blue_eyes18 Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 I am so upset. NOt crying, but I feel like ****. It sucks so bad that the guy I startedl iking isn't talking to me anymore. The reason being, I think, is cause I got pissed at him when I got stuck in his yard, cause he wouldn't help me out. He was high as hell, and started being a dick face. SO I called my brother and it made him mad. When I tried talking to him, he said we shouldn't talk anymore. He was real calm about it. I wonder if I should call him. No I shouldn't. But I startedl iking him, then he started saying **** like he liked me but just couldn't be iwth someone all the time. Ok, skip a bunch of ya-ya and basically it boils down to maybe he didn't want the same thing I did. He even said so once or twice that he thinks we had different opinions on what relationships should be like. Maybe I did call him too much or something. I don't think so though. I guess he was just a player, or trying to be, haha and that he really didn't want the same thing as me. He seemed like it though sometimes. I guess we started arguing the most when I kept having sex with him and then told him I could't anymore(cause heck, I wasn't getting exactly what I needed out of the relationship, and it hurt me too much to just screw him) It wasn't fair. Well, anyways, I still like him, but he has not called me. I guess I will just move on and forget about it. MAybe it's better that way if all I was gonna do was get hurt every other day or something. Maybe there are things he just thought I could not accept about him. Or maybe he was full of **** the whole time. Probably. ANyways, it sucks so bad, Any suggestions on what to do or say to him if I call him? I prolly shouldn't call though, casue the last time I talked to him like 3 days ago, he said we shouldn't talk anymore. That's good I guess, cause I can't be happy doing EVERYTHING his way or no way. It makes me sad and I end up feleing kinda used. I think that's all he does to girls anyways, someone told me that's how he does girls. He is 24 and still lives at home. maybe that has something to do with it? lol Anyways, I guess I just need to get over it. Why is it I always mess with the losers or something lately? He really was after me at first. Then I just got disappointed. Why do I always go with the ones who intentionally hurt me? MAybe he wasn't trying to. But he sure did seem like he wanted a real relationship at first. Then I guess when I started liking him he started being another way. That sucks. I guess he just wanted someone to screw around with when it was convenient for him.
Author blue_eyes18 Posted April 13, 2005 Author Posted April 13, 2005 But sometimes he would grab me and start daincing with me and being so so sweet. And his smile, awww. lol He was nice too, not all bad.....
Author blue_eyes18 Posted April 13, 2005 Author Posted April 13, 2005 I just wonder why I still want to be with him even after he said that. Why do I have to want to be with him but he said we shouldn't talk anymore? That makes me feel so stupid!!
prisoner Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 do you really want to call him? do you really think you miss him? can you go a day without him? two? what will you do the next time he treats you badly? the time after that? where do you want things to be? everyone always talks about where people want things to go: i say where do you want things to be? figure that out. do you want to be happy? do you want to be in an LTR? do you just want soem thing casual? I think you may have to answer some questions before he gets involved. then when he and if he does get involvced just ask him what the deal is. no yelling. just straight up talk. does he want a friend? a girl? an LTR? a casual thing? does he care that you are so turned upside down? are you turned upside down? what if he comes running? flowers and hugs? puppy dogs and ice cream? a big black harley and a tattoo? will he ever be what the doctor ordered or is he just 'right now' and there may or may not be a 'next? you seem bright and sweet and full of laughs. do you think you deserve better than someone who has to debate to help you? what happens when you really need something?
Author blue_eyes18 Posted April 14, 2005 Author Posted April 14, 2005 YOu're right, I have thought about this all recently. I just really started liking him, then it all went to heck. He was always saying such sweet things and being so sweet, then all this sudden, it just changed, just like that. He started being ill sometimes, like we would fight over something stupid that he started. I could never tell what kind of mood he would be in. Then he would act like it was my fault, like I did something. he said onetime after I didn't talk to him for like 4 days, I saw him and he asked me if I wanted a relationship still. I didn't know what to do because of how he had acted, but he was being so sweet. he said he wanted one, but that he didn't want to be hurt. Oncewe walked his dog together like 3 miles, haha, and it seemed ok. He was even saying stuff like"Did you talk to so and so" and all this other stuff like it was his business. He acted like we were together. Then just like 2 days later, he was sitting there saying stuff like"Maybe we should just be friends. I like you, but I can't be with someone all the time, 24/7>'" Maybe he just wanted someone around when it was convenient for him. I don't know. I couldn't ever get a straight answer out of him most of the time, even when I was calm as I could be/ It's like no matter what I did, or how I acted, he was ill or something. I don't know, then he would say I was the one fussing. So finally after the other night, almost a week ago now, all that happened when I got stuck in his yard. The whole time I was on the phone, he was just staring at me like he couldn't believe I had called my brother. I was just thinking at the moment how it served him right and that I didn't care if he liked it or not, cause he had no right to be like that to me. When he did that, it made me think he just wanted someone to do everything his way and put up with his ****. Maybe he's not a good boyfriend, althought he could be a great one if he actually WAS one! Ya know? lol I don't know, I haven't talked to him after he said that. He said we shouldn't talk anymore. I bet if i would have never called my brother, he would have kept dong the same thing to me if I would have let him.
Author blue_eyes18 Posted April 14, 2005 Author Posted April 14, 2005 He was trying to be an a**h*** when he didn't help me. That's what I don't get. Maybe he is just not like I thought. It was just a front to get me to like him so he could be this way. He can go to hell.
prisoner Posted April 14, 2005 Posted April 14, 2005 again. i can't tell you what to do but you might consider letting this one disappear and letting something good happen to you next time.
Author blue_eyes18 Posted April 14, 2005 Author Posted April 14, 2005 Thanks, prisoner. You always have THE best advice to give me, and you seem to really understand. Ya know, even if I don't talk to this guy anymore, I know I will go through this mess again with the next one. Bad attitude, I know, but that's what's happened with the past 3 guys that I have talked to/dated.( Well, the reason being for atleast one of them for sure was because I found out he was a drug addict. That was another guy though. ) Ya know, I just wish this guy was always sweet and stuff like he was at first. I really do think now that it was just a put-on. Oh well. Maybe, if I absolutely HAVE to date another guy, lol, maybe next time he won't be such a rotten apple. . .
prisoner Posted April 14, 2005 Posted April 14, 2005 you could actually figure out what it was that attracted you to hiom in the first place and then what was the warning sign (there is always at least one) that told you he was like the others. i have to say: three times is too many. it's important that you understand that you have to break this cycle. you need to meet different men. go somewhere new. make a new friend. call someone you haven't spoken to in a long time. get a new hobby. move. do something because it is unfortunate that you are living with misery. you deserve the happiness.
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