if he was drinking and even if you teased him. The fact that he got angry, says a lot . . . "We were sort of seeing each other exclusively" Either you are or you aren't exclusive. Did you two ever have a conversation about what you wanted for yourselves out of your dating experiences? Was he looking for casual relationship? Do you want a long term relationship for yourself? If you want to "straighten him up", don't accommodate that behavior even once. This has been a 6 month string of ONS's basically.
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 Do you really think you can "straighten him out?" If so, I'm afraid you're in for a rude awakening. This guy demanded you come over for sex at a ridiculous hour, then leave once he is done with you. You asked for 30 mins to get ready, and he tells you that if you don't leave now, it's over. You then offer sex another night and he tells you that it's over. You pretty much beg him to let you make it up to him, again offering sex, and he still tells you it's over if you don't get to him now. You aren't going to fix someone like this, and if you can't see that this is not the sort of treatment that you should put up with, I really think you need to focus on fixing yourself <3 This guy is trying to threaten and manipulate you into delivering sex and then getting out, all in the middle of the night and with no notice. Run for the hills...this sort of thing will only get worse. Find someone that treats you with some respect, and realise that you deserve much, much better than this crap. We do both live with parents might've been trying to avoid seeing them the next day and they wouldn't be in work since it's a day off. Oh I don't mean straighten him up like that more just let him know he can't speak to me like that. Maybe after cooling down he'll realise he was in the wrong . His anger came from nowhere . We probably do need to communicate more . It's only been the times where he's been very drunk he's acted like this don't know if he's a aggressive drunk. He hasn't drunk in ages and been completely fine with me. He was totally wrong how he spoke to me.
kendahke Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 3 This guy is trying to threaten and manipulate you into delivering sex and then getting out, all in the middle of the night and with no notice. Run for the hills...this sort of thing will only get worse. Find someone that treats you with some respect, and realise that you deserve much, much better than this crap. A man who cares about you would not want you being out in the streets by yourself at that hour to service him like a wh0re, be he drunk or not. He'd come get you if he wanted to be with you that badly.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 The dynamic between the OP and this guy seems to be in the booty call range... I don't think any healthy 6 month relationship would be remotely like this. 1
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 If he'd been drinking a lot, losing his erection is normal, but I was thinking if he does think he has a problem, then at 3:30am he maybe was hard and needed to "test it out" with you and was frustrated that you said no. OR he thinks you are avoiding sex with him because last two times he couldn't keep it up, so he is finishing with you before you finish with him. Or it was just a booty call and he is fed up of the relationship and you refusing to come over was the last straw. Whatever it is, he has no right to disrespect you. Calling you to come over at 3:30am for a quick sex session and expecting you to leave straight after, and speaking nastily to you is not respecting you; that is treating you like a hooker. But, at least hookers get paid... He needs to learn that is not what you expect of him, have a long talk, or failing that then I suggest you leave him. Hmm maybe or just feeling horny or craving me at that time an since I offered the next night he thought he'd be ok texting me. It seems very heat in the moment the whole thing . He seems like he is eager to please and was hoping this weekend would happen. A similar thing happened a few months ago when he has a party he was hoping that weekend we'd meet but it was late again. He then said I let him down. We still met another time. I wonder if the drink causing him to act aggressive or just feeling rejected sexually. Do I text him in a few days? probably need to leave some space now.
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 A man who cares about you would not want you being out in the streets by yourself at that hour to service him like a wh0re, be he drunk or not. He'd come get you if he wanted to be with you that badly. And usually I don't let him come to mine because my parents are right next door more awkward situation to have him over so he knows I'd come to him instead. He just acted crazy.
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 The dynamic between the OP and this guy seems to be in the booty call range... I don't think any healthy 6 month relationship would be remotely like this. We're kind of inbetween relationship and fwb like neither still getting to know each other just more in person . We are supposed to be going out soon. We didn't meet up for sex asap it was slowly . He doesn't seem the most confident sexually either.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 And usually I don't let him come to mine because my parents are right next door more awkward situation to have him over so he knows I'd come to him instead. He just acted crazy. Well if this guy gives off the scumbag vibe that I'm envisioning here, you'd probably have to worry about your Dad snapping this little ****'s dick off. Probably good you don't have him over at your place Sound's like he's 25 going on 15 if he's living with his rents still and acting like this... 1
Author mysteriouschic Posted April 6, 2015 Author Posted April 6, 2015 Well if this guy gives off the scumbag vibe that I'm envisioning here, you'd probably have to worry about your Dad snapping this little ****'s dick off. Probably good you don't have him over at your place Sound's like he's 25 going on 15 if he's living with his rents still and acting like this... He is terrible at planning whenever he plans something always goes wrong. I'm the one who organises it all he can't plan at all . I don't know if it makes a different that he's the youngest in his family. He cares a lot about football mostly. He has said he loved me face to face when not drunk. I was pretty shocked by his tantrum too in his eyes I've probably let him down and he's think I just teased him lead him on or something.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 He is terrible at planning whenever he plans something always goes wrong. I'm the one who organises it all he can't plan at all . I don't know if it makes a different that he's the youngest in his family. He cares a lot about football mostly. He has said he loved me face to face when not drunk. I was pretty shocked by his tantrum too in his eyes I've probably let him down and he's think I just teased him lead him on or something. Oh I'm sure he loves putting his D in your V, but he wouldn't treat you like a booty call that he can jerk around at 4am and get pissed off at if he felt true love for you. Having a dysfunctional FWB relationship =/= Love 1
ExpatInItaly Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 He is terrible at planning whenever he plans something always goes wrong. I'm the one who organises it all he can't plan at all . I don't know if it makes a different that he's the youngest in his family. He cares a lot about football mostly. He has said he loved me face to face when not drunk. I was pretty shocked by his tantrum too in his eyes I've probably let him down and he's think I just teased him lead him on or something. OP, I think you are in denial. This guy doesn't care that much about you or your feelings. Expecting you to come over in the middle of the night, screw him, and then leave is not the makings of a relationship. And if you're doing all the planning, what does that tell you about his level of interest? Unfortunately, I think you are more invested than he is. 1
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