Internet Dating Situation

[Soraca]

Hello everyone,

 

I bit of quick advice will be appreciated. Long story short, I met a girl or made contact through an internet personals site. We exchanged phone numbers and spoke a number of times over a two-week period. Then I suggested we meet up for lunch or coffee. We made plans to meet up this past Sunday but she called me “last minute” to cancel but didn’t say why. She did suggest getting together during the week and said she would get back to me.

 

So after a few days of not hearing from her, I called her last night. After a few minutes of small talk, she apologized for canceling last minute and said she got cold feet. This was primarily because the last guy she spoke with seemed very nice on the phone but when she didn’t feel any “connection” in person, he flipped out on her and got really nasty. So this has obviously added to her apprehension about meeting people this way.

 

She asked me what my expectations were and I told her I was looking to meet someone for a real relationship but I always start out slowly and develop a friendship first. Although she too is ready \ looking to settle down (she told me this), she obviously had her guard up right now. So as we continued to talk, she suddenly suggests we meet up briefly tonight, which we are going to do.

 

So my question is: Is there any tips anyone can give me? I know I have to be myself and I want to impress her but I obviously need to keep in mind what happened to her last time.

 

Thanks-

Soraca

[prisoner]

do not over analyse or mover think. are you this other guy? do you want her to forget him or think about him all the time?

 

just meet her and then the two of you can decide what is next. you may not like her enough to have coffee with her. you may decide the same about her as she did about the last guy.

 

she may not like you. there is no mountain here. you are not being asked to fly. you are not being asked to swim in the deep end. it is just a date. it is not even romantic. it is just a meeting. not even a tryst. if it works out, great. go slow. step by step.

 

if it doesn't you will forget that it happened and by the time you remember it did you will have moved on.

 

have fun.

[Mary3]

Most important : Just be yourself.

 

By that I mean : don't be someone or something you are not...because later it confuses the girl.

 

Its okay to feel nervous . Just try to relax and enjoy the date. Hopefully you will both get along well. If not, you can just be honest and tell her that you dont feel a strong connection.

 

I like your approach of being friends first I would not have any expectations... but its really great when you do meet and there is chemistry. If there isnt any chemistry or connection on your part, then just be honest with her and tell her you just see a *friendship connection* only. I think you will do just fine.

 

Be careful of the * flakers * . People who don't show up for the date. Be prepared that might happen tonite. Have a backup plan incase she is a *no show*. And dont take it personally.

 

Good Luck.

 

It sounds like she got burned before and is just being cautious.

[alphamale]

Originally posted by Soraca

So my question is: Is there any tips anyone can give me?

Yes, move on to the next one. This woman sounds like a nut case.