Mid-30s men, would you marry a late-30s woman?

[xxoo]

Ruby, the men you attract are not going to be men who struggled in their 20s and are making up for lost time with young women. It'll be a man who enjoyed his youth, has matured and achieved, and is seeking an equal partner for the next stage in life (like you).

[edgygirl]

Luckily my eggs are frozen and I don't have to worry about that

 

As someone said, many scientific articles say older man also give their children autism. Did you really think only women's bodies get older?

 

I am glad not all men think like you. And many don't, I know for a fact.

 

Putting other things ahead of getting married does do make a woman less marketable as wife material due to greatly increased risk of birth defects. .

[edgygirl]

And those are the only type of men that matter and that we should want to meet anyway.

 

Ruby, the men you attract are not going to be men who struggled in their 20s and are making up for lost time with young women. It'll be a man who enjoyed his youth, has matured and achieved, and is seeking an equal partner for the next stage in life (like you).

[Krieger]

It's so weird that men here seem to care about who a woman slept or didn't sleep with. Who cares?

 

I see a lot of men answer on okcupid to that question about how experienced you'd like your lover to be? - they all say "Very experienced". I also want a partner who's been around and knows how to have good sex.

 

I didn't want to get married in my early 30s. I had things to do, places to go, I had to take care of my career. Now I am looking for marriage, so what? Does it make me less than a good person? In what planet? Are we talking about small cities where people gossip?

 

I don't care about why a man didn't get married before, I sincerely don't care if he banged the whole town or continent before. What I care about is where did he arrive after that, the lessons he learned from it, what he wants NOW and in the future.

 

Honestly I am also not interested in men who are so small-minded. I like wordly men with open minds.

 

 

Well like I said if a female cant understand the difference between having sex with an ex BF 500 times and the difference between haveing sex with 500 different guys .

 

I does matter if she cant keep a guy and jumps around and still is jumping around and all of sudden she 30 and trying to find a good guy no thanks. If she had real relationship and a few one nightstands it ok ,but going the the bar to pick up a new guy every weekend end is not.

[Noproblem]

I am sorry Op

but I don't see the point of your question

 

 

You already know the answer

you experienced it first hand, you were with a guy who was younger than you and who had no problem with that

 

You pushed him away because of some other qualities and it's time for you to stop listening to your sister anyway..

 

love does not know age or any other obstacles

 

people here speak a lot with their mind

but I am sure they lose their mind over people, and they don't care about what they said earlier when that happened

 

 

 

Don't expect forum members to tell you about what guy will be interested in you or what guys won't

 

Talking is easier than actions

 

If all the guys were to have it their way

 

they all will end up with a 20 something hot and nice girls who are compatible with them 100%, and who all also some what successful and not shallow, blah blah ...

 

But in reality, life doesn't work out this way

 

You, me, them

 

We all end up and fall for the people we never planed to fall for

 

and when this happens

 

We throw these objections that we liked to brag about down the toilet

 

We throw our standards there too!

 

Because we fall for someone for who he/she is

 

 

So, yeah they can say I'm not gonna date an older women

or I am not gonna date some woman who's been with a lot of guys

 

but many of them do that

 

they do that and most of them don't even care

 

 

But when it come to internet

 

they all claim something that has nothing to do with reality!

 

 

Time for you Op to stop playing it safe

go do some risks in your life

 

Date who ever you want

take care of yourself and

 

please

 

Don't tell them i want kids and marriage in the first week

 

All men will run away after hearing that despite of how old they are!

Edited March 26, 2015 by Noproblem

[Buddhist]

It is not only about the women being younger.

 

Younger women are usually thinner, have less wrinkles and are generally significantly more attractive than older women.

 

If you look good for your age and you are just as slim and attractive as a woman who is early 30's - men your age wouldn't want younger.

 

If you don't like competing with younger more attractive women who have less forehead lines - there is always botox and ways to look several years younger if it bothers you. Which I don't think it really does.

 

Personally, there is no way I will reach my late or even MID 30's, and age totally naturally. A bit of botox makes you years younger. But that is just me hah.

 

One of the least healthy attitudes I've seen from a female in a long time. Perhaps this explains the desperation of some women (many in their 20's) who reach for anything in a syringe to try and stop the clock. Which, they never do. They just get weird looking. You cannot hide your years with botox or any other injectible. Every woman who ever tries to do so ends up looking strange. Megan Fox aged herself 10yrs with that stuff. I remember seeing her on the Armani posters and thinking she looked old. I've seen plenty in real life and plenty of the celebrity variety, no thanks I'll age naturally as I've been doing these past decades. There is nothing less attractive than a woman who invests her sense of self in something as fleeting as her appearance.

 

I don't compete with younger women, there is no comparison actually. They can have their fresh faces and tonne of insecurities. I'll keep my cheek bones and stable sense of self. Thank God I learned there is more to life than being an accessory to a man. I don't want for male company even in my dotage. This fear of getting older is just that, a fear that will either rule your life or be one you will overcome. I chose the latter and I'm happier for it.

[Ruby Slippers]

I don't want for male company even in my dotage. This fear of getting older is just that, a fear that will either rule your life or be one you will overcome. I chose the latter and I'm happier for it.

Amen, sister! Though the approaching 4-0 is kind of scary, for the most part, I feel that I'm aging gracefully and staying in the moments. I'm lucky that I've seen a few good friends who are older show me how it's done.

 

I have a few close friends from 40-45. These are accomplished women who don't want kids, running businesses, playing in cool bands, showing their art in galleries, traveling the world, beautiful and some in better shape than I've ever seen them, with no shortage of dating options and marriage offers from mid-20s and up.

 

Because I want a family, I'm being more selective than ever. If I were looking for just dating and casual sex, I could have a new hot date every night for the next year! I'd guess I can look forward to something similar to what my older friends have if the family thing doesn't work out. Doesn't sound so bad!

[Buddhist]

Yes that's my experience as well. Don't be scared to approach 40, it's the best decade to be honest. Inhibitions and insecurities finally bite the dust you realise there is no point in being concerned about the things which worry you in your younger years and you have the financial freedom to do as you choose. I wouldn't turn back the clock for anything. You realise just how much kool aid most people are drinking when they are young...ROFL.

 

Many women are very attractive in their 40's and this whole lie about you put on weight as you get older, is just that a lie. You put on weight if you have not looked after yourself, that's the truth. Women don't get fat because they suffered another birthday, it's because they ate the cake too often....lol! You can be fit and healthy at any age.

 

I'm looking forward to 50 and beyond. Life is great past those terrible years of youth. Enjoy.

[Ruby Slippers]

Many women are very attractive in their 40's and this whole lie about you put on weight as you get older, is just that a lie. You put on weight if you have not looked after yourself, that's the truth. Women don't get fat because they suffered another birthday, it's because they ate the cake too often....lol! You can be fit and healthy at any age.

My mom is almost 70 and mows the yard in a one-piece bathing suit and shorts, and looks remarkably good doing it. My dad is disabled, and she enjoys doing the yard work for exercise. He's almost 80 and is active, trim, and relatively fit as well. No, she doesn't look like a swimsuit model, but she's the same size and has a similar degree of fitness as she did when I was a kid. We still wear the same clothing size.

[Buddhist]

No, she doesn't look like a swimsuit model,

 

Who does? Most women don't look like that at any age. What a lot of people these days have lost sight of is that no matter what someone looks like in their younger years, we all suffer the same fate in our elder. Men and women, equally, no-one escapes the ravages of time. It's just life. I've decided I'll embrace it and get eccentric.

 

Any man who's overly preoccupied with getting a younger, hotter wife will invariably trade in that same wife when she's no longer young and hot. Who wants that? Women need to be picky finding a husband, there are plenty that aren't worth your time. We have to remember that till death do us part usually means that the woman will have her vitallity longer than the man and end up nursing him at the end of life. You'd better have a keeper on your hands in that scenario.

[losangelena]

Many women are very attractive in their 40's and this whole lie about you put on weight as you get older, is just that a lie. You put on weight if you have not looked after yourself, that's the truth. Women don't get fat because they suffered another birthday, it's because they ate the cake too often....lol! You can be fit and healthy at any age.

 

My mom is almost 70 and mows the yard in a one-piece bathing suit and shorts, and looks remarkably good doing it. My dad is disabled, and she enjoys doing the yard work for exercise. He's almost 80 and is active, trim, and relatively fit as well. No, she doesn't look like a swimsuit model, but she's the same size and has a similar degree of fitness as she did when I was a kid. We still wear the same clothing size.

 

Mini-rant ahead:

 

No offense to either of you or your parents—I assume all of you are lovely—but at the end of the day, who cares?! My mom is 50 lbs overweight and has never worked out a day in her life. That doesn't mean that my dad, who was married to her for 30 years before he died, didn't love her all the same until his last dying breath.

 

Society's so hung up on looks. Some people aren't fit and trim at 25 or 37 or 44 or 72. That doesn't mean that someone won't find them attractive and worthy of love and affection. You're both right—looks fade. What's important is a person's ability to love, their kindness, character, and ability to contribute to an equal partnership.

[Buddhist]

My post wasn't intended to mean that being thin is the be all and end all. It was more in response to the worn out urban legend that old=fat=unattractive=any woman over 30, meanwhile men aren't 'old' until they are 70. The misogyny in this thread was pretty nauseating, not least of which because some of actually came from a female.

[Ninjainpajamas]

My post wasn't intended to mean that being thin is the be all and end all. It was more in response to the worn out urban legend that old=fat=unattractive=any woman over 30, meanwhile men aren't 'old' until they are 70. The misogyny in this thread was pretty nauseating, not least of which because some of actually came from a female.

 

Last time checked it was a question for the men in their mid 30's...which the women's defense league might feel is a calling to come into the room to slam younger women, criticize some men for their preferences, and basically disrupt the thread and bloat it with content they want to hear and believe in.

 

And when did women because experts on men anyway? Sometimes I feel like some women think they know more about men than men themselves.

 

If you ask men a question...shouldn't the men be the ones answering? It's like a trap just to ambush men that do comment who don't say what you want to hear, and then the guy who does gets likes all around...I've seen some members who've figured that out.

 

Point being, if it is their opinion then they are entitled to it...It's not about liking everything you hear.

Threads like this just recycle themselves and go down the same way, an I believe that's because some people aren't happy with what they hear.

Edited March 26, 2015 by Ninjainpajamas

[Buddhist]

Last time checked it was a question for the men in their mid 30's...

 

I missed the terms and conditions of this site that state only the intended gender may reply to a post. I see plenty of men and women replying to posts in which female perspectives are requested. Can't see any problem with the reverse. Since the OP referenced my posts and replied to them, I'll take that as notification that she finds them relevant and of value.

Edited March 26, 2015 by Buddhist

[Ruby Slippers]

losangelena, my point was simply that old people can stay in good shape, that women don't all just fall apart after 40. I've visited certain places in Europe where men in their 60s and 70s were hot in speedos, women in their 50 and 60s were still fit and looking fabulous in their stylish outfits. They have a strong fitness culture in these parts of the world and don't buy into the myth that over 40 = old, washed up, and out of shape.

 

Last time checked it was a question for the men in their mid 30's...which the women's defense league might feel is a calling to come into the room to slam younger women, criticize some men for their preferences, and basically disrupt the thread and bloat it with content they want to hear and believe in.

To be fair, first some men started blasting older women, which I suppose was inevitable in this thread on this forum. But I agree with you that no blasting of anybody was called for. I was relieved that all the negative energy was balanced out with something more positive. Life doesn't have to be this brooding hate fest

 

...and then the guy who does gets likes all around...

I liked all the posts from men who offered their honest opinions without throwing in a few jabs at older women. I just don't find all that negativity likable.

 

But it did become clearer to me through this thread that the topic of female age is a favored attack point for men. I just wonder why these guys are so bitter. Bad things have happened to me, but I've maintained a mostly positive attitude in spite of them.

[Rejected Rosebud]

Typical feminism trope used to shame men for being attracted to what is perfectly natural to them- a younger, feminine female.

 

What was the "feminist trope" I must have missed it? Honestly hudson701, I don't want to be mean, but really you did come off like a guy with a pretty repellent attitude that women, young (like me I'm 25 - well I guess that is bordering on old to you!! ) or old would dislike!! I swear!! And a little reality check - no, young women do NOT prefer old guys. Sure some do but it's not the norm!

[Rejected Rosebud]

Has nothing to do with you being good or bad as a person. Putting other things ahead of getting married does do make a woman less marketable as wife material

Less MARKETABLE as "wife material"??!! Where have I been all my life, I have never heard such things!! How "marketable" are you yourself??

[katiegrl]

No way if a woman has never been married and past 30 it a red flag to me. I know I am 30 and never been married but how many time in the history of the wold has a female ask a guy to marry her?

 

I could see if she just turned 30 and was going to get married and was engaged but he died or it got broken off for what ever reason.

 

I want a female with only a carry on of emotion baggage not a u haul trucks worth of baggage.

 

Let me say the OP might be a great person I am just saying I seen woman in there 30s that bounced around from guy to guy like it the thing to do. Hell I seen it in my own family and who wants to date a 30+ year old female with 3 kids by 3 different men and been riding a D carousel for 15 years. Jumping from guy to guy and think they deserve a good guy give me a break.

 

Oh, so now you are only 30? You said earlier in another thread (calling yourself a loser) that you were 32. No matter ... what kills me is your comment you have never been married.

 

Dude, accordingly to your last thread, you have NEVER even had a girlfriend!!!

 

And after reading the above post from you, with your attitude I am not surprised.

[road]

Last time checked it was a question for the men in their mid 30's...which the women's defense league might feel is a calling to come into the room to slam younger women, criticize some men for their preferences, and basically disrupt the thread and bloat it with content they want to hear and believe in.

 

And when did women because experts on men anyway? Sometimes I feel like some women think they know more about men than men themselves.

 

If you ask men a question...shouldn't the men be the ones answering? It's like a trap just to ambush men that do comment who don't say what you want to hear, and then the guy who does gets likes all around...I've seen some members who've figured that out.

 

Point being, if it is their opinion then they are entitled to it...It's not about liking everything you hear.

Threads like this just recycle themselves and go down the same way, an I believe that's because some people aren't happy with what they hear.

 

 

The truth.

[road]

Mini-rant ahead:

 

No offense to either of you or your parents—I assume all of you are lovely—but at the end of the day, who cares?! My mom is 50 lbs overweight and has never worked out a day in her life. That doesn't mean that my dad, who was married to her for 30 years before he died, didn't love her all the same until his last dying breath.

 

Society's so hung up on looks. Some people aren't fit and trim at 25 or 37 or 44 or 72. That doesn't mean that someone won't find them attractive and worthy of love and affection. You're both right—looks fade. What's important is a person's ability to love, their kindness, character, and ability to contribute to an equal partnership.

 

 

Usually it is the people that let themselves go are the one's to complain that society is hung up on appearances.

[road]

Less MARKETABLE as "wife material"??!! Where have I been all my life, I have never heard such things!! How "marketable" are you yourself??

 

 

Please re-read the thread title and OP's opening post.

 

 

It is no about what you think, or other women think.

 

 

Oh and what you think about what men think does not matter to us men.

[William]

Noting some known or suspected previously banned members operating in this thread, moderation thanks those members who attempted to address the topic for their input and I'll close this up while moderation investigates the rest. Hopefully the thread starter received input which was helpful.