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Met a great girl but had to friend zone her


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Posted

Had a good date with a girl I met two weeks ago but she told me she's separated and I don't want to deal with the drama of that in my life. I really like hanging out with her, she's smart, we click, but I don't want to be in a relationship with her.

 

When I called her and told her, she was ok with it and we continued to talk. We hung again on Saturday and had a great time. My concern is the sexual tension seems to be building as we were both a little more touchy towards each other although we have not kissed. Hugs, arm grabbing, etc.

 

Should I just play it cool and let the friendship progress naturally? Do you think she's concerned I'm not attracted to her? Maybe she wants more now?

Posted

The friendzone. It does not mean what you think it means, according to your post.

 

If you really friendzoned her, you wouldn't be thinking about escalating, which you seem to be doing.

  • Like 5
Posted

who suggested the separation?

 

are they divorcing?

 

or playing a game with you as a mere pawn or even weapon in an on-going marital game?

  • Author
Posted
The friendzone. It does not mean what you think it means, according to your post.

 

If you really friendzoned her, you wouldn't be thinking about escalating, which you seem to be doing.

 

Im trying to keep it plutonic, but she seemed like she wants to possibly escalate it? I suck at picking up on cues.

 

 

When we hung out Saturday, she asked me if I wanted to go back to her apartment so she could let her dog out. Maybe she wants FWB?

Posted
Im trying to keep it plutonic, but she seemed like she wants to possibly escalate it? I suck at picking up on cues.

 

 

When we hung out Saturday, she asked me if I wanted to go back to her apartment so she could let her dog out. Maybe she wants FWB?

 

If you want to keep it platonic, then don't allow her to be touchy with you.

 

If you suck on picking up clues, then ask her what her intentions are.

 

If she wants a FWB, then ask her. Is that what you want? How is that not as messy as being in a relationship? She's still separated.

Posted
she asked me if I wanted to go back to her apartment so she could let her dog out

Let her dog out...? Never heard it called that before!

 

If you don't want a relationship with this woman due to her separated status then I suggest you steer well clear. Tell her she's got your number and when the ink is dry on her divorce she should definitely give you a call, but until then you're not interested in taking things further. But don't hang around waiting, date other people.

  • Like 1
Posted

What's the problem with her being separated? If there's no drama going on with broken hearts or crazy ex, why should it be a problem?

  • Author
Posted
What's the problem with her being separated? If there's no drama going on with broken hearts or crazy ex, why should it be a problem?

 

 

Because she's still married?

Posted

It really depends if she is "on a break" or she is totally separated, if she is totally separated then divorce is often a formality.

 

How long has she been separated for?

If not that long, then rebound is probably a possibility.

Posted

Exactly. I don't see separated people as married. The only issue I see is possible rebound or people not being mentally ready to date yet. Is she legally separated? (You have to submit papers to court to be legally separated).

 

It really depends if she is "on a break" or she is totally separated, if she is totally separated then divorce is often a formality.

 

How long has she been separated for?

If not that long, then rebound is probably a possibility.

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