jittersondate Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 went on a date last tuesday had a great time. was scheduled for thursday but she was sick. her family is in from out of state until today. when would be a good time to contact her for another date? how should i word it? should i ask if she wants to go on a date or say something like "what night are you free for dinner?"
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 What has been the extent of your contact since your cancelled date? I noticed in your last thread you said i said "its alright.we can try next week " she said "im sorry :(" she contnued texting me joking around so i take it as a good sign How much contact after that did you have? In general I'd say it's safe to ask her if she's free later this week/weekend and go from there. You could call too I suppose, but it might be coming on a bit strong based on her current interest level, I get this feeling she's keeping some distance. I'll let the jury decide on that one.
Vintage79 Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 I don't know why you're dragging your feet - you should have already asked her out for sometime early this week, after her family leaves...you don't have to wait to ask her out until after her family is gone - just don't try to go out with her when they're in town. As such, you should ask her soon - don't waste any more time - extending time between the first few dates is dating suicide.
Gary S Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Try to make one date a week in the beginning. "What night are you free for dinner", "Let's go to dinner on Tuesday", or "what's your schedule look like" are all fine. Negotiate a date the same way you negotiate a get together with a friend. Women are not aliens. 3
Author jittersondate Posted April 7, 2015 Author Posted April 7, 2015 she said she have to get back to me because work is gonna be busy this week...but sh usesd a smiley face idk
PegNosePete Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 Aka: she doesn't want another date but trying to let you down gently. You could always throw her one last attempt, saying to let you know when she knows her schedule, and knows when she's free. You lose nothing by doing that. But if you don't get a positive response, write her off and move on.
Gary S Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 That means she's not interested. Time to cast out another line and date others.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 she said she have to get back to me because work is gonna be busy this week...but sh usesd a smiley face idk That's a rejection. If she actually IS serious about you, you will hear back from her without any contact from you whatsoever. So just wait, or if you don't hear with her within this week, delete her number. Aka: she doesn't want another date but trying to let you down gently. You could always throw her one last attempt, saying to let you know when she knows her schedule, and knows when she's free. You lose nothing by doing that. But if you don't get a positive response, write her off and move on. Nope, he shouldn't try again, that would just be plain desperate. He should move on.
PegNosePete Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 Nope, he shouldn't try again, that would just be plain desperate. He should move on. He loses nothing by sending 1 text. Except 30 seconds of his time.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 He loses nothing by sending 1 text. Except 30 seconds of his time. Yes he does - the ball is already in her court and he doesn't need to keep pestering her. If she's interested, she'll let him know. She knows the text she sent was vague and noncommittal. If it's meant to be, she will reach out to the OP again. There's no reason he needs to text her twice in a row - that would come off as needy and would hurt him more than it'd help. 1
Gary S Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 (edited) Listen to barcode... he does have something to loose by sending her another text - he'll likely get rejected again. How many times do you have to get burned before you understand the stove is hot? A good woman who actually liked him would have counter-offered with another day. Women who like you want to see you. This one only rejects him and is full of excuses. What's next, the sky is falling?! Edited April 7, 2015 by Gary S 1
PegNosePete Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 There's no reason he needs to text her twice in a row - that would come off as needy and would hurt him more than it'd help. If she doesn't want to date him then what does it matter how he "comes off"? And if she doesn't want to date him again then how can it possibly hurt him? He will go from 0% chance of getting another date, to... 0% chance of getting another date? Nothing lost. The fact is, he loses nothing by trying one last time. If she doesn't want to date him, then she still won't want to date him - nothing is lost. But if she is genuinely busy then she might respond positively. You're right she's most likely not interested and the text will go either unanswered or get another vague noncommittal response, but there's a very small chance that she'll say yes. Whereas if he doesn't try again the chance is 0%. So yes. Very small chance of success. But nothing to lose so why not.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 If she doesn't want to date him then what does it matter how he "comes off"? And if she doesn't want to date him again then how can it possibly hurt him? He will go from 0% chance of getting another date, to... 0% chance of getting another date? Nothing lost. The fact is, he loses nothing by trying one last time. If she doesn't want to date him, then she still won't want to date him - nothing is lost. But if she is genuinely busy then she might respond positively. You're right she's most likely not interested and the text will go either unanswered or get another vague noncommittal response, but there's a very small chance that she'll say yes. Whereas if he doesn't try again the chance is 0%. So yes. Very small chance of success. But nothing to lose so why not. Sometimes by not asking or playing hard to get, Women will notice "Oh wow, he's not messaging me nonstop like a freak asking when i'll be free, maybe I'll drop him a line so he knows I'm still interested". You can't ever come across as needy/desperate, and sometimes the "I'm busy" line they feed you is just one big ****-test. Of course a week later if he doesn't hear from her, she's DEF not interested. At THAT point there is nothing lost asking again, but I still wouldn't do it.
PegNosePete Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 Sometimes by not asking or playing hard to get, Women will notice "Oh wow, he's not messaging me nonstop like a freak asking when i'll be free, maybe I'll drop him a line so he knows I'm still interested". You can't ever come across as needy/desperate, and sometimes the "I'm busy" line they feed you is just one big ****-test. In that case by sending the text you weed out the immature game-players. Win-win.
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