Alphaplus Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 My relationship I spent so much time and effort in is finally over. My Story I'm 19 going on 20, went through High school without getting into a relationship, let a lone anyone I could call a friend. So I'm not the best looking guy on earth and had pretty much nothing but anxiety built onto me. The year I graduated 2013 I took a year off. During that year I was a complete loner, didn't talk to anyone, had no confidence. I decided it was time to go back to school, and I'm glad I did. In one of my classes I then met my first girlfriend. At first we didn't really talk. As the semester went on we started small talking, and small talking led to conversations, that led to walking out together after class. She was the first person to ever take interest in me and it made me feel so much better. Eventually since I was the shy guy, she asked me to meet up after class outside of school. Note this was the first time I actually chilled one on one with a girl. After this day I pretty much asked her to chill, hangout every other day. After two weeks she kind of put me in the position where I had to ask her to be mine. Next thing you know I had my first girlfriend. I had my first kiss. I lost my virginity. I attempted to make my life better and I got a decent job. The Relationship: Since I was with her my anxiety disappeared. My confidence went up. Still can't start a conversation though but it's better. I literally fell in love with her. I found everything about her so beautiful and inspiring and didn't want to let her go. We only went out for 4 months but so much memories were made, we've done a lot. You can't imagine. That's why back in January she dumped me. I was honestly devastated, going into a depressed stage. That breakup didn't last long because we got back together a week later. We were happy, enjoyed each others company until Recently. We had a mutual breakup, she was losing interest in me, said I wasn't her type of guy. Honestly I was hurt but not as hurt as our first breakup. This breakup didn't last long either, we got back together not even a week later. I felt the spark was gone. She didn't want to see me and wouldn't even talk to me after we got back together. I called her one night and she told me she just felt sorry for me and that alone was the only reason we were together. All I had was the title of calling her my girlfriend. From there so much rage and anger built inside me. How is it possible one day you're head over heels for someone and the next day that feeling is completely gone. Broke up again. A week later I tried maintaining simple contact, nothing serious. Simple questions with answers. And today I think all contact with her is finished. She doesn't want to talk or see me, until maybe in the future. I asked if we could keep a physical relationship, she just replied with a LOL No, good-bye. (I'm only a man lol) I just replied with something hurtful which I didn't mean. I'm furious at her because she's back with a previous ex so shortly after our relationship. I know now the reason she left.... Honestly I still see her as someone I could call a friend. But now I realize it's finally time to move on. What do you guys recommend? I honestly still seek a relationship I could be happy in, I don't have friends to get me through this and honestly I got very lucky getting with this girl.
hunk Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 Man relationships at your age (even mine) mean basically nothing. We're at the age of experimenting, dating around, making mistakes and finding what we like and what we don't like. If you wanna stay friends with her, then do it. If you don't want to hear from her again, then cut her off. It's simple bro. She just got bored with the relationship and lost attraction for you, felt more attraction for her ex and is therefore with him because he makes her feel better than you do/did. You were together for 4 months and broke up, what, 4 times? That is ridiculous dude. This was never a proper adult relationship. None of this means you're a bad person in any way whatsoever - it just means you guys didn't work out. There's nothing you really could've done about it. Be happy it happened and be thankful she did all these good things for you personally. Now you can move onto the next 20 girls and improve and grow from each and every one like you did with this girl. I know it's very hard to see yourself moving on from this but it will happen if you make yourself do it. Think of her ex stuffing her while she laughs with him in bed about how you asked if you guys could still have sex, or about her texting him while you guys were together (i 100% guarantee she was). She doesn't care man. You shouldn't either, go have fun and try to laugh about how you've got ~35 years to meet girls.
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