Why do men ALWAYS come back?

[Iluvsushi11]

The second time me and my ex broke up, i was heart broken and shattered. I decided to do NC and we ended up not speaking for a whole month. Then out of no where he called me up at midnight one evening....and texted me a long message saying how he hopes im doing ok n hope everything is well. Also that i will always be that one girl whos too good to be true. I didnt pick up his calls n he noticed i forwarded some of them so he began calling n calling n calling until i had to just turn my phone off.

Why do why guys alwayysss come back ?

[carhill]

It's easier to facilitate sex with someone one has had sex with before than to score new sexual opportunities.

 

That's one reason.

[seminoles84]

Booooooooty call.

[elaine567]

Some men will call you up years later, in the hope of some sex.

[central]

It's easier to facilitate sex with someone one has had sex with before than to score new sexual opportunities.

 

That's one reason.

 

Yes, that's the boomerwang phenomenon.

[NC-Thomas]

Stop geneneralizing, it's not like all men come back..

 

1. Easy sex.

2. Scarcity thinking.

[FancyFace]

They don't ALWAYS come back, but when they do, it's to use you up. Sex, companionship, sex, ego boost, sex, bail money, sex, reference for their job interview, sex.

[carhill]

Unfinished business is another reason. One saw this in the celebrity realm with Burton and Taylor, to the point they remarried and divorced again a short time later. They weren't 'done' yet.

 

Ha, ha I had to laugh just now remembering one fMW complaining, just a few years ago, the former boss whom she had a PA with back in the 80's still hit on her 20+ years later at a function where she, her boyfriend and he happened to be at the same time. That was probably more sex than unfinished business but one never knows.

 

Men are the aggressors, the pursuers, the conquerors. Successful men don't get that way by taking each setback, tucking their tail between their legs and walking away. One aspect to examine with the subset who 'always' come back is are they used to getting what they want by being persistent about it. In general, men are pragmatists. If the guy is always coming back, he does it because it, in general, works.

[Cinnamonstix]

Not sure why the majority of posters here think that the reasons to come back are only self-serving and manipulative.

 

Sometimes people (ie. not just men) come back because they genuinely feel they made a mistake or used the time away to figure out what they want: you.

 

That said, exes don't always come back.

[ZiggyZoo]

I've never had an ex come back, and when the dumper, never pursued an ex either. Maybe I've dragged my relationships out past the point of no return, but I've never wanted to have anything to do with my exs.

 

Having said that, this is well after I've gotten over them, etc. In the early stages of recovery is a different animal, and I thank my stars that my exs have stayed away during this period.

[carhill]

Sometimes people (ie. not just men) come back because they genuinely feel they made a mistake or used the time away to figure out what they want: you.

 

Yep, not uncommon and I include it in 'unfinished business'. The base feelings of attraction and chemistry/interest are there and whatever had precipitated the prior breakup wasn't sufficient to erase them and, with time, a person may change (probably!) and in a way which causes them to wish to continue with the unfinished business. Their feelings of attraction and memories of interaction impel new action and they 'come back'.

[acapelo_dp]

I've never had an ex come back after I told them NC.

[seminoles84]

Not sure why the majority of posters here think that the reasons to come back are only self-serving and manipulative.

 

Sometimes people (ie. not just men) come back because they genuinely feel they made a mistake or used the time away to figure out what they want: you.

 

That said, exes don't always come back.

 

I'm specifically talking about the OP. This guy waits til midnight to text her.. come on.

[Cinnamonstix]

I'm specifically talking about the OP. This guy waits til midnight to text her.. come on.

 

Fair enough. I was more referring to the subject of the thread.

[gnick]

I have a big bullseye on my calendar for Dec of this year. I was dumped and at that time I'm going to try contacting her .if unsuccessful once a year untill I am

[Simon Phoenix]

I have a big bullseye on my calendar for Dec of this year. I was dumped and at that time I'm going to try contacting her .if unsuccessful once a year untill I am

 

For real dude?

[gnick]

No not really

[dyna85]

For real dude?

 

Lollll, I just died.