smg15 Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 (edited) Do we pay for our own food? I mean I am used to paying once we see each other the second time after the first meet so I was wondering should we pay for our own food tonight? Edited April 4, 2015 by smg15
fitnessfan365 Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 The trick is planning something really low key and inexpensive so that isn't an issue. Grab an ice cream, a coffee, or meet at a place where you can walk around and chat. If you're spending more than $10 on a first "meet" you're doing it wrong. 2
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 The trick is planning something really low key and inexpensive so that isn't an issue. Grab an ice cream, a coffee, or meet at a place where you can walk around and chat. If you're spending more than $10 on a first "meet" you're doing it wrong. Guess I messed up, I spent $30-lol It was me who suggested the SPORTS BAR because she wanted to watch the game tonight so I figured I would be less nervous in that type of setting. All I can say is it was a lot better than the last date because something happened tonight that didn't happen on the last 2 dates "she laughed more than once" Neither of the girls on the last two dates laughed ONCE 1
smackie9 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 It's possible that it was more relaxed, watching a game, drinks and not straight face to face at some brightly lit coffee place.
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 It's possible that it was more relaxed, watching a game, drinks and not straight face to face at some brightly lit coffee place. That's why I chose the sports bar
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Do we pay for our own food? I mean I am used to paying once we see each other the second time after the first meet so I was wondering should we pay for our own food tonight? Yes you pay. Men pay. Is there even a question??? 2
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 Yes you pay. Men pay. Is there even a question??? I was thinking it was different for a FIRST MEET AND GREET
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 I was thinking it was different for a FIRST MEET AND GREET I don't think so. Make it inexpensive - drink, coffee, ice cream but IMO men pay! If I were to meet a man and he didn't pay I'd be turned off. It's just the chivalrous thing to do but I'm very traditional in that regard. Did you like the girl? 2
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 I don't think so. Make it inexpensive - drink, coffee, ice cream but IMO men pay! If I were to meet a man and he didn't pay I'd be turned off. It's just the chivalrous thing to do but I'm very traditional in that regard. Did you like the girl? Yes So if I go on 4 first meets in a row and never see the girl again that means I am just throwing money away. I don't like that at all
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Yes So if I go on 4 first meets in a row and never see the girl again that means I am just throwing money away. I don't like that at all I guess if you see her and immediately know you never want to see her again you can make her pay but I still think you paying is the right thing to do. Meet for coffee. Low key and very inexpensive. What is your issue with doing that? And I have a question - how do you get the girls to pay? I have never paid on a first meet nor have I offered.
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Yes So if I go on 4 first meets in a row and never see the girl again that means I am just throwing money away. I don't like that at all I believe the man should pay but that doesn't mean I don't think once the relationship is established she shouldn't ever offer. The woman should pay sometimes once a relationship is established. But at the beginning the man should pursue the woman. And if a guy is really into you he wouldn't have it any other way from my experience.
smackie9 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Why is it throwing money away? This is how dating/ courtship is. This is how men show their worth to a lady. So what's a cup of coffee worth these days really..... I have taken guys out on dates and paid, never thought for one moment I was "throwing my money away".
smackie9 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Guys usually feel it's a bad sign if she reaches for the check or quickly offers to pay her share. But eveyone has different expectations. Anyways if you can't get past the first date, you need to work on your game.
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 Why is it throwing money away? This is how dating/ courtship is. This is how men show their worth to a lady. So what's a cup of coffee worth these days really..... I have taken guys out on dates and paid, never thought for one moment I was "throwing my money away". I am talking about if I go on 3 first meet and greets and nothing comes out of none of them, that means I wasted $30-50 I can't count the first 2 because my conversation was so bad and it was no laughter. Today's date was a lot better because it didn't feel like a interview and we actually had a conversation with laughter.
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Yes So if I go on 4 first meets in a row and never see the girl again that means I am just throwing money away. I don't like that at all SMG - how old are you? Just curious..
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 SMG - how old are you? Just curious.. early 30's
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 I am talking about if I go on 3 first meet and greets and nothing comes out of none of them, that means I wasted $30-50 I can't count the first 2 because my conversation was so bad and it was no laughter. Today's date was a lot better because it didn't feel like a interview and we actually had a conversation with laughter. Well, there's your problem. Make the initial meet for coffee!!! If you like them date two can be a proper date. There... problem solved.
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 Well, there's your problem. Make the initial meet for coffee!!! If you like them date two can be a proper date. There... problem solved. well since it's spring time maybe the next coffee date can be outside.
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 well since it's spring time maybe the next coffee date can be outside. Yes, perfect! I agree spending $30-$50 on a first meet is too much. I only agree to first meets for coffee because if I don't like him I don't want to be stuck with him long! I once had a guy INSIST on dinner so I reluctantly agreed and it was brutal. Never again.
smackie9 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 What's brutal is for a first date going dutch and him expecting sex .... 1
SunnySide0418 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 What's brutal is for a first date going dutch and him expecting sex .... Ok, you win! That is brutal. I left out the part of being mauled in the parking lot by the guy after the awful dinner. Ugh..
smackie9 Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Ok, you win! That is brutal. I left out the part of being mauled in the parking lot by the guy after the awful dinner. Ugh.. OMG! I hope you kicked him in the nuts!! Us women have to be so damn careful.
Gaeta Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 smg15 I am glad it went well and you had fun!!! Did you tell her you'd like to see her again?
Author smg15 Posted April 5, 2015 Author Posted April 5, 2015 smg15 I am glad it went well and you had fun!!! Did you tell her you'd like to see her again? No I wasn't sure if I would come off as desperate so I didn't say anything just hugged
Gaeta Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 No I wasn't sure if I would come off as desperate so I didn't say anything just hugged You need to indicate your interest in her. You need to make it clear you'd like to see her again and you let her decide if it's a yes or a no. You don't ever dance around the pot like this if you like a girl! You have 2 options: A. You tell her right at the end of the date you enjoyed yourself and would like to do it again! If she replied she'd like that as well then you book that second date right then and there. B. You contact her after the date and tell her you enjoyed meeting her and would like to do it again soon. If she replies positively you book that second date then and there.
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