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How did you finally get over it?


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Posted (edited)

Have you ever had feelings for someone (you couldn't have) for a very long time (my feelings are almost 5 years old now). Are you over it now? How did you finally get over it? Do you think I'll have this feelings forever? If so, how can I deal with them? What can I do to make them hurt less?

Edited by LoverOfDance
Posted (edited)

You end up in friendzoned way before i quess. Never ever agree to be platonic friends with someone you adore. Speak alway your intensions. It become painfull, you think you have to be for that person to fall in love with me someday, that a trap, it will never happen.

Edited by DatingAdvise
  • Like 1
Posted

I have fallen for a guy who I think I'll never get to have. It's horrible because it's been forever since i even "liked" someone. I started liking him in late November -- he and I actually got together and had sex several times in the month of January -- but since then....nothing. Just platonic friendship. He is hard to top because he is sooo attractive. I'll never have him. I've resigned myself to it. And NO other guy can match him, not the full package that he is. 1) good-looking, 2) fit, 3) educated / intellectual, 4) tall, 5) funny, 6) charismatic. There is just something about him. I've even gone out with this other guy a couple times who is kinda cute but just doesn't match the other guy's je ne sais quoi.

 

I think someone will top him eventually though. i hope.

Posted

I've only been feeling this "unrequitted" thing for two months though. Could be a lot worse. Being hung up on someone for a year or less is okay to me. Going beyond that is when I start to feel really pathetic. So...with mine being new, I don't beat myself up over being hung up on him. it is what it is.

  • Like 1
Posted
Have you ever had feelings for someone (you couldn't have) for a very long time (my feelings are almost 5 years old now). Are you over it now? How did you finally get over it? Do you think I'll have this feelings forever? If so, how can I deal with them? What can I do to make them hurt less?

 

1. Pursue your own interests.

 

2. Date. Even if it's just casual, or feels like passing the time.

 

3. See the person less.

 

That's pretty much the formula!

  • Like 2
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Posted

@markleymassraff I'm sure someone will :-)

Posted
Have you ever had feelings for someone (you couldn't have) for a very long time (my feelings are almost 5 years old now). Are you over it now? How did you finally get over it? Do you think I'll have this feelings forever? If so, how can I deal with them? What can I do to make them hurt less?

 

You have to try to move on and find someone who values your time, likes you for you and respects your feelings.

 

I had a hard time getting over a lady that lead me on to believe there was so much more until she dropped me like a bad habit.

 

Holding on and trying to make a connection that will never happen only made it worse but I picked myself up and moved on to better things in life aside from relationships.

 

Taking a new direction in life and pursuing a new challenge often helps. It allows your brain to focus on getting past that "someone." Be mindful of the reminders that will bring back those feelings. Don't let them linger, take a deep breath, gather your thoughts and remind yourself why it's best to move on.

Posted

you will move on when you really want to move on

Posted (edited)

Interesting journey for me. Nuts about my last GF. Broke up with her because she had too much drama in her life effecting us. But a few months later, I realized how much I missed her. So for six months I tried to get her back off and on. #1 (Really missing her) - Called, we talked, and she said maybe to plans. So I backed off. #2 (About 50-60% invested) - Two months later, tried again, and once again "maybe". #3 (Basically getting there but still stubborn enough for one final attempt) - Two months later, one final attempt. Same. At this point, I was snapped back to reality. The thing that kept driving me nuts is that she'd answer my call right away all three times, reminisce, say how much she missed me, etc.. Yet she always said maybe. So that's what kept me coming back every two months.

 

Three months later, I sent her a text and we exchanged a handful. Pure formality and nothing else. That finally gave me the closure I needed to realize I no longer felt anything for her. Gave it one more month to fully sink in and then started online dating again. But I can say with full confidence, that taking that year, got me to such a good place. Not only to get over her, but also to come to terms with past dating mistakes. So now because of that year, I have a woman in my life that's different than anyone I've ever met.

Edited by fitnessfan365
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