jennybrookes Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 I had only been with him for 3 months but caught very strong feelings and love and care for him a lot. (I am 19, him 21). But recently things have just been getting bad. He became a bit withdrawn and less affectionate, and constantly said I was 'dull', 'boring', had 'no character, no conversation', and the other night when he was drunk he said that I offer him nothing and none of his ex's never made him feel like that. So I cannot wrap my head around why he is still with me and tells me he loves me if he feels that way. Although he can be lovely a lot of the time I just feel like I can't cope. I also caught him liking another girls pictures on Instagram, and he had been doing it for some time since I had been with him. When I confronted him about it, he said he would never do it again. Today I found out he did (as petty as just 'liking' a photo is it still annoyed me a lot and made my heart sink.) He also liked one of his ex's photo's yesterday. He constantly puts me down and makes me feel like I am not good enough. He is in Amsterdam on holiday at the moment, and last night I was drinking with my friends and sent him a text a long the lines of 'I'm not happy in this relationship and neither are you, let's just go our separate ways'. Obviously he never replied as he probably doesn't care and is on holiday. Today I woke up feeling so terrible and regretted it instantly. I sent another text apologizing, again he obviously didn't reply. But earlier on I found out that he had been liking that girl's photos again even though he said he wouldn't, and I sent him a really angry text, telling him to never contact me again, and that I deserve better, and how I don't know how his ex put up with him for so long, and blocked his number and deleted it. I feel so hurt, he is my first real love and even though it has only been 3 months we have been together I am going to miss him so much, I am hurting so bad. I don't know how I will go on and am out of a job at the moment, so have nothing better to do that sit around and mope and think about it. Did I do the right thing?
Throldur Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 I had only been with him for 3 months but caught very strong feelings and love and care for him a lot. (I am 19, him 21). But recently things have just been getting bad. He became a bit withdrawn and less affectionate, and constantly said I was 'dull', 'boring', had 'no character, no conversation', and the other night when he was drunk he said that I offer him nothing and none of his ex's never made him feel like that. So I cannot wrap my head around why he is still with me and tells me he loves me if he feels that way. Although he can be lovely a lot of the time I just feel like I can't cope. I also caught him liking another girls pictures on Instagram, and he had been doing it for some time since I had been with him. When I confronted him about it, he said he would never do it again. Today I found out he did (as petty as just 'liking' a photo is it still annoyed me a lot and made my heart sink.) He also liked one of his ex's photo's yesterday. He constantly puts me down and makes me feel like I am not good enough. He is in Amsterdam on holiday at the moment, and last night I was drinking with my friends and sent him a text a long the lines of 'I'm not happy in this relationship and neither are you, let's just go our separate ways'. Obviously he never replied as he probably doesn't care and is on holiday. Today I woke up feeling so terrible and regretted it instantly. I sent another text apologizing, again he obviously didn't reply. But earlier on I found out that he had been liking that girl's photos again even though he said he wouldn't, and I sent him a really angry text, telling him to never contact me again, and that I deserve better, and how I don't know how his ex put up with him for so long, and blocked his number and deleted it. I feel so hurt, he is my first real love and even though it has only been 3 months we have been together I am going to miss him so much, I am hurting so bad. I don't know how I will go on and am out of a job at the moment, so have nothing better to do that sit around and mope and think about it. Did I do the right thing? Yes, you did. Though it is generally never a good idea to like a girls pictures on facebook/instagram if you're in a relationship, sometimes you have to find the context. I did it once with my previous girlfriend and she got mad. I stopped. Though, the pictures I was liking was of a co-worker who had a baby with her ex and was going out for the first time since it happened and it had been 2 years. I was just being supportive. Though, he was liking an exes photographs, so that's completely wrong. It was only a few months so really you didn't invest too much time into someone who is so indifferent and clearly not complimentary. He's just an ******* and be glad you figured it out this early rather than later. A true guy will always make you feel beautiful, smart, will value your time together, be supportive of you, and won't constantly put you down. Guys who put their girlfriends down constantly are just trying to control them by ruining their self-esteem so they won't leave them and will put up with things, like where this guy is clearly headed, cheating. 2
Marco Valerio Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 Yes, no doubt!!!! He was not a good catch at all!!! 1
spiderowl Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 I am sorry you are feeling so bad. You did the right thing in drawing a line in the sand over your boyfriend's behaviour. He was being totally disrespectful. Relationships are very much about respect. If your guy does not treat you respectfully, he does not deserve you (or anyone else for that matter). Your gut instinct was to be angry and tell him to take a hike. It makes total sense. I know it hurts to do this but what was the alternative? Maybe you could have argued it out with him but it sounds like he maintained his position that everything was your fault anyway. He deserved to be kicked out and he must know that. Once you've got over this hurt - and you will do - you will know better what to look out for in a guy. This guy has taught you what to avoid. You should feel proud that you called him out on his behaviour and showed him you are not going to allow him to abuse you. 2
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