thorin Posted March 30, 2015 Posted March 30, 2015 Uhm, so...Im 21 years old, I dont have much dating experience. I've had 2 relationships - 1 month, and 9 months. The second girl broke up with me about a month ago. I am looking forward to meet new girls, go out for some dates, anything. And it seems I cant get it. I mostly focus on meeting girls in pubs/clubs. I go out almost every second day, for a month already. But I cant get past small talks, a couple of minutes, thats when I dont know how to hold a conversation and it ends. Also, most girls are not alone, so its more difficult talking to a group. Also, I dont talk to much women, maybe like two or three girls every time I go out. Well, i just dont know...where can I meet women. Pubs/clubs are o.k., but for 5-10min talk, then Im out, cause either my friends are waiting, or I just cant hold the conversation. The street...well, its unnatural for me to start talking with some random girl...because, about what...? Meetings? No meetings in my time that girls would attend to. All my friends have given up on picking up girls. None has motivation. I dont wanna end up like this. And I would like to have another girl, just to forget about the former one : D Its just that...uhh, I dont know what to do anymore.
d0nnivain Posted March 30, 2015 Posted March 30, 2015 Are you in school? Look around your classes. Are you working? Can you meet women near where you work -- in the elevator, where you get your morning coffee, etc.? Have you tried OLD? I don't understand why you refuse to go to meetings. If you have a hobby or a passion, pursue it. You may meet someone who shares your enjoyment.
Author thorin Posted March 30, 2015 Author Posted March 30, 2015 Hahah, I'm in college, so I guess that's much better than school or work I don't know, I just think it's strange to start talking to some random girl out of the void, without knowing what could we have in common to talk about.
d0nnivain Posted March 31, 2015 Posted March 31, 2015 If this random girl goes to your school, you have that in common. In college, finding a new person to date is the easiest it will ever be in your life. It gets harder after graduation so make an effort.
Toodaloo Posted March 31, 2015 Posted March 31, 2015 In college, finding a new person to date is the easiest it will ever be in your life. It gets harder after graduation so make an effort. lol I love your bluntness Don but this is oh so true! Go to all the parties join a sports club and go have the time of your life OP.
clam Posted March 31, 2015 Posted March 31, 2015 Join clubs at your college or university. You will meet people who share the same interests. Join a walking/hiking/biking club... do you have an interest in these things? Join a horticulture club if you like gardening. Go to book club meetings sponsored at local book stores. Attend guest lectures at your college. Play sports on a co-ed intramural team. Start your OWN club -- Movie Watchers? Duck feeding at the park? Bird watching? Video-gaming club? Poetry Club? Cooking club? Volunteer at an organization that interests you. GoodWill? Animal shelter? Library? United Way? Soup kitchen? Church groups? Join a gym and get in the best shape of your life. Travel. You can meet very interesting people along your journey. Are you broke? (as most college students are?? ) Start a Penny-pinchers/money saving club or join one. Lots of ways to meet new people besides pubs and bars. 1
oldshirt Posted March 31, 2015 Posted March 31, 2015 All my friends have given up on picking up girls. None has motivation. I dont wanna end up like this.. This is your problem right there. Leave these guys behind and get some new friends. You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. If the guys you are spending your time with are slackers in grungy sweatpants playing Xbox, then find some popular guys that get girls and start running around with them. In time their popularity will start rubbing off on you.
Cupid's Puppet Posted April 1, 2015 Posted April 1, 2015 You're in college and you don't know how to meet women? Thanks for the laugh!!! Dating tip: Ask a young lady to tutor you in a subject even if you aren't struggling in the class. Just ask her that you're looking for a study group. If the girl you're interested in makes worse grades than you, reevaluate your preferences.
SupportiveGuy Posted April 2, 2015 Posted April 2, 2015 If you want a girl to talk to you for more than five minutes, master the basic social technique of interrogation. If all you're doing is talking about yourself, you have a much smaller chance of catching her interest. If you can quickly target subjects that women like, and you can notice that spark of interest, or when the speed and tone of her voice changes, then you can get her to forget her bedtime and her job and anything else so she can keep talking to you. This works for anyone really. You can engage with them in some light conversation, but if you don't spark any interest from them, you won't last more than five minutes. Also, sometimes you can do a terrible job, and she'll laugh and chatter, which means she might like you, or you can do a perfect job and she will simply not be interested in you. You're probably the same way yourself.
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