sxbmb3388 Posted March 29, 2015 Posted March 29, 2015 so, basically my ex boyfriend and i had been together since we were 13, we are both 23 now and were just about to move in together. this was 6 months ago- that was when we broke up. Now i have read up on the G.i.G.S. concept and i believe we both suffered from it. i know i definitely did. i was so wanting to see what else was out there. i didn't realise it at the time, but i was very unhappy in myself, and once i became happy within myself, I stopped worrying about my relationship, it took me about 2 years all in all to come out the other side, and when i came out of it, was when my ex was going through the same thing. He went from being the most loving, attentive, complimentary person, to very insecure, low self esteem, and unhappy with every aspect of his life in the space of about 2 months. i could see this, and I was going through my own troubles so didn't pay him as much attention as maybe I could have done. Our relationship was on the whole very good, no cheating abuse etc. One day he states he's not sure if he was in love with me anymore. The same feeling i had felt two years prior. i recognised this and just supported him through it. Thats all i could do really. Things got bad. very bad, we had a total breakdown in communication and we broke up. it was mutual. i couldn't be in a 'half attempt' relationship, and i knew that he would have to figure this one out for himself. The two months after our break up were the toughest. he would text me constantly, engaging in small talk, trying to get our mutual friends to meet up constantly, I eventually had to stop contact so i went NC and it has been that way for 4 months. When i stopped contact, i heard through a mutual friend that he had a new girlfriend, something which really did hurt, but at the same time it was a huge help to the moving on process. It was what i needed to stop thinking about him so much and for those 4 months i didn't really think about him as much. anyways recently his best friend had got in contact with me and explained that my ex doesn't speak to him anymore, and he is doing things which i would NEVER have expected him to do. he quit his good job for a lower paid one, moved out and doesn't speak to any of his best friends anymore. i haven't been tempted to contact him, since we broke up- and never have, because I've been quite busy working on myself, which has been awesome. Every time we have been in contact, its him contacting me. We parted on amicable terms. I am slightly concerned, as his best friend is really angry with him because he hasn't seen him for the past 4 months, and when we were together, he was obsessed with his friends. also I would state that in his new relationship they spend a great deal of time together. like everyday. I hope he's happy, i really do, but i just don't understand why he's not speaking with his best friends. its quite upsetting because his best friend is really very upset about it, and i said to him once they're out the 'honeymoon stage', he will have his friend back. All of his behaviour post BU has been extremely unlike him! has anyone been in this situation, got any ideas of what to say to his best friend, or could perhaps shed some light on it? sorry about that but i'm just overwhelmed by it all!
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