SELdeMER Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 I just want to get some ideas as to what people think is normal So I want to know what people would consider to be too many drinks for their date to consume on a date (I'm not talking about so many that they get sloppy drunk) I have been going on dates with guys from OLD since January, most of these dates take place in little restaurants that serve alcohol. I usually have a non-alcoholic drink because I am tiny and can't handle much and want to be alert and totally present on a first meet or date. Plus, i don't drink often at all anyway and I DO NOT want to be with a man that DOES drink often.. I have no problem if the guy I am with chooses to have a drink though. However, I have noticed that some of the guys have like 4 drinks. One guy had 4 glasses of wine. Another guy had 3 pints of beer and a shot of Jagermeister (third date) , another had 3 pints of beer over a 2 hour lunch date. None of these guys seemed drunk in the least and the sushi lunch guy actually drove home afterward... Would people consider that too much for a date to drink? Like I kept wondering if these guys had drinking problems and I started to think of it as a red flag, but I don't know if this is a normal amount to consume by a grown adult man and I am just being irrational Thoughts?
DatingAdvise Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 Ask the person. But not too direct, you have to do it in playfull manner and do not bother how much someone is drinking. listen how he respond at that, if u don't mind he will tell u the true.
Krieger Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 I don't drink that much any more and if I was on a date with a female and she was dinking to the point she was going to get blackout drunk . I might be turned off by it. I use to drink a lot in my younger years it was bad. I am talking 4 to 5 fifths of alcohol a week and the guy at the liquor store new me by name no need to check ID. My and my roommate drank some much when we stopped the recycle guy had to go on warfare. Not to brag but we would fill a 55 gallon recycle bin full of beer cans and empty fifths.
HansonGirl Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 I just want to get some ideas as to what people think is normal So I want to know what people would consider to be too many drinks for their date to consume on a date (I'm not talking about so many that they get sloppy drunk) I have been going on dates with guys from OLD since January, most of these dates take place in little restaurants that serve alcohol. I usually have a non-alcoholic drink because I am tiny and can't handle much and want to be alert and totally present on a first meet or date. Plus, i don't drink often at all anyway and I DO NOT want to be with a man that DOES drink often.. I have no problem if the guy I am with chooses to have a drink though. However, I have noticed that some of the guys have like 4 drinks. One guy had 4 glasses of wine. Another guy had 3 pints of beer and a shot of Jagermeister (third date) , another had 3 pints of beer over a 2 hour lunch date. None of these guys seemed drunk in the least and the sushi lunch guy actually drove home afterward... Would people consider that too much for a date to drink? Like I kept wondering if these guys had drinking problems and I started to think of it as a red flag, but I don't know if this is a normal amount to consume by a grown adult man and I am just being irrational Thoughts? I think i would "notice" if someone drank more than 2 drinks. 2 drinks seems like a good amount to me. I'd also notice if they had NO drinks and I would wonder if the person doesn't drink at all. Right now I am not drinking because of Lent. but I normally do drink. if the person was just not drinking for some reason, i'd hope they'd say something.
d0nnivain Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 I don't count how much people I am with drink. The only time I did count was a 1st OLD date with a guy who told me he didn't drink. Then he had 4 martinis, 3 before we even sat down for dinner. However, you clearly care about how much your dates drink. Accordingly I would either go to places that don't serve booze or date men who don't drink. You don't get to comment on other people's habits unless it impacts you, for example you don't gave to get in a car with somebody who has been drinking.
Krieger Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 I think i would "notice" if someone drank more than 2 drinks. 2 drinks seems like a good amount to me. I'd also notice if they had NO drinks and I would wonder if the person doesn't drink at all. Right now I am not drinking because of Lent. but I normally do drink. if the person was just not drinking for some reason, i'd hope they'd say something. Is this OK to say to a female I don't drink because I use to feel like I need it to fit in to feel normal and if I drink I will not stop and be black out drunk and you will not get to know the real me.when I drink I am the person I always wanted to be .
Author SELdeMER Posted March 28, 2015 Author Posted March 28, 2015 I think i would "notice" if someone drank more than 2 drinks. 2 drinks seems like a good amount to me. yeah, this is a good way to put it. That's how I feel. Like it stood out to me that they had that many drinks--I just don't know if if is necessarily a 'bad" thing though...that's why I wrote this thread to see what other people think I am not trying to be judgmental here, and I am not opposed to a man that drinks, I drink too--just not much and not often.
Jessie1231 Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 On the first few dates I won't have more than two drinks, just because I know I'll have to drive home at the end of dinner. I somehow have a high alcohol tolerance, so two drinks is enough to relax me but definitely not enough to make me feel close to drunk. Most of my dates have had the same, sometimes one or two more. The only time I ever noticed a problem was the last guy I went on a date with. We went to dinner and he ordered water. That's normal enough. Then he proceeds to pull out four airplane bottles of vodka throughout dinner and drinks those while chasing it with water. THAT was a huge red flag. He then told me he had been drinking vodka before our date too and had to keep going.
HansonGirl Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 On the first few dates I won't have more than two drinks, just because I know I'll have to drive home at the end of dinner. I somehow have a high alcohol tolerance, so two drinks is enough to relax me but definitely not enough to make me feel close to drunk. Most of my dates have had the same, sometimes one or two more. The only time I ever noticed a problem was the last guy I went on a date with. We went to dinner and he ordered water. That's normal enough. Then he proceeds to pull out four airplane bottles of vodka throughout dinner and drinks those while chasing it with water. THAT was a huge red flag. He then told me he had been drinking vodka before our date too and had to keep going. lmao!! that's a red flag AND tacky
HansonGirl Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 Is this OK to say to a female I don't drink because I use to feel like I need it to fit in to feel normal and if I drink I will not stop and be black out drunk and you will not get to know the real me.when I drink I am the person I always wanted to be . hmm I guess it depends on how comfortable you are saying that. To me that would come off weird and maybe judgmental. Like for me, i'd just say, for example if my date orders a beer, and i order an iced tea. i might comment, "normally i'd have a beer too but I just don't feel like drinking tonight." or "i'm not a big drinker" - just something to make it clear I DO drink sometimes, and I am not against drinking. that would be what I am trying to avoid here because a lot of people think a nondrinker would judge them or be a bore to date. I am not saying that's necessarily true, but a lot of people would think that way. For me personally I'd be more willing to go out with a guy who drinks but is not a big drinker than someone who is totally against it and never drinks!
Auspecial Posted March 28, 2015 Posted March 28, 2015 I am not really strict about this, but I on a first date, I usually don't drink at all, or maybe half glass of wine. Never more than 2 glasses on a first date. I'd expect a man to have no more than two drinks, unless we happened to meet for the first time at a bar or party. Which isn't the norm for me.
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