Im gonna post my break up, so maybe I will stop bitching to my friend haha.

[makasouleater69]

Well, it all started like 6 years ago, I was a little wild back then. Anyways I met her on my space, and we hung out. She told me she had a abusive relationship with her daughters father, and i listened and we hung out for awhile. We hung out for like 2 weeks, and through this time she told me she couldn't get pregnant, and of course she did. Anyways, i had her move in, and we tried to make it work but it didst. I also found out later that father was her husband, who shoot him self in the face. I still dont know what happened.

 

We broke up for a little, and she had the child, and we made up and she moved back in. I was still being a drunken fool for a bout a year of this, along with her. She was and still is more of a alcoholic than me. We broke up again, because I caught her cheating on me, with some hill billy farmer. After she moved in with that guy, she would just get drunk, and my daughter was being treated really badly, so we got a apartment. I was getting my **** together and not drinking, but she continued to, she got pregnant. She stopped drinking, and we moved into my parents house.

 

At this time after she had our 2nd child, I got my **** together and took full time responsibility for all 3 children, and stayed home while she worked. Really becoming a great parent. This went on for 2 years, with her apparently trying to hid the fact she was drinking all the time. I was so busy taking care of a new born, and 2 other children I really didn't have time to pay that much attention to her drinking.

 

I started getting wise, when we made over those 2 years, with no bills, but her car, over 90 thousand, and we literally had jack ****. We owned a **** ass couch, and 2 tvs. Well when she got home late from work, I started talking to her about it, and she flipped out. Then another night, I had a few beers with her that she bought, and i wanted to dance with the children, it was like 8 pm on a Saturday, and she flipped out saying they all needed to go to bed. This ended up with her braking our TV, my computer, and a few various other things.

 

I forgave her of this, and she bought another tv. Then like 2 weeks later, she just never came back home, till like 9am, with out telling me anything. I told her what the hell, and I was pissed, and she acted like it didnt matter at all. Then I forgave her, and she did it again, I even forgave that one. Then she did 3 more times, and I am like get the **** out.

 

Come to find out she was spending her time at a bar, with a fat hillbilly again, a different one this time. Anyways she left, and for like 2 months I watched the kids, while she lived in her apartment. She would go to the bar like every weekend, and waste all her money like normal, not paying any of her bills. Which what ever I just wanted to be with my kids. At that time i still didn't know about this other guy. One night, i decided to go to the bar she goes to. This is how i found out she was going to the bar with her other boyfriend she cheated on me with, her new boy friend, that i just met, which apparently was helping raise my children, with out my knowledge, and was getting them to call him father.

 

Anyways this is when i had enough, and totally broke it off with everything, and told her I never want to see her or the children again. I am doing good now, own a house and 3 acres to my self, and dont waste any money on alcohol. She of course still wastes all her money on alcohol, lottery tickets, and cigarettes.

 

The only thing I miss is my children, but I cant deal with her lies, alcohol abuse, and thinking its ok for her to have done what she did. Its kinda funny for a man to be in other situation, so maybe some one can take strength in that haha. She def in the end beat me, abused me, treated me like garbage, and never shared any of the money, while i stayed home and watched all our children.

 

I am still pissed, not that she cheated on me, but that she is gonna mess up my daughters minds. I guess she can only date people who are alcoholics, because our relationship really fell apart when i stopped being one. Now she is with another one. So it gives a nice warm feeling when i think about it, that all she does is get wasted and hangs out with drug addicts, who all have children.

 

So thanks if you dont ban me, it felt good to write it out haha. I dont think there is anything good in any of it, but at least she gave me a good reason, as to why I will never drink ever again, and am thankful she doesnt live with me any more.

 

All I know is the whole thing left a seriously bad taste in my mouth, and I dont think I will ever trust any one in a relationship again. Not to mention I much rather live alone. It gets ruff some times, but as a wise man once told me, its just a feeling it will go away, and it does.

 

It might be a bit messed up for me to not see the children again, but I cant handle her any more. All she does is lie, cheat, steal, and act crazy, thinking its ok to not tell me what is going on with the children. She also loves using the kids to get to me, and try to use me.

Edited April 5, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Edited for readability

[veggirl]

You both sound really horrible and I pity the children in this situation because they are all going to grow up to be totally f*cked up.

 

If you loved your children why wouldn't you get custody and take them with you?

 

Ugh your post is sickening on all ends. Congrats on contributing to more fatherless children!

[Auspecial]

Makasoul,

 

Good for you, that you were able to pull yourself together, both for yourself and all those kids! Well done!

 

It is so sad when families are split up for any reason. There is so much you have to offer for the kids and you are probably already their anchor in the winds of their turbulent mother.

 

Is it possible for you to detach from her but still be there for them? Even if it seems somewhat of a game, to sacrifice your comfort for these little ones who have relied on you seems very important, although uncomfortable and unfortunate that it had to go down in this way. But they are innocent in all of this. If you want them to be strong people, IMO you have to stick around as best you can.

[makasouleater69]

You both sound really horrible and I pity the children in this situation because they are all going to grow up to be totally f*cked up.

 

If you loved your children why wouldn't you get custody and take them with you?

 

Ugh your post is sickening on all ends. Congrats on contributing to more fatherless children!

 

Yep its that easy, you just get custody, bam. I prolly could get custody if I tried hard enough, I have my own house ect. But I anit gonna go through a court system to do it. I asked her to leave the children with me, or at least her mother, or my parents, but she refused, because she makes to much free money off them. As far as being fatherless, the first father of her children shot him self, because he couldnt deal with her messed up ways, at least i didnt go that route. If the time comes, and she messes up bad, such as getting a DWI ect, which she will eventually, I will be there to talk the kids. Tech they arent fatherless any ways she has a new boy friend..... He seems like a good guy, minus that he drinks all the time, but hey, from what i got he treated them well, so its all good.

As far as dealing with her, hell no, it anit happening. She will just try to manipulate me with the children and get me to have a pity party for her, and prolly end up trying to convience me to let her come live at my house again.

[makasouleater69]

Makasoul,

 

Good for you, that you were able to pull yourself together, both for yourself and all those kids! Well done!

 

It is so sad when families are split up for any reason. There is so much you have to offer for the kids and you are probably already their anchor in the winds of their turbulent mother.

 

Is it possible for you to detach from her but still be there for them? Even if it seems somewhat of a game, to sacrifice your comfort for these little ones who have relied on you seems very important, although uncomfortable and unfortunate that it had to go down in this way. But they are innocent in all of this. If you want them to be strong people, IMO you have to stick around as best you can.

 

You are def right, I should, but I dont think i can be that strong, to deal with her lies all the time.